003: [Holo/Location: Merlotte's] This ain't a public request, bitches.

[survivor_first]

If you could smell through the Tablets, then damn you'd be smellin' some mighty fine burgers right about now.  Unknowingly, at first, to Lafayette, the Tablet turns on while he's frying food in the kitchen of Merlotte's.  Not that the bar's particularly full of people who have more than half a brain lodged in their heads.  But nonetheless,

Comments

[location: Merlotte's kitchen]

[ohnotespecially]

"Sex-on-legs service?" Sookie asks from the doorway of the kitchen, wearing a highly amused expression after having caught most of Lafayette's little transmission. She's carrying a tray full of mostly empty plates, that she sets down on the nearest available surface, as she walks into the kitchen-proper.

[location: Merlotte's kitchen]

[survivor_first]

"That's what I said, baby," he affirms shamelessly. "People ain't comin' just for the food. Taxon or Bon Temps, you remember what I says about packaging." Or does she? He's not sure, but his point stands either way.

[location: Merlotte's kitchen]

[ohnotespecially]

"Sure I do." She smiles, carrying a couple of the plates over to the sink and glancing playfully at Lafayette over her shoulder as she starts to run the water. "But I'm not wearin' my 'porn star' lipstick today, you think that constitutes false advertisin'?"

[location: Merlotte's kitchen]

[survivor_first]

"What you see is what you get," he states with a dramatic flourish of a pair of tongs, pointing from Sookie's feet to her pretty face. "That work, too. Gotta...ease them Taxon folk into the sexy lush lip look of Sookie Stackhouse."

[location: Merlotte's kitchen]

[ohnotespecially]

"Lafayette, you could charm the birds outta the trees." She laughs, turning the water off to let the plates soak, and reaching for a cloth to dry her hands.

"Seriously though, the people here? You're right, they are weird, it's like... it's like they're empty. Can't hear a single thing from them."

...she knows Tara and Lafayette are used to her 'disability', so she doesn't have to be all secretive about it, like she is with strangers.

[location: Merlotte's kitchen]

[survivor_first]

He sure doesn't argue that, because come on, it's true. But he takes the moment to obnoxiously glare at the particular family over in the booth by the door, who've particularly irked him. "Damn straight. Don't need no mind readin' to see they ain't no single goddamn thought in they coiffed, fake ass heads."

Really, he even tried insulting them, just to get rid of those scary robot smiles and pleasantries. "Whatever, we'll jus' throw Tara at 'em. They'll livin' up real quick."

[location: Merlotte's kitchen]

[ohnotespecially]

"I'll let you do the throwin', if it's all the same to you." She replies, following his gaze over to the family who currently seem to be mouthing words but not actually saying anything. There's a slightly amused expression on her face at the idea of anyone trying to throw Tara, either literally or metaphorically.

"They kinda give me the creeps. At least with vampires or whatever, you know where you stand."

[location: Merlotte's kitchen]

[survivor_first]

"Shoot, I ain't got a problem with that." He did throw her over his shoulder once and took her home. The woman screams and scratches like a cat but it wasn't anything he couldn't handle.

He agrees, in part. They do give him the creeps, but he'd rather be in a room full of them any day than a room full of vampires, these days. "I don't know, Sook. Least these fuckers don't got the brains or the teeth to munch on you like a goddamn cherry pie."

[location: Merlotte's kitchen]

[ohnotespecially]

"True... but they're sorta like zombies, and I've seen Resident Evil. That never ends well." She shudders a little, turning away to stop watching the weird family. Her train of thought then leads oddly to a slightly tangenting place.

"Y'know, if I was a pie, I think I'd be banoffee flavored, anyhow. Or maybe pecan, like Gran used to make." She gives him a mildly challenging look. "How about you?"

[location: Merlotte's kitchen]

[survivor_first]

"Now, I'm surprised you gotta ask," he states in mock seriousness to his friend, the physical embodiment of pecan pie. It's a lighter conversation, and he revels in it. It reeks of old times. Better times.

"Chocolate creme, baby cakes. Maybe a little bit o' cookie crumbs up in there. For some extra...texture." Whatever that means. He allows himself a (if not somewhat slightly dirty) smile.

[location: Merlotte's kitchen]

[ohnotespecially]

She laughs genuinely at his answer, and also at the fact that he managed to make the word 'texture' sound that questionable.

"Mmm, sounds absolutely delicious-- I'd eat me a big slice of that." There's clearly some innuendo there, but that's (one of many) of the beautiful things about Lafayette- she can flirt with him outrageously without it ever getting horribly complicated, like it does with Sam, for example. It's relaxing.

"Hey, maybe we should start sellin' pies? Put it on the menu as a dessert, call it 'The Lafayette'."

[location: Merlotte's kitchen]

[survivor_first]

"You and me both, baby girl. Folk 'round here just don't know how good it is 'til they cuts themselves a big 'ol chunk."

His eyes widen in playfully serious manner, but he's not that good enough to do it without the smile. "Now if that ain't just the goddamn best idea I heard in a long ass time. People is gonna run from all corners of the earth for that shit. Stack it with a dish of Sookie and them aliens better watch they ass."

[location: Merlotte's kitchen]

[ohnotespecially]

That gets another big laugh out of Sookie, before she turns a little contemplative, winding a dishcloth around her wrist idly.

"Y'know, I don't know if I've said this already, but I'm awful glad you're here." A pause as she realizes that has the potential to sound really wrong, before she hastily amends it. "...well, not that you're here, but you know what I mean. Think I was startin' to go a little crazy in this place on my own-- not that the people aren't real nice and everything-- the proper ones, but... you know me, never really been the social type. Havin' you and Tara here is a real blessing."

[location: Merlotte's kitchen]

[survivor_first]

He smiles at her--a genuine, rare smile that, for once, isn't trying to cover up anything underneath. Where would he be if Sookie and Tara weren't here? Probably not only vampire chow, but a big useless puddle of traumatized mess.

"Sook, I have a feelin' you doin' a lot more for me here than I'm doin' for you. Hell, I'd probably be hidin' out under my sheets if you wasn't here."

[location: Merlotte's kitchen]

[ohnotespecially]

She returns that smile, crossing the kitchen to pick up a few glasses from a shelf, touching his arm affectionately as she passes. "I honestly can't even begin to imagine you hidin' from anything-- well, except maybe Sam when you're late for a shift."

She then adds, glancing out to the bar to check if any customers are in need of anything. "...I kinda miss Sam, actually."

[location: Merlotte's kitchen]

[survivor_first]

He holds the little smile, but a little sadly. "You stuck in the past, Sook. There a lot to hide from."

Sam Merlotte. Should be stomping back and forth by now, yelling at Lafayette to get his ass back to work, and gently urging Sookie to do the same, except with googly eyes. "Ain't the same without him, that's for damn sure."