It's over...again
Children's show is over and with it goes that feeling of stress and such. So, that's good.
But lately, my depression has been cropping up, and people have been really helpful. But i know it takes a toll on them. Especially those who have it much worse than i do.
Been having a lot more heart-to-hearts with isabela lately. They've been good i think. But she tells me that i need to confront some of my past. Get the lingering feelings out there. And be able to fully move on for good. I sure would like to. Even had the chance to a couple of times, just flat chickened out. Which is not good.
Girlfriend and I are in an interesting place. Not a whole lot of communication. Something is bugging her and i want to help. I just don't know what it is or what to do.
Not a whole lot of drive lately.
I saw last exit again, it was closing night/day. It was much harder to watch this time. I broke down during the song with the two brothers. I pulled myself back pretty completely though. But recent feelings and events made that show almost unbearable to watch. I have an idea of what my Grandmother feels like when she sees war movies and has flashbacks and nightmares about when she was a little girl back in Germany during the war.
All in all though, I just wish i could man up and find out what i need to so i can move on. But i would need to reveal a lot more of myself than i have so far to do that, and i really don't want to screw up anything in the future.
P.S.
I stayed home sick today.
But lately, my depression has been cropping up, and people have been really helpful. But i know it takes a toll on them. Especially those who have it much worse than i do.
Been having a lot more heart-to-hearts with isabela lately. They've been good i think. But she tells me that i need to confront some of my past. Get the lingering feelings out there. And be able to fully move on for good. I sure would like to. Even had the chance to a couple of times, just flat chickened out. Which is not good.
Girlfriend and I are in an interesting place. Not a whole lot of communication. Something is bugging her and i want to help. I just don't know what it is or what to do.
Not a whole lot of drive lately.
I saw last exit again, it was closing night/day. It was much harder to watch this time. I broke down during the song with the two brothers. I pulled myself back pretty completely though. But recent feelings and events made that show almost unbearable to watch. I have an idea of what my Grandmother feels like when she sees war movies and has flashbacks and nightmares about when she was a little girl back in Germany during the war.
All in all though, I just wish i could man up and find out what i need to so i can move on. But i would need to reveal a lot more of myself than i have so far to do that, and i really don't want to screw up anything in the future.
P.S.
I stayed home sick today.