without it all i'm choking on nothing it's clear in my head & i'm screaming for something
well i'm sick of everything. i don't feel any better then i did friday. macy has lime disease. woke up to that on saturday morning cause she couldn't walk. my baby. my poor baby. why does this shit ahppen to the people around me and never me?> i'm the one who deserves it.
austin came over last night, my little bit of happiness. the ONLY sanity i have. i love him so much. but even then i still feel sad. cause i know he has to leave. i wish i could just live with him, make things easier for me. it's like he leaves and it's like an awful pain comes over me, reality hits and life sucks again. he truely is wonderful, for putting up with my family, just a few hours to see me.and putting up with me... wow... he's that fucking good. everything about him is amazing... EVERYTHING. let me tell ya ;) i don't deserve him, at all. he could do so much better. why does he love me so much?
i'm choking on nothing, it's cear in my head and i'm screaming for something
i still feel the need to not wake up in the morning, to not exhist and be 6 feet under. i have my reasons.
austin came over last night, my little bit of happiness. the ONLY sanity i have. i love him so much. but even then i still feel sad. cause i know he has to leave. i wish i could just live with him, make things easier for me. it's like he leaves and it's like an awful pain comes over me, reality hits and life sucks again. he truely is wonderful, for putting up with my family, just a few hours to see me.and putting up with me... wow... he's that fucking good. everything about him is amazing... EVERYTHING. let me tell ya ;) i don't deserve him, at all. he could do so much better. why does he love me so much?
i'm choking on nothing, it's cear in my head and i'm screaming for something
i still feel the need to not wake up in the morning, to not exhist and be 6 feet under. i have my reasons.