Twenty questions
Забавный рассказ Erma Bombeck состоит из... вопросительных предложений!
Очень рекомендую тем, у кого трудности с порядком слов. Вопросы как прямые, так и косвенные.
***
Next to having my teeth cleaned without a sedative, my second favorite thing is playing Twenty
Questions with my teen-age son at one in the morning. It is like carrying on a conversation with a
computer with a dead battery.
“Is that you, Roger?”I shout from the bedroom.
“Who do you think it is?”
“What time is it?”
“What time do you think it is?” he answers.
“Did I hear the clock strike one?”
“What clock?”
“The one in the hallway. Did you have a good time at the dance?”
“Dance?”
“You know, the one you went to. Was it jammed?”
“Who told you it was jammed?”
“No one told me,” I shouted. “I’m asking. I suppose you got a pizza afterward?”
“How did you know?”
“I can smell it. A pizza sinks into your pores. You can smell it until the next shower.”
“You want me to take a shower at this time of night?”
“No. I said when you eat a pizza it sinks into your pores, which you can smell until the next shower.”
“What’s that got to do with the dance being crowded?”
“Nothing,” I sighed. “Do you want anything to eat?”
“On top of the pizza?”
“Then you did have pizza. Did you see Marcia?”
“Marcia who?”
“YOUR SISTER, MARCIA.”
“Was I supposed to?”
“You mean both of you were at the same dance and you didn’t talk to one another?”
“What’s to talk about?” he asked.
“Is that the clock dinging again?”
“What clock?”
“The one in the hallway. Did you let the dog out?”
“Why?”
“I thought I heard something scratching.”
“Want me to check it?” he queried.
“Would you see if it’s Marcia?”
“What would she be doing scratching on the door?”
“Is it the dog then?” I asked.
“Is that something to call your daughter?”
“What are you talking about?” I asked.
“What are you talking about?” he responded.
“Did you hang up your clothes?”
“Can’t I do it tomorrow?”
“Do you know how much I spend in cleaning bills because you don’t hang up your clothes?”
“How much?”
“Don’t be cute. How late is it?”
“How late is what?”
“The hour. I think you are trying to keep the time from me, aren’t you?”
“Why would I want to do that?”
“Because it is late,” I said.“Who said it was late?” he asked.
“Didn’t I just hear the clock chime?”
“What clock?”
“Roger! Exactly what time is it?”
He was asleep. He had tricked me again. I had had my Twenty Questions and he had responded with
his Twenty Questions. I was wide awake.
My husband rolled over restlessly. “Is that you babbling?” he asked.
“Who do you think it is?” I snapped.
“What time is it?” he yawned.
“What time do you think it is?” I retorted.
“I don’t really care,” he said and drifted off.
I shook him by the throat. “Wake up! You’ve got eighteen more questions to ask or you’re out of the
game!”
Очень рекомендую тем, у кого трудности с порядком слов. Вопросы как прямые, так и косвенные.
***
Next to having my teeth cleaned without a sedative, my second favorite thing is playing Twenty
Questions with my teen-age son at one in the morning. It is like carrying on a conversation with a
computer with a dead battery.
“Is that you, Roger?”I shout from the bedroom.
“Who do you think it is?”
“What time is it?”
“What time do you think it is?” he answers.
“Did I hear the clock strike one?”
“What clock?”
“The one in the hallway. Did you have a good time at the dance?”
“Dance?”
“You know, the one you went to. Was it jammed?”
“Who told you it was jammed?”
“No one told me,” I shouted. “I’m asking. I suppose you got a pizza afterward?”
“How did you know?”
“I can smell it. A pizza sinks into your pores. You can smell it until the next shower.”
“You want me to take a shower at this time of night?”
“No. I said when you eat a pizza it sinks into your pores, which you can smell until the next shower.”
“What’s that got to do with the dance being crowded?”
“Nothing,” I sighed. “Do you want anything to eat?”
“On top of the pizza?”
“Then you did have pizza. Did you see Marcia?”
“Marcia who?”
“YOUR SISTER, MARCIA.”
“Was I supposed to?”
“You mean both of you were at the same dance and you didn’t talk to one another?”
“What’s to talk about?” he asked.
“Is that the clock dinging again?”
“What clock?”
“The one in the hallway. Did you let the dog out?”
“Why?”
“I thought I heard something scratching.”
“Want me to check it?” he queried.
“Would you see if it’s Marcia?”
“What would she be doing scratching on the door?”
“Is it the dog then?” I asked.
“Is that something to call your daughter?”
“What are you talking about?” I asked.
“What are you talking about?” he responded.
“Did you hang up your clothes?”
“Can’t I do it tomorrow?”
“Do you know how much I spend in cleaning bills because you don’t hang up your clothes?”
“How much?”
“Don’t be cute. How late is it?”
“How late is what?”
“The hour. I think you are trying to keep the time from me, aren’t you?”
“Why would I want to do that?”
“Because it is late,” I said.“Who said it was late?” he asked.
“Didn’t I just hear the clock chime?”
“What clock?”
“Roger! Exactly what time is it?”
He was asleep. He had tricked me again. I had had my Twenty Questions and he had responded with
his Twenty Questions. I was wide awake.
My husband rolled over restlessly. “Is that you babbling?” he asked.
“Who do you think it is?” I snapped.
“What time is it?” he yawned.
“What time do you think it is?” I retorted.
“I don’t really care,” he said and drifted off.
I shook him by the throat. “Wake up! You’ve got eighteen more questions to ask or you’re out of the
game!”