(no subject)
I said I'd update later, I guess now's as good a time as any. I'm not really good with journals, when bad stuff happens I can rant, but I have issues with how people read into it. Like if I post all my problems here do people think I'm whining? Meh, that's just me. So I guess I'll talk anyways.
I think that this has pretty much been one of the worst weeks I've had, despite everything awesome like LazerGate and band. Band is keeping me going right now, and people. Tuesdsy started off the bad things. I'm a pretty good writer, the kind of person who can write an entire research paper the night before and pull off a B. I failed my paper that I actually worked really hard on. And I can't blame it on anyone, it was a bad paper I guess. Nobody who read it told me so, but I guess it was. I've never failed a paper in my life, unless I didn't do it, and my mom always gets really mad at me. Had a lovely day of on and off crying, which in a way only made it worse. I mean, it's just a paper, it seems idiotic to cry over it. I'm unpredictable even to myself. I don't know what goes on in my mind.
My dad's not home, he's in new york with my grandma. She had cheimotherapy (sp?) last week and had some kind of reaction to it and went into the hospital. My dad went up this weekend and she was getting better, responding when people talked to her. Yesterday night I called my dad to get a ride home from the game and he was in Hastings because her blood pressure dropped way down. They got it up, but she's unresponsive, just nothing. He's still there, my mom and I both think he should stay. She and I have always been close. I was named after her. So family joke and all, Big Emma, little Emma. Just worried.
I like band. And music in general. It makes sense and it's not complicated. A lot of the time I miss the way things were freshman year. Hardly had friends, didn't do much. Just nice and simple. But then again, friends are great. I don't even know what I want anymore.
I think that this has pretty much been one of the worst weeks I've had, despite everything awesome like LazerGate and band. Band is keeping me going right now, and people. Tuesdsy started off the bad things. I'm a pretty good writer, the kind of person who can write an entire research paper the night before and pull off a B. I failed my paper that I actually worked really hard on. And I can't blame it on anyone, it was a bad paper I guess. Nobody who read it told me so, but I guess it was. I've never failed a paper in my life, unless I didn't do it, and my mom always gets really mad at me. Had a lovely day of on and off crying, which in a way only made it worse. I mean, it's just a paper, it seems idiotic to cry over it. I'm unpredictable even to myself. I don't know what goes on in my mind.
My dad's not home, he's in new york with my grandma. She had cheimotherapy (sp?) last week and had some kind of reaction to it and went into the hospital. My dad went up this weekend and she was getting better, responding when people talked to her. Yesterday night I called my dad to get a ride home from the game and he was in Hastings because her blood pressure dropped way down. They got it up, but she's unresponsive, just nothing. He's still there, my mom and I both think he should stay. She and I have always been close. I was named after her. So family joke and all, Big Emma, little Emma. Just worried.
I like band. And music in general. It makes sense and it's not complicated. A lot of the time I miss the way things were freshman year. Hardly had friends, didn't do much. Just nice and simple. But then again, friends are great. I don't even know what I want anymore.