Blues in E minor for G major strangers
As I sit on a curb smoking new cigarettes from a metal tin I found in a casino, while my questionable girlfriend of two weeks sits inside with her friend, a cigarette I use as an excuse to leave the table for, four days after my 21st, a thought dawns on me.
This last week was a daze. I haven't thought, I haven't done anything. I've ignored life happily. Four days after my 21st I realize already that I've been drinking to ignore life, my problems, and how easy it is. Wine, Russians, beer and whiskey, enough each day to fall asleep in a spin or enough to wake up the next day and be curious about why.
What choices I make based on this observation are important, I take it.
In Vegas I made $800 on $100 playing roulette black and reds, I made $600 off $200 in blackjack being patient and following hands. I lost the roulette money on a streak of red, I lost all but one fifty-cent piece on that blackjack game. I rolled the coin in my hand and watched roulette in the distance as I sipped my wine and practiced arithmetic on a busy color filled green table of face tens. Black. Black. Red. Red. Heads heads tails heads. I borrow $200 from my brother and roll the coin in my hand, extinguish the parliament as I place the money down on red. I aspired for a lucky coin.
Black.
I ordered another drink and reached for a cigarette.
This last week was a daze. I haven't thought, I haven't done anything. I've ignored life happily. Four days after my 21st I realize already that I've been drinking to ignore life, my problems, and how easy it is. Wine, Russians, beer and whiskey, enough each day to fall asleep in a spin or enough to wake up the next day and be curious about why.
What choices I make based on this observation are important, I take it.
In Vegas I made $800 on $100 playing roulette black and reds, I made $600 off $200 in blackjack being patient and following hands. I lost the roulette money on a streak of red, I lost all but one fifty-cent piece on that blackjack game. I rolled the coin in my hand and watched roulette in the distance as I sipped my wine and practiced arithmetic on a busy color filled green table of face tens. Black. Black. Red. Red. Heads heads tails heads. I borrow $200 from my brother and roll the coin in my hand, extinguish the parliament as I place the money down on red. I aspired for a lucky coin.
Black.
I ordered another drink and reached for a cigarette.