Jun 22, 2004 20:40
So my dad came back in town and it was really nice, yet weird visitng with him. i havent seen him in almost 3yrs and alot hasnt changed i guess. althogh more personable than he was before, he ws still dad. the same dad. the dad that takes jokes too far. the dad that talks over you. but i still love him. then came sunday; fathers day. i saw a side of dad that i thoght had died. hes drinking again. and acting obnocious as before. see, he has a new 11yr old stepson, AJ. AJ's dad died a few months back and his mom, my stepmom gained fll custody. i told dad to consider this a new chance to correct where he went wrong with me. well.... at least hes not beating the kid. bt he does talk down to him too mch and is WAY to had on him. especially considered what this kid has gone through.
anyways, dad was supposed to leave town tomorrow morning, bright and early. so i promised him is would go and see him tonight. i went.
he was gone
no goodbye, no note. nothing.
he just left. a day early.
im really hurt. jamies out with her mom and aunt and i dont know where they are. i have noone to talk to in person about htis.
plus jamies leaving for who knows how long to georgia with her aunt. shes going to see her cousin and thats great... but.. damnit i already miss her. i was hoping to have some alone time with her before she left, but that looks like its not happening. shes too busy with her mom and aunt. plus we havent stayed at home for the last few days bc the powers off. jamie stops in to check on the animals while im at work thogh. i feel so bad for the dog. ive been an emotional wreck the past few days and i dont want ot burden jamie with it. i dont want her to leave. i dont want to sleep in my bed alone. its scary. i wish she would get home soon. its been a rough few days at work, and with my teeth fcking up and my dad, i could cry at any moment.
ugh.
i want my damn power on.
i want my damn dog to stop eating her ass
i want my damn bills paid
i want my damn freedom from work
i want my damn girlfriend.