Well it's a Path, It must go somewhere....
aight then. so the last entry was from 2006 and it was looking like i was going into the army again. well the paper screwed up and the kicked me completely out and wanted me to join back. when this happened i walked away, i wasn't in the irr any more so they couldn't make me do anything. In july of 06 i got saved and i chose to walk away from everybody and everything i knew so i could grow up and change. I knew if i keep with my old ways i couldn't change like i wanted to. It's more than just miso, i left theodore alone, the bikers, drugs, drinking, fighting, friends, and enemies. I couldn't stand being pissed off all the time and never finding happiness. I knew what i had to do but didn't know how. then one day i was outside of miso live when i heard a voice tell me to go inside of room 170 and listen to this guy play his guitar. so eventually i did and when i was sitting there everything turned black and felt like i was being covered in lead. the voice came back and started talking to me about my sins and how i was at the point of no return with some of the things and people i was hanging with. I replied "i going insane, if this is god prove it." then the preacher stood up and asked if anyone want to get saved. so i did, feeling bad about calling god out. that night i had peace, i wasn't pissed off, sad, depressed or anything.
So with that i left my old world behind. I put people around me who could change me for the better and i started trusting god. for three years i forced a change in myself. it sucked sometimes, but the end was definitely worth the means. First(and hardest) thing i had to do is forgive. Forgive people and forgive myself. You can't change how people see you and treat unless you change how you see yourself and treat yourself. I had a lot of help with this. I had people who always encouraged me no matter what. It took awhile but i got the point, I wasn't as bad off as i thought. Second i had to change how i interacted with my environment. Running around with bats is not good. Keeping a cool level head works wonders. Treat others as you want to be treated. Sounds so cliche but oddly enough it works 9 times out of 10. By changing these things about me concusly, i started to change all around. Didn't get mad as much, quit fighting, people started trusting me more, no one was scared of me(well the ones i didn't want scared of me;) I started seeing things that I didn't see before. the beauty in things, not just on the outside but more importantly on the inside.
The last thing I changed was the order of value. What had the most value down to the lest value. Oddly enough money is pretty much at the bottom of the list. It was replaced by loyalty, honor, truth, honesty, heart, and love. Remember, The things on the inside is more important than the outside. During this time of change, I've worked on different roofing companies, remodeled trailers in theodore, was a waiter at the country club of mobile. Every job oddly enough taught me something else about people and interacting with them. Sometimes it was good, sometimes it was bad. But the point is I learned. Oh yea, someone hit me while i was on my motorcycle and totaled it out. Sucks!!!
Now I'm up to 2008 july, right when I think I'm done with my path and learned all i can learn relatively quickly my world turns upside down the shot with and 12 gauge. Twice. My engine blows up causing me to lose my job as a waiter. Now i have no ride, no job, and no money. WTF!!! I couldn't get a job and was fixing to go south on my bills, then a guy told me about heading out of mobile to find work. So the next month i go to baton rouge to work with a self loader. Made some money and blew the money. Didn't fix my truck or anything. So I get back in december and have no money and my mom was moving to memphis. What to do. I stayed with a friend but couldn't pay the rent because i had no job because i had no truck because i had no money because i had no job. Then my dad get's arrested for trafficing drugs and the news puts me on tv twisting everything I said, had a major break down with church, and still single; I decided the best thing for me to do is leave. Leave mobile completely. So I gave away the big things i had and stored the rest at my grandmaws. I took a army duffel bag full of cloths and my guitar. Went to memphis to work a tree surgeon job. After about a month or so and only getting paid 50 dollars i left. Well I had a choice. Go back to mobile(aint happening), stay in memphis(homeless in racist memphis, aint happening), go vagabond(would be cool but no food, aint happening). Then i get a phone call from my mother, she says she's in the virgin islands and said why don't i stay with her down there. So I take my duffel bag and leave my guitar in mobile and head for the virgin islands.
The Virgin Islands, spent four months down there doing NOTHING!!!! But it was beautiful and serene. I now had a chance to sit back take in everything that has happened to me. I spent a lot of days just sitting there thinking about what to do about my father, my old church, being poor, and still single. When i would go around the island i saw that they were some of the poorest people in the world. I mean damn. They had no water, no power, no car, no phone. They had booze though. Yet most of the people I saw and talked to were supremely nice. They had nothing and was laughing and cutting up. Why? That's when all the changing i had been doing came to fruition. Who cares about money or nice cloths or nice cars. All you need is friends that you can rely on and they can rely on you. Everything else is worthless. Why let circumstances and people bring you down or piss you off. Relax and have beer every once in a while. I learned to be satisfied with everything and with nothing.
Well now I'm up to Nov 2009. We were going to buy a house in adamsville, TN. We stop into mobile and stay with my brother till it's time to close, which was in a week. I stop in and see some the cool people and my family. I didn't realize how much I missed them till i got back. Well closing on the house gets pushed back, then pushed back again, then the day before we leave the call with another complication. My mom looks at me and says "well it looks something is wanting us to stay here in mobile. Do you want to stay or go to Tenn?" I thought about and you know what, I felt like it was time to come back home to mobile. But completely different than from when I started down this path in 2006.
Well, I'm here to stay. Aint got no job, aint got no car, aint got no money; and I'm as happy as i can be. I started going door to door cleaning up the mess with my old church. There are still some people I haven't got to yet, that's for their health. I missed pockey's wedding. I'm sorry man. But i did get to make JD's. Started watching anime again. Awesome!!! Found out that live journal was still working and russ. I got an engine for my truck and i'm fixing to try and get my cdl license. Dad's trial is march 1 so hopefully he won't go to jail. All in all, I'm wondering where this path is going to take me.
So with that i left my old world behind. I put people around me who could change me for the better and i started trusting god. for three years i forced a change in myself. it sucked sometimes, but the end was definitely worth the means. First(and hardest) thing i had to do is forgive. Forgive people and forgive myself. You can't change how people see you and treat unless you change how you see yourself and treat yourself. I had a lot of help with this. I had people who always encouraged me no matter what. It took awhile but i got the point, I wasn't as bad off as i thought. Second i had to change how i interacted with my environment. Running around with bats is not good. Keeping a cool level head works wonders. Treat others as you want to be treated. Sounds so cliche but oddly enough it works 9 times out of 10. By changing these things about me concusly, i started to change all around. Didn't get mad as much, quit fighting, people started trusting me more, no one was scared of me(well the ones i didn't want scared of me;) I started seeing things that I didn't see before. the beauty in things, not just on the outside but more importantly on the inside.
The last thing I changed was the order of value. What had the most value down to the lest value. Oddly enough money is pretty much at the bottom of the list. It was replaced by loyalty, honor, truth, honesty, heart, and love. Remember, The things on the inside is more important than the outside. During this time of change, I've worked on different roofing companies, remodeled trailers in theodore, was a waiter at the country club of mobile. Every job oddly enough taught me something else about people and interacting with them. Sometimes it was good, sometimes it was bad. But the point is I learned. Oh yea, someone hit me while i was on my motorcycle and totaled it out. Sucks!!!
Now I'm up to 2008 july, right when I think I'm done with my path and learned all i can learn relatively quickly my world turns upside down the shot with and 12 gauge. Twice. My engine blows up causing me to lose my job as a waiter. Now i have no ride, no job, and no money. WTF!!! I couldn't get a job and was fixing to go south on my bills, then a guy told me about heading out of mobile to find work. So the next month i go to baton rouge to work with a self loader. Made some money and blew the money. Didn't fix my truck or anything. So I get back in december and have no money and my mom was moving to memphis. What to do. I stayed with a friend but couldn't pay the rent because i had no job because i had no truck because i had no money because i had no job. Then my dad get's arrested for trafficing drugs and the news puts me on tv twisting everything I said, had a major break down with church, and still single; I decided the best thing for me to do is leave. Leave mobile completely. So I gave away the big things i had and stored the rest at my grandmaws. I took a army duffel bag full of cloths and my guitar. Went to memphis to work a tree surgeon job. After about a month or so and only getting paid 50 dollars i left. Well I had a choice. Go back to mobile(aint happening), stay in memphis(homeless in racist memphis, aint happening), go vagabond(would be cool but no food, aint happening). Then i get a phone call from my mother, she says she's in the virgin islands and said why don't i stay with her down there. So I take my duffel bag and leave my guitar in mobile and head for the virgin islands.
The Virgin Islands, spent four months down there doing NOTHING!!!! But it was beautiful and serene. I now had a chance to sit back take in everything that has happened to me. I spent a lot of days just sitting there thinking about what to do about my father, my old church, being poor, and still single. When i would go around the island i saw that they were some of the poorest people in the world. I mean damn. They had no water, no power, no car, no phone. They had booze though. Yet most of the people I saw and talked to were supremely nice. They had nothing and was laughing and cutting up. Why? That's when all the changing i had been doing came to fruition. Who cares about money or nice cloths or nice cars. All you need is friends that you can rely on and they can rely on you. Everything else is worthless. Why let circumstances and people bring you down or piss you off. Relax and have beer every once in a while. I learned to be satisfied with everything and with nothing.
Well now I'm up to Nov 2009. We were going to buy a house in adamsville, TN. We stop into mobile and stay with my brother till it's time to close, which was in a week. I stop in and see some the cool people and my family. I didn't realize how much I missed them till i got back. Well closing on the house gets pushed back, then pushed back again, then the day before we leave the call with another complication. My mom looks at me and says "well it looks something is wanting us to stay here in mobile. Do you want to stay or go to Tenn?" I thought about and you know what, I felt like it was time to come back home to mobile. But completely different than from when I started down this path in 2006.
Well, I'm here to stay. Aint got no job, aint got no car, aint got no money; and I'm as happy as i can be. I started going door to door cleaning up the mess with my old church. There are still some people I haven't got to yet, that's for their health. I missed pockey's wedding. I'm sorry man. But i did get to make JD's. Started watching anime again. Awesome!!! Found out that live journal was still working and russ. I got an engine for my truck and i'm fixing to try and get my cdl license. Dad's trial is march 1 so hopefully he won't go to jail. All in all, I'm wondering where this path is going to take me.