And with my one last gasping breath I'd apologize for bleeding on your shirt.
Damn, why does it seem like I'm apologizing a lot lately?
Hey Grimm, I took my shit out of your place by the way, I'm back over at Byakuya's if ya ever feel like talking to me again.
Jules, if ya need anything just give me a ring alright?
I ain't getting any closer to breakin' my case wide open either... my luck lately has been nothing but shit.
(private)
Well fuck, it seems like it's been a really long ass time since I've just sat down and typed out what was on my mind.
I was goin' back through my posts today, ya know, for shits and giggles. Holy fucking shit I was long winded back in the day. How the hell did these people put up with me for so long?
Man things have really changed. I actually took the damn time to make my entries back then. Now-a-days I know fuckers can crack this shit and read it. So usually I say fuck it.
Today though... today is different, it's just been too damn long since I've actually used this thing as a fucking journal. Ya know to write what's in your heart and shit?
*sigh* So yeah, here goes.
So... I guess I should probably start with everything surrounding Rukia. I've finally stopped being a complete dumbshit and went to talk to her. I was originally on my way to the bar after having it out with Grimm but...uh, I'll get to that then.
That whole fucking conversation with her could have gone a lot better. But gods I just needed to get shit off my chest. It was one emotional roller coaster, lemme tell ya.
We're together now. That was one good outcome to all of this bullshit I've done. I was scared, I'm not going to lie, but after that night and knowing we'll be together... I feel more confident.
I'm a little iffy about this open relationship thing though. I feel kinda wrong doing this shit to her but...lets face it, I just...don't have the control...yet But she's welcome to do the same anyway. I don't mind.
Grimm, well shit, we were doing fine till I apparently got a stick shoved up my ass. After sittin' and thinkin' about it long and hard I realized how much of a dick I was. He was only lookin' out for me this whole time and I... just...shouldn't have said what I did. He has every right not to fuckin' talk to my ass for a while.
Though...he didn't have to be so cold either. I wonder what's up with him lately. He's been clean and well...acting like, I dunno, a husband. It's weirding me the hell out.
And then there's Byakuya. I don't even fuckin' know what to say to the guy. I mean we haven't spoken since Rukia was in the hospital. Is he really still that fuckin' pissed at me? I'm gonna try to talk to him when he gets home. I feel like shit.
*sigh* Fuck, I have some serious tension I have to release. I just dunno how I wanna go about it. I could call Reborn... this kinda shit shouldn't be taken out on Rukia. Not since we just started ya know? I don't want it to be that way... I'm gonna make love to her... not fuck her.
I just need a serious fuck...er...somethin'...anything.
Guess I could try to ignore it...
...
Tch, yeah right.
Hey Grimm, I took my shit out of your place by the way, I'm back over at Byakuya's if ya ever feel like talking to me again.
Jules, if ya need anything just give me a ring alright?
I ain't getting any closer to breakin' my case wide open either... my luck lately has been nothing but shit.
(private)
Well fuck, it seems like it's been a really long ass time since I've just sat down and typed out what was on my mind.
I was goin' back through my posts today, ya know, for shits and giggles. Holy fucking shit I was long winded back in the day. How the hell did these people put up with me for so long?
Man things have really changed. I actually took the damn time to make my entries back then. Now-a-days I know fuckers can crack this shit and read it. So usually I say fuck it.
Today though... today is different, it's just been too damn long since I've actually used this thing as a fucking journal. Ya know to write what's in your heart and shit?
*sigh* So yeah, here goes.
So... I guess I should probably start with everything surrounding Rukia. I've finally stopped being a complete dumbshit and went to talk to her. I was originally on my way to the bar after having it out with Grimm but...uh, I'll get to that then.
That whole fucking conversation with her could have gone a lot better. But gods I just needed to get shit off my chest. It was one emotional roller coaster, lemme tell ya.
We're together now. That was one good outcome to all of this bullshit I've done. I was scared, I'm not going to lie, but after that night and knowing we'll be together... I feel more confident.
I'm a little iffy about this open relationship thing though. I feel kinda wrong doing this shit to her but...lets face it, I just...don't have the control...yet But she's welcome to do the same anyway. I don't mind.
Grimm, well shit, we were doing fine till I apparently got a stick shoved up my ass. After sittin' and thinkin' about it long and hard I realized how much of a dick I was. He was only lookin' out for me this whole time and I... just...shouldn't have said what I did. He has every right not to fuckin' talk to my ass for a while.
Though...he didn't have to be so cold either. I wonder what's up with him lately. He's been clean and well...acting like, I dunno, a husband. It's weirding me the hell out.
And then there's Byakuya. I don't even fuckin' know what to say to the guy. I mean we haven't spoken since Rukia was in the hospital. Is he really still that fuckin' pissed at me? I'm gonna try to talk to him when he gets home. I feel like shit.
*sigh* Fuck, I have some serious tension I have to release. I just dunno how I wanna go about it. I could call Reborn... this kinda shit shouldn't be taken out on Rukia. Not since we just started ya know? I don't want it to be that way... I'm gonna make love to her... not fuck her.
I just need a serious fuck...er...somethin'...anything.
Guess I could try to ignore it...
...
Tch, yeah right.