another skirmish
I have won yet another skirmish in the battle to take back my House from the creeping clutter and crap that threaten to overwhelm me.
Well, actually, I'm already overwhelmed, but I'm staging a Resistance Effort, and I will throw the invaders out... in some cases literally. In others, repatriation or exile. In still others, internment camps new housing. All participants will have a home. Those who refuse to take their loyalty oath to the smooth running of House will be exiled. Those who cannot participate in the new regime will be euthanized and sent away with Trash Truck.
Tonight it was a skirmish in Laundry. I think that this will continue to be an area of unrest, because just as I get one area pacified, another rears its stinky head and needs attention. While my back is turned, the first area goes nutso again, and brings a friend. And it grows like kudzu, all over House.
I have a multi-pronged approach to this theater, which will assist in the repatriation of some of the combatants, and the containment of others. The first avenue of approach is new (to me) housing for the combatants. This housing area will be called Dressers. The current housing areas are ugly, and more importantly, inadequate to their task. They may also be full of retired combatants that need expulsion from House; that will be determined when I send in my scouts. I plan to find pre-fab housing that is more suitable to the task at hand. One of the Dresser housing areas has already been repurposed to hold members of the Fabric Stash clan, and they all seem to be quite content living there.
The second avenue, when I have successfully contained, neutralized, and reeducated the Laundry combatants in the bedroom, will be a temporary refugee camp, code-named Hamper, in the corner of Bedroom, in which combatants will be held until such time as they can be taken to Cellar, neutralized, and re-educated.
This neutralizing and re-education process is done using a process called WDF, which stands for Wash-Dry-Fold. It's very effective in the short term, but recidivism is a problem. Decades -- nay, centuries of research have failed to result in more effective means of maintaining long-term results, though some nudist colonies have reported a near stalemate in the Laundry theater. Their struggle against the Laundry insurgents is taken over by a similar ideological conflict with Upholstery, however, so it's a trade-off I'm not willing to make. (Be glad... taking that avenue of approach to Laundry can be traumatizing for everyone.)
The Laundry insurgents, once they've been through the WDF process, will be sorted for repatriation in the Dresser and Closet housing areas, exile to Thrift Shop, or euthanasia due to irreparable combat damage. It is my hope that few of the combatants will require euthanasia, but losses by the Socks tribe have been heavy. Replacement troops have been seen in Laundry, however, so it would seem that the tribe is strong and healthy.
Lest these plans seem like the ravings of a despot, let me assure you that I am a benevolent dictator, and want only the best for the citizens of Laundry. Their housing at the moment is wholly inadequate, given that they are currently staying in Cellar, which is an unhealthy place for them to live. I want them to come back to the Province of Upstairs, where they can be given appropriate quarters in the hope that we can peacefully co-exist. It is my hope that with this effort, they and I will have happier, easier encounters in the future and keep the WDF treatments to small groups, rather than the large, wholesale actions that I've had to take thus far.
I'm planning an assault on Dishes and Living Room tomorrow...
Well, actually, I'm already overwhelmed, but I'm staging a Resistance Effort, and I will throw the invaders out... in some cases literally. In others, repatriation or exile. In still others, internment camps new housing. All participants will have a home. Those who refuse to take their loyalty oath to the smooth running of House will be exiled. Those who cannot participate in the new regime will be euthanized and sent away with Trash Truck.
Tonight it was a skirmish in Laundry. I think that this will continue to be an area of unrest, because just as I get one area pacified, another rears its stinky head and needs attention. While my back is turned, the first area goes nutso again, and brings a friend. And it grows like kudzu, all over House.
I have a multi-pronged approach to this theater, which will assist in the repatriation of some of the combatants, and the containment of others. The first avenue of approach is new (to me) housing for the combatants. This housing area will be called Dressers. The current housing areas are ugly, and more importantly, inadequate to their task. They may also be full of retired combatants that need expulsion from House; that will be determined when I send in my scouts. I plan to find pre-fab housing that is more suitable to the task at hand. One of the Dresser housing areas has already been repurposed to hold members of the Fabric Stash clan, and they all seem to be quite content living there.
The second avenue, when I have successfully contained, neutralized, and reeducated the Laundry combatants in the bedroom, will be a temporary refugee camp, code-named Hamper, in the corner of Bedroom, in which combatants will be held until such time as they can be taken to Cellar, neutralized, and re-educated.
This neutralizing and re-education process is done using a process called WDF, which stands for Wash-Dry-Fold. It's very effective in the short term, but recidivism is a problem. Decades -- nay, centuries of research have failed to result in more effective means of maintaining long-term results, though some nudist colonies have reported a near stalemate in the Laundry theater. Their struggle against the Laundry insurgents is taken over by a similar ideological conflict with Upholstery, however, so it's a trade-off I'm not willing to make. (Be glad... taking that avenue of approach to Laundry can be traumatizing for everyone.)
The Laundry insurgents, once they've been through the WDF process, will be sorted for repatriation in the Dresser and Closet housing areas, exile to Thrift Shop, or euthanasia due to irreparable combat damage. It is my hope that few of the combatants will require euthanasia, but losses by the Socks tribe have been heavy. Replacement troops have been seen in Laundry, however, so it would seem that the tribe is strong and healthy.
Lest these plans seem like the ravings of a despot, let me assure you that I am a benevolent dictator, and want only the best for the citizens of Laundry. Their housing at the moment is wholly inadequate, given that they are currently staying in Cellar, which is an unhealthy place for them to live. I want them to come back to the Province of Upstairs, where they can be given appropriate quarters in the hope that we can peacefully co-exist. It is my hope that with this effort, they and I will have happier, easier encounters in the future and keep the WDF treatments to small groups, rather than the large, wholesale actions that I've had to take thus far.
I'm planning an assault on Dishes and Living Room tomorrow...