guess who is alive? meeeee.
Journalling and stuff is so dead these days, hahaha. As always I'm hanging out on Plurk, so for people here who want to see me more beyond very sparse updates feel free to friend me on 
knightblazer.
ANYWAY. Inspired by one of my friends, I will be doing an age meme tl;dr ahead, so be warned.
Ten years ago (2003, age 11), I:
knightblazer.
ANYWAY. Inspired by one of my friends, I will be doing an age meme tl;dr ahead, so be warned.
Ten years ago (2003, age 11), I:
- Was in Primary 5 and trying to find a balance within myself. I was a terrible person in the year before that, having played truant and everything so things with me are... shaky, to put it simply. Even then I didn't have much of friends, and the days just consisted of me trying to live my life through and attempting to accomplish Primary school.
- Was under some very bad influence from a friend I had once considered to be my best friend. I didn't realize that then of course, but in the next year she would reveal herself and then backstab me in the most painful way possible. Until now I still hold the scars from that - not the physical ones, of course, but because of this I've found it hard to trust people I call friends until, you know, they show that they are good people to me.
- Finished secondary school. Massively glad for it too, because I pretty much spent my time there getting bullied and there are very little good memories for me there. I didn't care so much for my grades, because all I really wanted was to get the fuck out of there.
- Discovered LJRP! Which of course is one of the best decisions of my life, in a way. For the first time I found people I could be with, and feel comfortable around, and it was--well, amazing, really. I don't think I've ever been happier then.
- My beloved aunt who I was close to passed away. I was in a massive, massive slump from that, and at one point I did get depressed. I had to pull myself back together eventually though, and then go on to finish school. Which I did, so I am glad for that, as said earlier.
- Found an amazing group of people through NaNoWriMo. They're some of my really good friends now, and in our first meeting each of us talked about our darker days, so there are no real secrets between us. We know our dark histories, all of us, and that openness made us close from the start, I think. All of us are pretty far from the norm and we know it, and we take solace in that knowledge. Its been fun with them, and I really hope our bond can continue through the ages.
- Graduated from ITE's talent programe! Which is an awesome accomplishment, because I didn't think I would have been able to even get in at all, let alone finish it. I also got another plague for a student award, so that was cool as well.
- Won several other awards in school, which like earlier was something I did expect. What I accomplished in ITE was so much more than anything I've ever done in my previous times anywhere else, and I am proud of myself for that. For doing it and proving to myself that I can do it as long as its on my list to do. That I'm not the slobbering failure other people think I am.
- Went to USA for the first time in my life! And with the school too, so I wasn't with any family and it was for three weeks so I had to learn how to ration the money I had, which I managed. Mostly lived on Walmart and kindness of the other people I've met there (including Levi), and when everything was done I really had a great time. The whole trip is here if you want thw details.
- ALSO went to the Philippines and met Kae! And got to stay with her for about a week, which is also cool and I had tons of fun. One of my wishes is to be able to return there again - this time with my own money.
- Grandmother passed away, which was a sad and painful time for everyone involved. Stopped writing after a year of getting into it because of this, mostly, and also since I wanted to focus back on ITE proper. Doubly so since I stopped LJRP the year before too, so I could put all my energies into it.
- Got back into RP due to Michele. It's been a blast so far, and I hope it continues. ♥
- Graduated from ITE as second in my course, which was really an achievement for me. I'm of course, a bit sad that I got beat out of first by 0.03 GPA, but that's just how life goes. I'm just happy enough that I managed to do it and prove to people that I'm more than the failure I was before.
- Got enrolled back into SP! Which was amazing because yes, I have managed to pull myself back from my own failures! It's amazing, too, and I'm proud of myself for having accomplished that.
- Survived through the first term, which is something too because there was so many things to do and I hadn't expected it, god. But I managed, and I did decently so I'm not going to complain.
- Discovered just how homophobic and uncomfortable mom is with my gender identity. While I'm not trans*, I'm still quite a tomboy and proud of it, which my mom doesn't like so she finally let it all come out when I told her of my intention to shave my hair off for charity. Usually I'm alright with it, but this time she said a hell lot of hurtful things, which I just can't just so easily forgive like before. Because of that I've started to look around for a part time job, just to show her that I can do things if I want to, I just choose not to because I have more important things. All she sees me, apparently, is a burden who eats her money because I'm not working now.
- Went to Pink Dot for the first time with my friends! For those not in the know, Pink Dot is basically a yearly event in Singapore where people come together to support the rights of the LGBT community in Singapore and show them that they have the freedom to love whoever they chose to. It was an amazing thing, and I'm definitely going for next years one too.
- Hung out with friends after the event and planned our ten year plan to rent an apartment and live together, away from our parents. We love them, but none of us can live with them and we think it would work, moving in together. It's a pretty feasible idea really.
- Will try to do a bit more schoolwork! I've done a fair bit this week, but doing more never hurts.
- Accomplish tags and stuff, yes. After brunch with friends.
- Attempt to sleep at a reasonable time.
- SCHOOL.
- Do more schoolwork.
- Ask classmate about the job thing she said she would ask over the weekend and hope it will pan out as hoped.
- Be in my second year, hopefully. Things are going well, and I do hope it will stay that way. I can't fail again, after all, so I will have to do my best and keep at it.
- Have some sort of job, hopefully. So that my mom can't complain and I will have income of my own and then I can buy my own stuff without worry.
- Still have the friends that I do now.
- Have a stable job and income! I don't have any proper plans for uni, considering its price, so I think a job will probably be better and I can always go to uni at a later date once I actually have the cash for it.
- Have done my dream game testing job! It won't be long term, for sure, but I hope to have done it because it's still something I've always wanted to do. I want to try it at least once, so that I have had my taste and if I don't like it, at least had the fulfillment of ticking it off my bucket list.
- Maybe have gone to another country by myself? My hope is UK, where I can meet my tombro and spend loads of awesome times with her, so here's keeping my hopes up.
- Actually have a place of my own, away from my mother. I love her, really, but if I want to actually have a good relationship with her I need to be away from her and have my own space.
- Have written a book, at least. Not sure if this will pan out or if it can happen, but I do at least want to write a book. It doesn't have to do amazingly well, but I at least want to do it so I can tick it off my bucket list.
- Possibly make a game of sorts? It might not happen, but it would be cool if this did happen. Who knows what the future will bring, right?
- Most of all, be happy at that point. I sincerely hope I will be.