Drinking....smoking....Drinking.....smoking...Pot? HELL NO! Cigarettes? Wee!

Jul 06, 2002 00:57

I sit here. This desk, this can of coke, this yellow phone, this small bag of Bagel Crisps, which I have polished off, This burp I belch. The box of tissues. (No need of use) And floppy cd's everywhere. I am naked. I sit here and stare. The computer screen. I need to recollect all of what the memory of lastnight's dream meant to me... was it really a dream?

My BMW, Crisp, refreshed. Sits alone, on the concrete, left out from the rest of the cars at the yellow house in Doylestown. All the yellow of the large house, that I tried to forget about, all my dreams and happiness that were once in that house, were betrayed and frustrated with in school days of Wyncote Academy. Held in cuffs to my own silent frustrations. Do I have the right to shout out how strange and cold I began to feel as I walked closer and closer to the front door, Steve Dave and Andrea to my side.... She opens the door and we walk in...............

Leia and Gretchen. Upon the soft grey sofa. Comfortable. Endulging in potato crisps and prezzles. What more could they ask for. Upon the right side. Nervious I feel, He sits. Different. Large. Beautiful. Adorable. and strange, upon the couch. His own secret hiding spot away from the rest of the people. A beer on his arm rest, and a bunch of other things as well. I talk to him... I say hello... we hug... "Dave McCarthy you asshole" was going through my head......

I walked into the kitchen following Steve Dave and Andrea. I spot in the corner of my eye Smirnoff Ice- Delicious, delicate flavor, fills my mouth. my lips, pursue the tingle, the fruity sensation of lemon and malt liquir or heavy on the downfall "Beer" I drank one, walked onto the patio and smoked a clove. Dave asked us to follow him up to the room. The room made me feel quite uncomfortable. As I felt, he and I are only enimies.! Right? Or are we lovers in disguise?

We go to the patio and smoke a cigarette, conversation, and fire... I talk to Leia about Silverchair. Dave is already buzzed. 5 beers does it aye? Iam not buzzed yet. IT took another Smirnoff ice and then a couple yiengling Lagers to do the trick- But I wasn't drunk, just buzzed... Or was I? I kissed Dave outside..... I was happy.. I was sad! I was CONFUSED, FRUSTRATED, LIED TO!

He went upstairs. I went upstairs after him. I knew. I was chasing him. I shouldn't chase him. He told me the whole story. "I like you" Story- Or was it a lie to go to bed? No... He wouldn't do that to me.! Oh dave kiss me I thought. Please! Iam honest- Sitting beside me was the worst experience ever- I was shaking- He told me to sit beside him- Something told me to sit on his lap- So I did-

Later- Back upstairs- He revealed all the rest of the information that was never said in all the years of Wyncote- He finally pointed them out- I loved torturing you at Wyncote cause I loved testing you- Only the lover boys would say to their true stew- Would u like some mashed potatos and gravy with yer soy shishkabob'sboobies? Oi yoi! Iam so crazy for you" DAVE MCCARTHY YOU ASSHOLE!"

Making out.... SHIT I CUT HIS EYEBROW... I drank the blood that was squirting out... He liked it? Was he tickle torturing me? He must have! Because I was punching him in the eye! Please don't tell- We were cuddling, kissing. My tung ring popped out- uh oh! Where did the ball go? Orange.. sphereical med case, full of piercing needles and silver barbells of all shapes and sizes, colors and contours. The bell that Iam wearing now is huge- must fit a 5 gauge bar maybe smaller- Like a two? UH OH! WAS IT IN HIS PENIS BEFORE? EWWW!

Anyway- I didn't leave his house until 4:30- Oh my god- I killed myself over it
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