takes the pain away
what a great fucking 3 day weekend i had. saturday afternoon sucked cuz i just sat on my ass all day cuz i had no truck. but saturday night was fucking fun as hell, good times right there. its nice to know i can have fun being the only drunk person in a car lol. then sunday was pretty good, helped tom alittle bit with annies car, then went over to katelynns and had dinner with her family, that was cool cuz i havent got to see her in like 2 months. then today! what a great day...... had class, then helped tom move some stuff around this guys house. then me and nick went to the taking back sunday/ jimmy eat world concert. that was a kick ass concert alot of fun. but ooooooooooooooh the fun really started when i got home and greg called me!!!! thats when my life just went down from starting to get alright again, to just being plain shitty. i have to say i've never felt this much like shit in my whole life. u know when you find out that your so called best friend of 13 years and the girl that you love with all your heart have been doing stuff with eachother, you just dont know what to feel. i have to say im glad i dont own a gun, cuz then i wouldtn be here wrighting this right now thats for sure. but its not like alot of people would really care anyways. i had all this hope built up inside of me that if i just kept acting like i always have with you that maybe just maybe one day u'd come back and life would be great again. but all that hope is crushed now, its amazing how that can happen in the lenght of one little phone call from someone, how your life can just all of a sudden turn to crappyness that you've never felt before. sometimes during the past 3 weeks ive wished that a drunk driver would hit my car on my way home from work and just end my depression. but then id think of the hope i had, and right now theres really nothing stopping me. its just something i thought would never happen to me. i thought that the people i know werent like that, and wouldnt do stuff like that to a "friend", but i was wrong.