[Voice] with a side of [Location: Speares] The pen is blue

[slasher_slayer]

[Cassie sits out on a park bench, watching the extras mingle, their murmured nonsense faint. Her tablet is in one hand, the stylus in the other. She scribbles in an absentminded fashion, humming some Nine Inch Nails to herself quietly. She taps the tip of the stylus to the outer side of the screen, switching out the colors.]

Comments

[Voice]

[fudgingkillyou]

You too, huh? [Dean CAN'T HELP IT, he even sounds like he's trying not to say it.]

[Voice]

[slasher_slayer]

Seems like it comes with the job.

I mean, I talk like it doesn't bother me, but...it does. A lot.

[There's a faint grunt, like she's trying to fight what she's about to say next.]

I dream about her. A lot.

[fudgingkillyou]

Nah, I know what you mean. I sure as hell don't want to be a demon, especially after-- [alskdf Dean stops dead, because he doesn't want to say that, and there's the sound of Dean spazzing out for a moment before he finishes:] --going through Hell.

[Which can be taken in many different ways, so he thinks he might be safe with that?]

Dream 'bout who?

[slasher_slayer]

You went through Hell? [That wasn't so weird. People go through their own version of hell. But he mentioned becoming a demon.]

[She can't stop herself from answering, but her throat is so tight, she can't help but whisper.]

Nightmares. Of what happened when she came back. Every night it ends with me killing her.

[locked to Cassie]

[fudgingkillyou]

[Damn it Cassie! He'll be quickly locking the message to just Cassie before he blurts out:] Yeah, I went through Hell. You know, in the biblical sense. It sucked, lemme tell you that.

[Facepalm. But Cassie's whisper makes Dean go :\ and his answer probably will not help:]

Sorry, Cassie. Nothing I can do about it.

[Locked like whoa]

[slasher_slayer]

How in the holy fuck did you get out? [She doesn't ask why he went there. All that matters is that he's out.]

There's nothing anyone can do. Hell, I could become an insomniac and never go to sleep again, but I'd end up fucking up and going to sleep anyways.

So I'm stuck with it. Killed the bitch twice and she still fucking haunts me.

[Locked FOREVER]

[fudgingkillyou]

Castiel. He got me out. [Dean does not want to talk about thiiiis.]

Yeah, I get it. Sleep's overrated anyway.

[Locked FOREVER]

[slasher_slayer]

Castiel? I think I met him yesterday. Dark hair? Looks serious all the time?

There's nothing I can do, Dean. Every fucking day, I wake up and I taste blood.

I know it's all in my head, but.... I can't stop it.

[Locked FOREVER]

[fudgingkillyou]

Yeah, him. Angel of the Lord, Broody McBrooderson.

Every night I wake up from dreams about-- [Strangled noise, Dean HATES this conversation, this isn't something he wanted to tell Cassie.] --about being tortured and-- and torturing-- fuck-- people in Hell.

Can't stop it either, fuck, I didn't want to tell you this.

[Locked FOREVER]

[slasher_slayer]

[Cassie chuckles softly.] I think I may call him that, from now on. Broody McBrooderson. Of the Broodsome clan.

Jesus fuck, Dean. [It's not anger in her voice but a sad shock.]

And like I wanted people to know how fucked up I am? How I had no friends before Vlad? How much I fucking miss that big sumbitch?

Christ. I can't shut up.

[Locked FOREVER]

[fudgingkillyou]

Sounds good to me. He'll get pissy about it.

[Dean doesn't answer that part. He doesn't want to talk about it.]

Y'got friends now, Cassie. And neither can I, so don't worry. Whatever the hell comes out of my mouth is gonna come out whether I like it or not.

[Locked FOREVER]

[slasher_slayer]

He can't smite me, can he? I'll throw Pooch in front of him.

And it's fucking weird having friends. I'm used to having, four tops. And that's from saving their goddamn lives. Had no friends in school. This is fucking new and I don't know how to act, Dean.

[Locked FOREVER]

[fudgingkillyou]

Oh, fantastic. I'm not cleaning that up.

Sweetheart, I get that. Hunters don't do friends. Don't have the time, don't have the ability. 'Cept for Sammy, but he's a freak.

Not to get all high school counselor on you, but just act like yourself. Nobody likes a faker.

[Locked FOREVER]

[slasher_slayer]

He's not big. Won't make a huge mess.

I don't know who I am. Freak in school. Slasher slayer afterwards. Look up antisocial in the dictionary and you'll find my face staring up at you.