Dec 03, 2005 21:43
.... but when will I be able to say that I'm not feeling anymore? Not that I really want to say that, but sometimes it is a little tempting... Maybe I could just go on anti-depressants again, and be numb to the world around me, but at least I'd feel alright about it! No really, I KNOW that's not the answer... if only I knew what was!?! I don't seem to know much right now though... I seem to be blind to the world... My friend think's I'm being played... maybe like a fish hooked on some bait but just dangling there waiting for the fisherwoman to reel me in when it suits her best (perhaps when she's done catching the other fish in the sea?) And everytime I start to loose interest in what I'm nibbling on, there's just enough of a tug on the line to lodge the hook into my cheek...
I really don't want to believe that's true, but I guess at the moment I don't have much else to keep me thinking otherwise...
Except faith... as long as you believe in something, then I guess you can think whatever you want.