Just me starting to get back into writing...
A Mile in My Heels - Taylor Trinity
I came to Austin, Texas with no expectations of what I thought people were going to be like, and no preconceived notions about its gay community. During my two years in this city, I have experienced every high and low imaginable when it comes to homophobia. Just to set the record straight, I am indeed a drag queen, female impersonator, entertainer, or whatever label you are most comfortable using to identify what I do. I started doing this many years ago, as a joke. I did it for fun, as an escape so to speak from reality. I had no idea what effect it would have on my life at the time. But I have come to embrace and cherish the talent I have of reaching people that I was never able to achieve dressed as a boy.
Austin has quite a flourishing gay community. I have lived in many large cities throughout Texas, and never felt the sense of true belonging that I do here. Along with that though, I have never experienced such prejudice from within the gay community as well. Being that Austin is mostly a college town, and caters to the younger part of its population. Many stereotypical gay genres are excluded and even ridiculed by other members within its community. As united as things may seem from an outside perspective, this town has a long way to go before it can truly call itself a community.
I moved to Austin to start a new life, having just ended a four year relationship. I was optimistic about the possibilities that this city held for me. I began dating again, and found that casual sex, drugs, and self destructive behavior was not only still alive in gay culture, but quite the norm. I was not so much shocked as I was saddened by the big picture of it all. I met some very interesting people with various opinions on gay life, culture, history, and politics. The funny thing was that most of their opinions were so similar and one sided, it was a real culture shock to me, not having grown up in this town. They all want the right to live their lives with whomever they choose, and the right to be accepted by the rest of society, but none of them are willing to stand up for those rights, and be seen or heard in the public’s eye.
I started doing drag in Austin, because I felt the scene here was not what it should be for this size of city. Dallas, Houston, and even San Antonio all have huge drag scenes with entertainers of all genres representing the gay community. But somehow here in Austin these people were being made fun of, joked at, laughed at, and even physically harmed for their taste in gender identity. Well I was not ready to accept this. So I started doing drag again, here in this new city. And the reactions have been quite interesting.
A lot of the younger crowd to much surprise has been totally supportive and even captivated by my art. But of course for every positive there follows the negative. Being that I am a man who dresses in women’s clothing, a lot of gay men in this community find me to be an embarrassment and even a derogatory symbol of their gay community. Yet somehow their casual sex, use of recreational drugs, and pretending to be heterosexual to their straight peers is far less humiliating. So I endeavored to take my dressing as a woman to a whole other level. I decided to organize a fund raiser for a local HIV/AIDS charity organization. Much to my surprise I was nominated and won an award for my work on that benefit. Somewhere deep inside I know it was to show that a drag queen, female impersonator was more to this community than another man in a dress. I’m not going to lie and say I only do drag for the benefit of others. I do it for myself. But in the process of doing it for myself, I find ways of using that attention to help others as well.
If I was to stand in front of the state capitol and talk about Gay rights, and homophobia, and discrimination I might get a nice little audience to listen to my points of view. But dressed as a woman I know that every media person available would be there to take notice, not because of my view points. But they would take notice because of my appearance. If that look is what it takes to get people’s attention, then I will be doing this for years to come. The assumption that all drag queens or transgender people are uneducated, promiscuous, and a threat to society is one that I will not accept and hope that you won’t either.
Whether you are gay, straight, bisexual, transsexual, or whatever we all deserve the same rights, recognition, and respect as anyone else. Each one of us needs to learn that no matter how foreign ones lifestyle may seem to us from the outside it is not our place to judge who they are inside. We all have the choice of whether to hurt or help those around us. If someone is helping those around them and doing positive things within the general community in which they live in, then why should we care what they look like, or whom they identify with more in their lives. We should embrace their strength to be who they truly are without reservation and without judgment and try to learn something about ourselves in the process. Think what you will, but you’ll never know the pain one suffers until you walk a mile in their heels.
I came to Austin, Texas with no expectations of what I thought people were going to be like, and no preconceived notions about its gay community. During my two years in this city, I have experienced every high and low imaginable when it comes to homophobia. Just to set the record straight, I am indeed a drag queen, female impersonator, entertainer, or whatever label you are most comfortable using to identify what I do. I started doing this many years ago, as a joke. I did it for fun, as an escape so to speak from reality. I had no idea what effect it would have on my life at the time. But I have come to embrace and cherish the talent I have of reaching people that I was never able to achieve dressed as a boy.
Austin has quite a flourishing gay community. I have lived in many large cities throughout Texas, and never felt the sense of true belonging that I do here. Along with that though, I have never experienced such prejudice from within the gay community as well. Being that Austin is mostly a college town, and caters to the younger part of its population. Many stereotypical gay genres are excluded and even ridiculed by other members within its community. As united as things may seem from an outside perspective, this town has a long way to go before it can truly call itself a community.
I moved to Austin to start a new life, having just ended a four year relationship. I was optimistic about the possibilities that this city held for me. I began dating again, and found that casual sex, drugs, and self destructive behavior was not only still alive in gay culture, but quite the norm. I was not so much shocked as I was saddened by the big picture of it all. I met some very interesting people with various opinions on gay life, culture, history, and politics. The funny thing was that most of their opinions were so similar and one sided, it was a real culture shock to me, not having grown up in this town. They all want the right to live their lives with whomever they choose, and the right to be accepted by the rest of society, but none of them are willing to stand up for those rights, and be seen or heard in the public’s eye.
I started doing drag in Austin, because I felt the scene here was not what it should be for this size of city. Dallas, Houston, and even San Antonio all have huge drag scenes with entertainers of all genres representing the gay community. But somehow here in Austin these people were being made fun of, joked at, laughed at, and even physically harmed for their taste in gender identity. Well I was not ready to accept this. So I started doing drag again, here in this new city. And the reactions have been quite interesting.
A lot of the younger crowd to much surprise has been totally supportive and even captivated by my art. But of course for every positive there follows the negative. Being that I am a man who dresses in women’s clothing, a lot of gay men in this community find me to be an embarrassment and even a derogatory symbol of their gay community. Yet somehow their casual sex, use of recreational drugs, and pretending to be heterosexual to their straight peers is far less humiliating. So I endeavored to take my dressing as a woman to a whole other level. I decided to organize a fund raiser for a local HIV/AIDS charity organization. Much to my surprise I was nominated and won an award for my work on that benefit. Somewhere deep inside I know it was to show that a drag queen, female impersonator was more to this community than another man in a dress. I’m not going to lie and say I only do drag for the benefit of others. I do it for myself. But in the process of doing it for myself, I find ways of using that attention to help others as well.
If I was to stand in front of the state capitol and talk about Gay rights, and homophobia, and discrimination I might get a nice little audience to listen to my points of view. But dressed as a woman I know that every media person available would be there to take notice, not because of my view points. But they would take notice because of my appearance. If that look is what it takes to get people’s attention, then I will be doing this for years to come. The assumption that all drag queens or transgender people are uneducated, promiscuous, and a threat to society is one that I will not accept and hope that you won’t either.
Whether you are gay, straight, bisexual, transsexual, or whatever we all deserve the same rights, recognition, and respect as anyone else. Each one of us needs to learn that no matter how foreign ones lifestyle may seem to us from the outside it is not our place to judge who they are inside. We all have the choice of whether to hurt or help those around us. If someone is helping those around them and doing positive things within the general community in which they live in, then why should we care what they look like, or whom they identify with more in their lives. We should embrace their strength to be who they truly are without reservation and without judgment and try to learn something about ourselves in the process. Think what you will, but you’ll never know the pain one suffers until you walk a mile in their heels.