XWP: Chakram
I'm very tired. Harry Potter took a lot out of me. Maybe I'll write a review of what I thought about the finale but right now I'm just like, "I'm too old to go to midnight show and get jacked up with excitement that makes it difficult to sleep once you've survived the parking lot traffic and have driven home at three in the morning on a surprisingly crowded highway."
Still. Worth it.
And what about that American soccer team? I'm so in love with them. Is it weird to declare your love for a team when you're on a lunch date? Even if you were watching the game at the time? Is that off putting? Or adorably quirky? (Because it's not a joke. It is a real and abiding love.)
Oh well.
But now it's time to write this review, ya'll. And I'm so tired that I used the word "ya'll". I'm so ashamed.
1) The details of Chakram are rather fuzzy to me, which is unfortunate, because I just watched it, like, yesterday I think. But I believe that it opens with Ares (haven't seen him in a while!) and this new god named Kal, who is the god of war in that particular area of the world. (And that particular part of the world is a little up in the air. Where are they? Xena, Gabrielle, and their band are in Roman territory and they don't travel too far in the episode so they should still be dealing only with Ares except with a Martian name change.)
Kal really wants Xena because Xena has something that he needs to perpetuate what, most likely, is some kind of nefarious plan. And he's mad at Ares to boot because a long time ago Ares stole the dark chakram and gave it to Xena.
So, there's not a ton of context to this scene, but this gives us a small insight into the chakram. Xena's chakram is, first of all, the "dark chakram" and Ares gave it to her.
2) But there's this other, chakram, you understand? And Kal really wants to get it, for reasons currently unknown, so he sends in a priest to retrieve it for him. It does not end well for that priest because, as he picks the chakram up from a giant yin-yang symbol, he bursts into flame.
I hate when that happens!
3) Remember in Fallen Angel when Gabrielle and Xena were resurrected?
Yeah, I do, too.
What you may not recall is that Xena's chakram was broken by Callisto as it struck Xena's spine in The Ides Of March. Amarice, crafty Amazon that she is, collected it and saved it as they were making their escape, so she presents it to Xena while she and Gabrielle are still in their crucifix scrubs.
It's a nice moment after Amarice leaves. They kind of stare at each other, Xena looking particularly adoring and Gabrielle says, "We're back. Together." Xena just gazes at her, all lovey, and responds, "Always."
4) But the problem is that Xena's not quite herself. You see, she has no memory of her chakram, and since it's her frakking chakram, that's kind of weird, right?
5) They all go to a market to get some clothes and some weapons.
New outfit time! I actually liked Gabrielle's peacenik outfit. It was incredibly modest to the new outfit of hardcore!Gabrielle because now she's in little more than a skimpy pair of shorts and a bikini halter top. I mean, I'm not really complaining or anything, but she's barely in that top, if you know what I mean.
And Xena! She gets all glammed up because she's not really herself. Though she looks great.
Gabrielle also gets some new weapons. Remember when she unceremoniously dumped her staff in the Ganges at the end of The Way? Well, she's back on a weapons kick because she's a badass now and she has these new things called sais, which are like giant forks.
6) It's a good thing that Gabrielle has these new weapons (and that she's instantly proficient with them) because Kal's men find Xena and the others in the market. Xena can't fight.
As we find out after they get away, not only does Xena not remember her chakram . . . She doesn't remember anything violent or dark from her past. The names "Callisto" and "Alit" don't even ring a tiny bell. Gabrielle says that Xena has lost herself.
Did Eli fuck up? What exactly happened that Xena came back to life with such elemental parts of herself missing? Particularly since Gabrielle came back whole?
Or maybe . . . Gabrielle's now a buff warrior who is willing and anxious to kick ass, especially if it means protecting Xena. Gabrielle seems to have absorbed some of Xena's "darkness" while Xena has absorbed a bunch of Gabrielle's "light". Not that I think Gabrielle's so dark that she no light, but it's almost like Eli brought back Gabrielle a little wrong, too.
7) And by the way? Seriously, you guys, Gabrielle's chest is ridonkulous in her new outfit. She's huge!
8) They all go to find Eli's friend Caleb, a guy Eli thinks might be able to help them figure out what's up with Xena.
On the way, Joxer has an awkward conversation with Eli about his love for Gabrielle. Because, as we all know, Joxer has been in love with Gabrielle since . . . Well, I'm not sure. Definitely since season three (Xena kind of tortures him about it in Been There, Done That). But he's talking to Eli, who is so also totally in love with Gabrielle. But Eli must be in denial or doesn't see Joxer as competition. He just tells Joxer to tell Gabrielle, already.
9) Meanwhile, Gabrielle and Joxer are busy telling Xena stories about her past. Joxer tells Xena she should talk to Eli, like Eli's some kind of expert on Xena, which is so weird, because he's only been in, like, four episodes up to this point and he usually hangs out around Gabrielle.
Xena's in denial that the person they're describing is her because everything they're telling her is so not what she feels inside.
And, on top of that, she's really wigging Amarice out, who is so not okay with this new Xena. Amarice is a strange bird. She's so eager to be a warrior that she's uncomfortable with any other kind of world view.
10) While Xena goes with the creeped out Amarice to track some animals, Gabrielle has a talk with Eli. She lets him know, if he couldn't already tell, that she's on a new path, that the way of love just wasn't for her. She tells him, "Right now Xena is everything I always wanted her to be but without her dark side, she's lost, she's off balance." Gabrielle sees her path to be the way of friendship, just as she described to Xena in The Ides Of March and, more specifically, it seems to really be the way of Xena.
So, if she has to kill to help or protect Xena, she'll do it.
And, in a way, isn't that kind of the way of love? Her love for Xena is so incredible and so unconditional, that she shapes her life around it. Even if it could mean violence and death, there's still something very pure about that.
11) Kal attacks Amarice and Xena while they're away and, to protect Amarice, Xena goes with him to the temple housing the chakram that killed that priest.
Finally, we're getting some insight: Kal wants Xena to remain pure. We still don't know why, but that's a start. Purity and chakrams. Okay.
But, before he can fully take advantage of Xena in any way, Ares pops up and he isn't happy about what's going on, and he and Kal engage in a huge god fight, which enables Xena to escape back to the others.
12) They all go to Eli's friend Caleb's hovel and find him missing. It turns out that Caleb was a priest, which isn't good, because Kal told Xena about a priest he had used to get the chakram, the purest in his order, who died because of it. (That guy who burst into flames earlier in the episode.)
Xena breaks the news to Eli and Eli gets super emo which isn't very loving.
13) So, of course, Xena goes and takes a bath.
She's interrupted by Joxer, who chooses someone even worse than Eli to talk about declaring his love for Gabrielle with because, um, Xena loves Gabrielle the most out of anyone! For real!
Still, Xena lets loose with some helpful advice (because it's not like Joxer could ever compete with Xena in Gabrielle's love department). She tells him to make sure he doesn't attach strings to it, to not force her to respond. It should be unconditional.
14) Joxer leaves and Ares shows up. Naked Xena does attract a crowd.
Of course, he does his best to manipulate her purity to his benefit, even going so far as to try to work her against Gabrielle (when the Gabster shows up when he's about to kiss Xena), but playing on Gabrielle's problems with Xena not being "herself", meaning that Gabrielle sees something wrong with the way Xena is now.
It's not a bad tact. It has to be strange to be Xena at this point, to know the words but not the true meaning of words like "bad", "violence", or "evil" and to know that she once lived in a world filled with those things and that the people around her, the ones she's supposed to love the most and the ones who love her the most, are actively trying to take her back to darkness, saying that she's not "right" with it.
15) Reading through Caleb's books, Eli finds more pieces to the puzzle. They need to get the chakram of light, what Kal and Ares are both trying to get Xena to get for them, because that chakram has the ability to kill gods. It can only be retrieved by someone of the purest soul.
So, the ultimate plan for Ares and Kal is to get that chakram and to use it to wipe out all the other gods, effectively leaving them the ultimate power. Well, one of them, because Kal and Ares are not exactly on the same side, though they have an uneasy alliance up to a point.
16) Before they go to retrieve the chakram, Xena prays to the gods to let them know if she's doing the right thing in going back to her old self. She can't understand, in her pure state, how it could possibly be a good or beneficial thing to do, not only for herself but for everyone.
Gabrielle comes in in the middle of Xena's prayer. She tells Xena that she believes restoring her darkness is vital. She says, "I think you have to know the darkest part of yourself to be whole." Earlier in the episode, Xena had admitted that she felt somewhat empty. She's only working on half reserves and has no balance. And that's the thing about Xena that is hard for a lot of people around her to get, including Gabrielle in their earlier times together: She does have a tremendous capacity to hate and violence but she also has an equally tremendous capacity for love and good. When one is taken away . . . There's not only no balance, but it kind of negates the other.
Because, again, what is good without evil?
17) They all break their way into the temple and Xena manages to retrieve the chakram of light.
She has the opportunity to use it to strike down Ares and/or Kal, but she can't bring herself to do it. She can't and won't kill.
This is not good news for the others because now they're surrounded.
I don't know why Gabrielle doesn't take the chakram herself to do some damage. Since Xena retrieved it, it's now up for grabs, so Gabrielle would be able to wield it herself. All those years watching Xena throw it must have taught her some kind of technique.
18) Joxer, in the middle of the fight, decides that's the right time to tell Gabrielle he loves her. She can't really respond because, you know, two angry gods are outside, but good on you, Joxer.
19) Eli reads more of Caleb's book (he really should have read the whole thing before they went in . . . would have saved them some time) and learns that if the light chakram and the dark chakram are joined, the chakrams neutralize (balance out) and the power to destroy gods is, well, destroyed.
My question? Why is the light chakram that chakram that can kill gods? Why not the dark chakram?
Amarice gives Xena the dark chakram so they can put it on the yin yang symbol and it magically repairs itself. That's great! But before she can put the chakrams together, Kal and Ares and the army burst threw and the battle ensues and, when Kal is standing over Gabrielle about to kill her, Xena whips the light chakram off the altar and slices him, killing him.
So, relatively pure!Gabrielle will kill for Xena and pure!Xena will kill for Gabrielle. Funny how that works.
20) Ares tries to push Eli away, but has to stop because there's something strange about Eli that obviously freaks Ares out big time. More explanation will be forthcoming in future episodes.
21) Xena has the light chakram to Ares' throat, but doesn't want to kill him because she's still pure. Her murder of Kal was nearly impulse and instinct in trying to protect Gabrielle. She doesn't really have the will to commit a more meditated act.
Instead, she does exactly what Ares does not want: She picks up the dark chakram and combines the two and, with some mojo magic, they combine to create a new chakram.
This one is crazy, too. It has a new place to hold it and it splits into two.
I miss the old one.
22) Combining the chakrams brings back Xena's memories and her balance. So, of course, she kicks ass, and Ares has to concede.
Before he leaves, he asks her why she neutralized it when she had something so powerful in her hands. She responds, "No one deserves that kind of power, Ares. Least of all me."
It so totally reminds me of Harry Potter! Spoiler alert if you have been living under a rock and haven't read the last book or haven't seen the movie: Harry gets the Elder Wand from Voldemort because he was its true owner, since Malfoy had disarmed it from Dumbledore and Harry had disarmed Malfoy.
So, the battle is over, right? And Harry has the wand. The most powerful wand in the wizarding world. And he can keep it and use it and have that power or he can destroy it. And what does he do? Well, he's Harry Potter, of course, so he destroys it.
23) The group takes their leave of Eli, who is going to kick back and read through Caleb's thing.
Boring. (Xena points that out to him, too.)
24) After the part ways, Xena thanks Gabrielle for all she did. You see, when Xena was praying and asking for a sign that she was going the right thing, Gabrielle showed up and pointed the way. Gabrielle is Xena's arrow and her conscience. I think that bringing back Xena's darkness made her whole and made her truly "good" but I think it's Gabrielle that actually brings her balance.
Man, okay, got through that. Wasn't sure if I would, but I downloaded Lily's Theme from the Deathly Hallows Part II soundtrack, because it's so beautiful and it opened the movie and gave me fucking chills, so that helped. I somehow doubt that Chakram ranks very high on a Xenite favorite episode poll, but I do quite like it. I like warrior!Gabrielle and pure!Xena and I really like thinking about how Xena's darkness defines her and defines the people around her. I think it's a consistently interesting idea to play around with. And, really, as far as season five is concerned, this episode is pretty good. So I'm going to give Chakram 3.5 out of 5 airlocks.
Still. Worth it.
And what about that American soccer team? I'm so in love with them. Is it weird to declare your love for a team when you're on a lunch date? Even if you were watching the game at the time? Is that off putting? Or adorably quirky? (Because it's not a joke. It is a real and abiding love.)
Oh well.
But now it's time to write this review, ya'll. And I'm so tired that I used the word "ya'll". I'm so ashamed.
1) The details of Chakram are rather fuzzy to me, which is unfortunate, because I just watched it, like, yesterday I think. But I believe that it opens with Ares (haven't seen him in a while!) and this new god named Kal, who is the god of war in that particular area of the world. (And that particular part of the world is a little up in the air. Where are they? Xena, Gabrielle, and their band are in Roman territory and they don't travel too far in the episode so they should still be dealing only with Ares except with a Martian name change.)
Kal really wants Xena because Xena has something that he needs to perpetuate what, most likely, is some kind of nefarious plan. And he's mad at Ares to boot because a long time ago Ares stole the dark chakram and gave it to Xena.
So, there's not a ton of context to this scene, but this gives us a small insight into the chakram. Xena's chakram is, first of all, the "dark chakram" and Ares gave it to her.
2) But there's this other, chakram, you understand? And Kal really wants to get it, for reasons currently unknown, so he sends in a priest to retrieve it for him. It does not end well for that priest because, as he picks the chakram up from a giant yin-yang symbol, he bursts into flame.
I hate when that happens!
3) Remember in Fallen Angel when Gabrielle and Xena were resurrected?
Yeah, I do, too.
What you may not recall is that Xena's chakram was broken by Callisto as it struck Xena's spine in The Ides Of March. Amarice, crafty Amazon that she is, collected it and saved it as they were making their escape, so she presents it to Xena while she and Gabrielle are still in their crucifix scrubs.
It's a nice moment after Amarice leaves. They kind of stare at each other, Xena looking particularly adoring and Gabrielle says, "We're back. Together." Xena just gazes at her, all lovey, and responds, "Always."
4) But the problem is that Xena's not quite herself. You see, she has no memory of her chakram, and since it's her frakking chakram, that's kind of weird, right?
5) They all go to a market to get some clothes and some weapons.
New outfit time! I actually liked Gabrielle's peacenik outfit. It was incredibly modest to the new outfit of hardcore!Gabrielle because now she's in little more than a skimpy pair of shorts and a bikini halter top. I mean, I'm not really complaining or anything, but she's barely in that top, if you know what I mean.
And Xena! She gets all glammed up because she's not really herself. Though she looks great.
Gabrielle also gets some new weapons. Remember when she unceremoniously dumped her staff in the Ganges at the end of The Way? Well, she's back on a weapons kick because she's a badass now and she has these new things called sais, which are like giant forks.
6) It's a good thing that Gabrielle has these new weapons (and that she's instantly proficient with them) because Kal's men find Xena and the others in the market. Xena can't fight.
As we find out after they get away, not only does Xena not remember her chakram . . . She doesn't remember anything violent or dark from her past. The names "Callisto" and "Alit" don't even ring a tiny bell. Gabrielle says that Xena has lost herself.
Did Eli fuck up? What exactly happened that Xena came back to life with such elemental parts of herself missing? Particularly since Gabrielle came back whole?
Or maybe . . . Gabrielle's now a buff warrior who is willing and anxious to kick ass, especially if it means protecting Xena. Gabrielle seems to have absorbed some of Xena's "darkness" while Xena has absorbed a bunch of Gabrielle's "light". Not that I think Gabrielle's so dark that she no light, but it's almost like Eli brought back Gabrielle a little wrong, too.
7) And by the way? Seriously, you guys, Gabrielle's chest is ridonkulous in her new outfit. She's huge!
8) They all go to find Eli's friend Caleb, a guy Eli thinks might be able to help them figure out what's up with Xena.
On the way, Joxer has an awkward conversation with Eli about his love for Gabrielle. Because, as we all know, Joxer has been in love with Gabrielle since . . . Well, I'm not sure. Definitely since season three (Xena kind of tortures him about it in Been There, Done That). But he's talking to Eli, who is so also totally in love with Gabrielle. But Eli must be in denial or doesn't see Joxer as competition. He just tells Joxer to tell Gabrielle, already.
9) Meanwhile, Gabrielle and Joxer are busy telling Xena stories about her past. Joxer tells Xena she should talk to Eli, like Eli's some kind of expert on Xena, which is so weird, because he's only been in, like, four episodes up to this point and he usually hangs out around Gabrielle.
Xena's in denial that the person they're describing is her because everything they're telling her is so not what she feels inside.
And, on top of that, she's really wigging Amarice out, who is so not okay with this new Xena. Amarice is a strange bird. She's so eager to be a warrior that she's uncomfortable with any other kind of world view.
10) While Xena goes with the creeped out Amarice to track some animals, Gabrielle has a talk with Eli. She lets him know, if he couldn't already tell, that she's on a new path, that the way of love just wasn't for her. She tells him, "Right now Xena is everything I always wanted her to be but without her dark side, she's lost, she's off balance." Gabrielle sees her path to be the way of friendship, just as she described to Xena in The Ides Of March and, more specifically, it seems to really be the way of Xena.
So, if she has to kill to help or protect Xena, she'll do it.
And, in a way, isn't that kind of the way of love? Her love for Xena is so incredible and so unconditional, that she shapes her life around it. Even if it could mean violence and death, there's still something very pure about that.
11) Kal attacks Amarice and Xena while they're away and, to protect Amarice, Xena goes with him to the temple housing the chakram that killed that priest.
Finally, we're getting some insight: Kal wants Xena to remain pure. We still don't know why, but that's a start. Purity and chakrams. Okay.
But, before he can fully take advantage of Xena in any way, Ares pops up and he isn't happy about what's going on, and he and Kal engage in a huge god fight, which enables Xena to escape back to the others.
12) They all go to Eli's friend Caleb's hovel and find him missing. It turns out that Caleb was a priest, which isn't good, because Kal told Xena about a priest he had used to get the chakram, the purest in his order, who died because of it. (That guy who burst into flames earlier in the episode.)
Xena breaks the news to Eli and Eli gets super emo which isn't very loving.
13) So, of course, Xena goes and takes a bath.
She's interrupted by Joxer, who chooses someone even worse than Eli to talk about declaring his love for Gabrielle with because, um, Xena loves Gabrielle the most out of anyone! For real!
Still, Xena lets loose with some helpful advice (because it's not like Joxer could ever compete with Xena in Gabrielle's love department). She tells him to make sure he doesn't attach strings to it, to not force her to respond. It should be unconditional.
14) Joxer leaves and Ares shows up. Naked Xena does attract a crowd.
Of course, he does his best to manipulate her purity to his benefit, even going so far as to try to work her against Gabrielle (when the Gabster shows up when he's about to kiss Xena), but playing on Gabrielle's problems with Xena not being "herself", meaning that Gabrielle sees something wrong with the way Xena is now.
It's not a bad tact. It has to be strange to be Xena at this point, to know the words but not the true meaning of words like "bad", "violence", or "evil" and to know that she once lived in a world filled with those things and that the people around her, the ones she's supposed to love the most and the ones who love her the most, are actively trying to take her back to darkness, saying that she's not "right" with it.
15) Reading through Caleb's books, Eli finds more pieces to the puzzle. They need to get the chakram of light, what Kal and Ares are both trying to get Xena to get for them, because that chakram has the ability to kill gods. It can only be retrieved by someone of the purest soul.
So, the ultimate plan for Ares and Kal is to get that chakram and to use it to wipe out all the other gods, effectively leaving them the ultimate power. Well, one of them, because Kal and Ares are not exactly on the same side, though they have an uneasy alliance up to a point.
16) Before they go to retrieve the chakram, Xena prays to the gods to let them know if she's doing the right thing in going back to her old self. She can't understand, in her pure state, how it could possibly be a good or beneficial thing to do, not only for herself but for everyone.
Gabrielle comes in in the middle of Xena's prayer. She tells Xena that she believes restoring her darkness is vital. She says, "I think you have to know the darkest part of yourself to be whole." Earlier in the episode, Xena had admitted that she felt somewhat empty. She's only working on half reserves and has no balance. And that's the thing about Xena that is hard for a lot of people around her to get, including Gabrielle in their earlier times together: She does have a tremendous capacity to hate and violence but she also has an equally tremendous capacity for love and good. When one is taken away . . . There's not only no balance, but it kind of negates the other.
Because, again, what is good without evil?
17) They all break their way into the temple and Xena manages to retrieve the chakram of light.
She has the opportunity to use it to strike down Ares and/or Kal, but she can't bring herself to do it. She can't and won't kill.
This is not good news for the others because now they're surrounded.
I don't know why Gabrielle doesn't take the chakram herself to do some damage. Since Xena retrieved it, it's now up for grabs, so Gabrielle would be able to wield it herself. All those years watching Xena throw it must have taught her some kind of technique.
18) Joxer, in the middle of the fight, decides that's the right time to tell Gabrielle he loves her. She can't really respond because, you know, two angry gods are outside, but good on you, Joxer.
19) Eli reads more of Caleb's book (he really should have read the whole thing before they went in . . . would have saved them some time) and learns that if the light chakram and the dark chakram are joined, the chakrams neutralize (balance out) and the power to destroy gods is, well, destroyed.
My question? Why is the light chakram that chakram that can kill gods? Why not the dark chakram?
Amarice gives Xena the dark chakram so they can put it on the yin yang symbol and it magically repairs itself. That's great! But before she can put the chakrams together, Kal and Ares and the army burst threw and the battle ensues and, when Kal is standing over Gabrielle about to kill her, Xena whips the light chakram off the altar and slices him, killing him.
So, relatively pure!Gabrielle will kill for Xena and pure!Xena will kill for Gabrielle. Funny how that works.
20) Ares tries to push Eli away, but has to stop because there's something strange about Eli that obviously freaks Ares out big time. More explanation will be forthcoming in future episodes.
21) Xena has the light chakram to Ares' throat, but doesn't want to kill him because she's still pure. Her murder of Kal was nearly impulse and instinct in trying to protect Gabrielle. She doesn't really have the will to commit a more meditated act.
Instead, she does exactly what Ares does not want: She picks up the dark chakram and combines the two and, with some mojo magic, they combine to create a new chakram.
This one is crazy, too. It has a new place to hold it and it splits into two.
I miss the old one.
22) Combining the chakrams brings back Xena's memories and her balance. So, of course, she kicks ass, and Ares has to concede.
Before he leaves, he asks her why she neutralized it when she had something so powerful in her hands. She responds, "No one deserves that kind of power, Ares. Least of all me."
It so totally reminds me of Harry Potter! Spoiler alert if you have been living under a rock and haven't read the last book or haven't seen the movie: Harry gets the Elder Wand from Voldemort because he was its true owner, since Malfoy had disarmed it from Dumbledore and Harry had disarmed Malfoy.
So, the battle is over, right? And Harry has the wand. The most powerful wand in the wizarding world. And he can keep it and use it and have that power or he can destroy it. And what does he do? Well, he's Harry Potter, of course, so he destroys it.
23) The group takes their leave of Eli, who is going to kick back and read through Caleb's thing.
Boring. (Xena points that out to him, too.)
24) After the part ways, Xena thanks Gabrielle for all she did. You see, when Xena was praying and asking for a sign that she was going the right thing, Gabrielle showed up and pointed the way. Gabrielle is Xena's arrow and her conscience. I think that bringing back Xena's darkness made her whole and made her truly "good" but I think it's Gabrielle that actually brings her balance.
Man, okay, got through that. Wasn't sure if I would, but I downloaded Lily's Theme from the Deathly Hallows Part II soundtrack, because it's so beautiful and it opened the movie and gave me fucking chills, so that helped. I somehow doubt that Chakram ranks very high on a Xenite favorite episode poll, but I do quite like it. I like warrior!Gabrielle and pure!Xena and I really like thinking about how Xena's darkness defines her and defines the people around her. I think it's a consistently interesting idea to play around with. And, really, as far as season five is concerned, this episode is pretty good. So I'm going to give Chakram 3.5 out of 5 airlocks.