you don't have to say what you did i already know
You better watch out, you better think twice, Gossip Girl knows who's been naughty or-- well, not like nice ever made headlines. So let's concentrate on naughty, shall we? I have to say, when I arrived I was disheartened to find so many of my familiar faces missing. But I can put away the tissues and my fainting couch, because you've risen to the occasion, in all senses of the word. Bravo, Taxon; in honor of this week's sexuality questioning and XXX tablet entries, I would never want to quit you. ♥
So, let's get started, shall we? The news waits for no one, and neither do I.
To start things off with a bang-- and I do mean bang-- we have my favorite Space Slut's latest escapades. First he hops into bed with F (by the way, F; the rack is fantastic, but cover the girls up, sweetie. Whore chic is so last year) much to B's chagrin. She seems to have found revenge is a dish best served 6'4 and well muscled; looks like pretty boy's not-so-little brother has the same way with women. (And I thought the relationships were hard to follow on The Hills.) Two Slayers for Two Brothers, with the rest of their man harem on the side. Don't forget to share, ladies. Bogarting Taxon's finest slices of beefcake can only breed resentment.
But what's this I spy with my little eye? B and JT, sharing stories and apologies, and then making plans for scantily clad fun in the sun. Wife swapping is all well and good, you three, but someone needs to put a ring on it before Valtrex is needed by all involved parties.
...Or maybe I was wrong. A source tells me JT and a new face were spotted swapping stories and a mutual love of leather and chrome. Lock that down, B, or your competition just may be the one wrapping her legs 'round his engines. Tramps like you, baby you were born to run.
Have no fear, Taxon, it doesn't end there; B and pretty boy continued their will they, won't they dance. But this time, it included corsets. Hidden kink or desperation, B? Only time will tell. As for our boy; it seems he drowned his sorrows with F (and some recreation time with S) while a certain less than jolly giant drank alone. Or, he was alone until Little Miss Muffet joined him. If this a sibling rivalry thing, D? Or do you and B share more than genetic material?
And where does this leave poor, lonely R? Well, if my sources are to be believed, avoided by F and lying through his teeth to B. Oh what a tangled web, R. Come clean, why don't you? I hear you and F have the first part of that down to a science, but I could be wrong. Why don't we ask her dirty laundry? And I do mean that literally. If linens could talk... Sorry, B. Looks like you got duped. Better luck next time!
That's enough on that; let's put our finger on the pulse of our newest arrivals. Or lack thereof, as the case may be. IkeaLover9 and his fabulous companions, L and P. One seems more enthused about Ikea's patronage than the other, but I don't concern myself with those power struggles. Our Nordic boy's been all over the map; a man after my own heart. Could it be that I've finally found the perfect man?
...A certain scene kid says no. Sadly, these two make Bert and Ernie's relationship look positively glacial. Oh, Ikea. If only you weren't such a pathetic little puppy for a tattooed piece of jailbait looking tail. We could have really had something. ♥ As it is, enjoy the housewarming. I'll send a fruit basket. I'm sure it'll feel right at home.
As for the well-shod P; now, there's a woman I can admire. Blair Waldorf she may not be, but if I have to trade one ice queen for another, I think P will do. As the saying goes, P, haters gon' hate, and players gon' play; don't let the envy of the de-fanged get you down. As for you, Fangless, I'd suggest a nice day at the spa. The pale look went out while you were sleeping; a day or ten at the beach would do wonders.
I have more news, of course, but there's something to be said for anticipation. Rest easy, Taxon, if I missed you? Your turn's up next. Unless you're not worth talking about, of course. Carry on, caucus with your fellow citizens, and make it work. You know I will! ♥
xoxo~
Gossip Girl
[ooc: IN CASE I FORGET THE SUBJECT LINE all replies from GG will be in text. ALSO GOD I HATE RL, SORRY THIS TOOK FOREVER. I know I missed a lot, but it was just too tl;dr, even for GG. Next blast will be sooner and hit up the gossip I missed.]
So, let's get started, shall we? The news waits for no one, and neither do I.
To start things off with a bang-- and I do mean bang-- we have my favorite Space Slut's latest escapades. First he hops into bed with F (by the way, F; the rack is fantastic, but cover the girls up, sweetie. Whore chic is so last year) much to B's chagrin. She seems to have found revenge is a dish best served 6'4 and well muscled; looks like pretty boy's not-so-little brother has the same way with women. (And I thought the relationships were hard to follow on The Hills.) Two Slayers for Two Brothers, with the rest of their man harem on the side. Don't forget to share, ladies. Bogarting Taxon's finest slices of beefcake can only breed resentment.
But what's this I spy with my little eye? B and JT, sharing stories and apologies, and then making plans for scantily clad fun in the sun. Wife swapping is all well and good, you three, but someone needs to put a ring on it before Valtrex is needed by all involved parties.
...Or maybe I was wrong. A source tells me JT and a new face were spotted swapping stories and a mutual love of leather and chrome. Lock that down, B, or your competition just may be the one wrapping her legs 'round his engines. Tramps like you, baby you were born to run.
Have no fear, Taxon, it doesn't end there; B and pretty boy continued their will they, won't they dance. But this time, it included corsets. Hidden kink or desperation, B? Only time will tell. As for our boy; it seems he drowned his sorrows with F (and some recreation time with S) while a certain less than jolly giant drank alone. Or, he was alone until Little Miss Muffet joined him. If this a sibling rivalry thing, D? Or do you and B share more than genetic material?
And where does this leave poor, lonely R? Well, if my sources are to be believed, avoided by F and lying through his teeth to B. Oh what a tangled web, R. Come clean, why don't you? I hear you and F have the first part of that down to a science, but I could be wrong. Why don't we ask her dirty laundry? And I do mean that literally. If linens could talk... Sorry, B. Looks like you got duped. Better luck next time!
That's enough on that; let's put our finger on the pulse of our newest arrivals. Or lack thereof, as the case may be. IkeaLover9 and his fabulous companions, L and P. One seems more enthused about Ikea's patronage than the other, but I don't concern myself with those power struggles. Our Nordic boy's been all over the map; a man after my own heart. Could it be that I've finally found the perfect man?
...A certain scene kid says no. Sadly, these two make Bert and Ernie's relationship look positively glacial. Oh, Ikea. If only you weren't such a pathetic little puppy for a tattooed piece of jailbait looking tail. We could have really had something. ♥ As it is, enjoy the housewarming. I'll send a fruit basket. I'm sure it'll feel right at home.
As for the well-shod P; now, there's a woman I can admire. Blair Waldorf she may not be, but if I have to trade one ice queen for another, I think P will do. As the saying goes, P, haters gon' hate, and players gon' play; don't let the envy of the de-fanged get you down. As for you, Fangless, I'd suggest a nice day at the spa. The pale look went out while you were sleeping; a day or ten at the beach would do wonders.
I have more news, of course, but there's something to be said for anticipation. Rest easy, Taxon, if I missed you? Your turn's up next. Unless you're not worth talking about, of course. Carry on, caucus with your fellow citizens, and make it work. You know I will! ♥
xoxo~
Gossip Girl
[ooc: IN CASE I FORGET THE SUBJECT LINE all replies from GG will be in text. ALSO GOD I HATE RL, SORRY THIS TOOK FOREVER. I know I missed a lot, but it was just too tl;dr, even for GG. Next blast will be sooner and hit up the gossip I missed.]