WTF!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
why is it that no matter what i do or say someone has to do better or say better or know better than me. example is my last post i say that i may have a job but yet the post on that was for me to get one well if i say i may have a job it means IM GETTING ONE it is like no one thinks that i am trying to get a job and that im not trying when i am out there every fucking day trying to get a job right now i ahve no car, kates car is down, and im taking care of michaela like getting her to the bus in the morning and picking her up later that day but between taking her so the bus and picking her up i am out WALKING ATLEAST 5 MILES to the nearest places and putting in applications but yet im not trying to get a job. another thing that pisses me off is earlier today my father called me and asked why i ahvent called them well you ahve a phone as well as i do, you have my number, every time i call or come over its like im not there or like im annoying you with my calls well dont worry ill try to call more but you can do the same, the call was him saying that i dont call and that i dont talk to my mom online well here is an example last night i was on and i saw she was on now im not one to bug people so i jsut made myself visable and she sat there for 45 minutes and didnt say a word to me yet im not talking to her, so i was told by my father that today i was talking to ym sister and in fact i wasnt even online at the time he was talking about i had just walked in the door and the phone rang but yet i was on line cause my sister says i was, so am i avoiding my family well its kinda yes and kinda no yes because i realize that i have givin them nothing to be proud of and i never will so why bother anymore im nothing special im just more wasted air, and no because i do want to talk to them but i know what its going to be every time i talk to them this will be the convo. hi mom, hi tom, how is work, it sux, how is everyone, they are good... are you working yet, no im still looking it isnt exactly easy to find work, well you should just take any job you can try mcdonalds, well i ahve tried there about 10000000000000000 times and they ahve told me each and every time im over qualified, well try again, its pointless, try somewhere else, i have tried everywhere, there has to be somewhere you havent tried, there isnt. and then she would gop on to tell me abut some moron at her work or something like that and tell me about how much mike has done. well that is why i dont call because that is every convo we have without fail. well there is my rant lets see how much hate mail i get for this one. and no im not trying to hurt anyone and if i did im sorry but this is how i feel and this is how i read the situations in my life.