Interlude: Ups and Downs
Schuldig moved off Brad's lap and sat on the couch next to him. "I don't know why you always get so upset. This happens every time you get a vision in the middle of getting it on."
"I have certain expectations of my dick," Brad answered stiffly, which was about the only thing he was doing stiffly at the moment.
When Brad lost his lovin' feeling that decisively, so did Schuldig. "Doesn't mean you're soft. Heh."
"Schuldig."
"Ja, ja, Herr Humorless. At least you didn't get it while we were really into it. That's even more frustrating." Having a guy go soft inside you felt insulting even when you knew it wasn't your or his fault. "Sooo, what's the damage?"
"Mr. Jones is going to do something exceedingly stupid tomorrow."
"Like you needed a vision for that? The man's such a stupid twat."
"Agreed. If he weren't such a rich stupid twat I'd leave him to die of his own stupidity. I may well do so soon anyway."
"Hmm." Schuldig wondered whether he should button his shirt and zip up his fly. Sometimes Brad had a quick comeback after his brain and nervous system settled down.
"Schu, I want you to go with me to see one of the doctors Nagi has working on psionics. It strikes me that we're getting on in years and should be doing preventative maintenance. Your diet is horrible."
This was what had been eating at Brad on and off for the last few days? "My diet is tasty. Besides, junk lasts longer in my pockets, and I have no talent for cooking."
"That apple pie you made for Thanksgiving was excellent."
"None of my neighbors do healthy cooking. The grandmother I picked my pie talent up from is a great baker but cooks her veggies to mush. Most of the rest make everything out of cans and boxes like I do. I've asked you to hire a gourmet chef in the past but you cited security risks."
"Which still exist."
"I'm still kicking myself for encouraging Aya-kitty to go back to and make up with his team. He's a great cook."
"I'm tempted to kick you for that myself. Kryptonbrand will never utilize his telepathy as well as we could."
"What's brought on the worries about our mortality? You haven't hit your 40s yet."
"I'm 39, so I will soon. Schu, I'm just planning ahead. The precogs who survive to reach my age start going blind about now, depending on the strength of their talent. Their eyes and retinas tend to be fine, but the neural parts of the equation wear out. While you, you're--"
"One of the oldest nearly sane telepaths living in captivity?"
"Something like. I'm sure there are supplements we can take to encourage brain and neural health."
"I hate supplements, and they're expensive. Can't we just pay tens of thousands of euros to a healer every few years instead? At least there you get quantifiable results."
"Schuldig."
"All right. I'll talk to the doc and let him do tests... as long as they're not invasive or a pain in the ass."
"Since that's a dealbreaker for me too, I have no problem with that."
"Good."
"Fine." Brad started to stroke Schuldig's hair, and Schuldig felt Brad start to get in the mood again, which got him in the mood again. "You've been looking like a cat in cream lately. New toy, new lover, or both?"
Schuldig grinned. "You're gonna flip out when you hear."
"I've given up on the idea that you do these things just to piss me off, because if you did you'd tell me immediately."
"It'd be pathetic if I did everything just to get a reaction out of you. I do it for my own pleasure, and if it annoys you that's a cool side effect. You know how I went to another reality to toss Farfie's mortal remains at the pope? Well, I've been going back to see how my funereal performance art went over, and the Farfie there found me. We'd got on really well, so now we're kind of dating."
Brad sighed. "I'm sure you know how unhealthy this sounds."
"You're not the first person to say so, but he's not exactly the same Farfarello."
"Are you going to go from reality to reality collecting them all?"
"It's really not like that. He adores me and we have pet names for each other, though most of his for me have something to do with Satan. He's 24, redheaded, kind of bouncy, and really cute."
"Cute." Disbelief dripped from the word but then Schuldig sent him a mental image. "He is. I'll be damned."
"Probably."
"Am I going to meet this cute Farfarello?"
"He's really enjoying the religious situation in his home reality right now--"
"How many people has he gotten you to kill for free?"
"--but maybe yes in the future. I dunno, Brad, it's not like I'm counting when I'm with him. We do more than just kill or fuck. He takes me out dancing or for dinner too."
"I'm happily coming up blank for mental images on that."
"It's different. He's different. He doesn't throw electricity; he just fights, doesn't feel pain, and probably confounds precogs."
"I'm not going to recruit him. Bringing our Farfarello back in turned out to be a bad decision that unbalanced the team. I wouldn't consider trying it again unless I'd looked into it carefully and decided that it wouldn't cause a personality conflict."
That was a major concession Brad had just made, so Schuldig had to say, "I find it really sexy when a guy can admit he made a mistake."
"Oh, really?" Brad just about purred.
"We're pretty old for our kind, we're still pretty and very sexy, we're rich, we're still in possession of all of our senses, and we still get it on like horny teenagers. I'd say we're doing well for ourselves."
"And we're going to stay that way." Brad's smirk looked a bit less smirky when he didn't have his glasses on, but he also looked sexy in a different way. When Brad grabbed him and kissed him soundly as he pushed him down onto the couch, rubbing insistently against him, Schu sighed happily. This was how it should be.
"I have certain expectations of my dick," Brad answered stiffly, which was about the only thing he was doing stiffly at the moment.
When Brad lost his lovin' feeling that decisively, so did Schuldig. "Doesn't mean you're soft. Heh."
"Schuldig."
"Ja, ja, Herr Humorless. At least you didn't get it while we were really into it. That's even more frustrating." Having a guy go soft inside you felt insulting even when you knew it wasn't your or his fault. "Sooo, what's the damage?"
"Mr. Jones is going to do something exceedingly stupid tomorrow."
"Like you needed a vision for that? The man's such a stupid twat."
"Agreed. If he weren't such a rich stupid twat I'd leave him to die of his own stupidity. I may well do so soon anyway."
"Hmm." Schuldig wondered whether he should button his shirt and zip up his fly. Sometimes Brad had a quick comeback after his brain and nervous system settled down.
"Schu, I want you to go with me to see one of the doctors Nagi has working on psionics. It strikes me that we're getting on in years and should be doing preventative maintenance. Your diet is horrible."
This was what had been eating at Brad on and off for the last few days? "My diet is tasty. Besides, junk lasts longer in my pockets, and I have no talent for cooking."
"That apple pie you made for Thanksgiving was excellent."
"None of my neighbors do healthy cooking. The grandmother I picked my pie talent up from is a great baker but cooks her veggies to mush. Most of the rest make everything out of cans and boxes like I do. I've asked you to hire a gourmet chef in the past but you cited security risks."
"Which still exist."
"I'm still kicking myself for encouraging Aya-kitty to go back to and make up with his team. He's a great cook."
"I'm tempted to kick you for that myself. Kryptonbrand will never utilize his telepathy as well as we could."
"What's brought on the worries about our mortality? You haven't hit your 40s yet."
"I'm 39, so I will soon. Schu, I'm just planning ahead. The precogs who survive to reach my age start going blind about now, depending on the strength of their talent. Their eyes and retinas tend to be fine, but the neural parts of the equation wear out. While you, you're--"
"One of the oldest nearly sane telepaths living in captivity?"
"Something like. I'm sure there are supplements we can take to encourage brain and neural health."
"I hate supplements, and they're expensive. Can't we just pay tens of thousands of euros to a healer every few years instead? At least there you get quantifiable results."
"Schuldig."
"All right. I'll talk to the doc and let him do tests... as long as they're not invasive or a pain in the ass."
"Since that's a dealbreaker for me too, I have no problem with that."
"Good."
"Fine." Brad started to stroke Schuldig's hair, and Schuldig felt Brad start to get in the mood again, which got him in the mood again. "You've been looking like a cat in cream lately. New toy, new lover, or both?"
Schuldig grinned. "You're gonna flip out when you hear."
"I've given up on the idea that you do these things just to piss me off, because if you did you'd tell me immediately."
"It'd be pathetic if I did everything just to get a reaction out of you. I do it for my own pleasure, and if it annoys you that's a cool side effect. You know how I went to another reality to toss Farfie's mortal remains at the pope? Well, I've been going back to see how my funereal performance art went over, and the Farfie there found me. We'd got on really well, so now we're kind of dating."
Brad sighed. "I'm sure you know how unhealthy this sounds."
"You're not the first person to say so, but he's not exactly the same Farfarello."
"Are you going to go from reality to reality collecting them all?"
"It's really not like that. He adores me and we have pet names for each other, though most of his for me have something to do with Satan. He's 24, redheaded, kind of bouncy, and really cute."
"Cute." Disbelief dripped from the word but then Schuldig sent him a mental image. "He is. I'll be damned."
"Probably."
"Am I going to meet this cute Farfarello?"
"He's really enjoying the religious situation in his home reality right now--"
"How many people has he gotten you to kill for free?"
"--but maybe yes in the future. I dunno, Brad, it's not like I'm counting when I'm with him. We do more than just kill or fuck. He takes me out dancing or for dinner too."
"I'm happily coming up blank for mental images on that."
"It's different. He's different. He doesn't throw electricity; he just fights, doesn't feel pain, and probably confounds precogs."
"I'm not going to recruit him. Bringing our Farfarello back in turned out to be a bad decision that unbalanced the team. I wouldn't consider trying it again unless I'd looked into it carefully and decided that it wouldn't cause a personality conflict."
That was a major concession Brad had just made, so Schuldig had to say, "I find it really sexy when a guy can admit he made a mistake."
"Oh, really?" Brad just about purred.
"We're pretty old for our kind, we're still pretty and very sexy, we're rich, we're still in possession of all of our senses, and we still get it on like horny teenagers. I'd say we're doing well for ourselves."
"And we're going to stay that way." Brad's smirk looked a bit less smirky when he didn't have his glasses on, but he also looked sexy in a different way. When Brad grabbed him and kissed him soundly as he pushed him down onto the couch, rubbing insistently against him, Schu sighed happily. This was how it should be.