My Trip with Drunk Guys in Vegas
So my trip to the West Coast was fun and involved crazy travel. Went on a job interview. Saw my sister graduate college - yea Loni! Went to Disneyland with my mom and two sisters, we haven't done anything like that in many years. I LOVE DISNEYLAND! Especially the Tiki Room. It's my favorite. I could totally live there.
Ran off to Vegas. My friends and I partied and then went to a friend's wedding up in the mountains. Beautiful setting. You know, Vegas really makes a girl feel wanted. Since basically every guy there is looking to get laid, the average number of hit-ons a girl gets is really quite staggering. I didn't actually keep track, although now I kinda wish I had. Aside from the normal guys and the drunk guys, here were my four favorite (oh my gods did that just happen) come-ons in no particular order .
1. I'm riding up to my hotel room alone at about 4am after leaving my friends at a club to continue partying. Three guys get on the elevator with me. They realize they’re on the wrong elevator, and even though I’m going up to the top floor, they decide to keep riding with me all the way up. They’re nonchalantly checking me out and exchanging looks between themselves. Finally the one closest to me (and the cutest I might add) asks where I’m from.
“LA”
“No, I mean are you Middle Eastern?”
“Yeah, my family is Israeli. What about you?”
All three guys in the elevator stop. I mean literally, they all did a sharp inhale and stopped moving for a moment. The air is palpable with tension and I have no idea what the hell is going on.
He pauses for a moment and looks at me. “I’m from Palestine.” He pauses again “So we’re kind of like brothers.”
“Yeah, we’re pretty close.” I answer.
Now the tension is broken and they all look relieved. As I get off the elevator he asks where I’m going. I laugh and say I’m going to bed. Apparently the guy was so relieved that instead of having a mini political explosion with me, he asks if I need any company.
2. The nasty, 50+, rich and incredibly slimy middle eastern guy I walk past on a moving walkway. He drops back to stare at my ass, then quickly comes to catch up with me and say hello. I pretend like I don't hear him and walk faster. He walks faster. I stop and he ends up passing me. He keeps turning and staring at me until he reaches the end, and then waits for me. As I walk past him again I hear "Hey baby, how are you? What are you doing tonight?". I turn, politely say I'm not interested, and continue on my way. He follows me through the casino trying to talk to me. "Why don't you spend some time with me? You're very pretty girl.....blah blah blah." After he continues to follow me for at least two room lengths in the casino I turn around, look exasperated, shake my head no and kind of run off. He finally leaves. But he may have been stalking me a little because 5 minutes later I run into him again. "Hey baby, let me buy you a drink. Spend some time with me." I again state that I'm not interested and the brilliant man finally takes the hint.
3. So you know the guys who stand on the street clicking cards to get your attention so they can give you porn ads? This guy was one of those. He's wearing a neon yellow shirt that says "Girls Direct to Your Door in 20 Min". He tries to shove his porn ads into my hand, then moves in front of me, smiles, says "Hey baby" and begins to hit on me in Spanish. The only words I understood were chula and mi casa.
4. My friend and I are walking up the stairs and into a club. Two guys pass us going down the stairs and out of the club. They stop. They stare. They say, in a voice that would make Joey Tribbiani from Friends proud "Hey ladies, how you doin?"
Ran off to Vegas. My friends and I partied and then went to a friend's wedding up in the mountains. Beautiful setting. You know, Vegas really makes a girl feel wanted. Since basically every guy there is looking to get laid, the average number of hit-ons a girl gets is really quite staggering. I didn't actually keep track, although now I kinda wish I had. Aside from the normal guys and the drunk guys, here were my four favorite (oh my gods did that just happen) come-ons in no particular order .
1. I'm riding up to my hotel room alone at about 4am after leaving my friends at a club to continue partying. Three guys get on the elevator with me. They realize they’re on the wrong elevator, and even though I’m going up to the top floor, they decide to keep riding with me all the way up. They’re nonchalantly checking me out and exchanging looks between themselves. Finally the one closest to me (and the cutest I might add) asks where I’m from.
“LA”
“No, I mean are you Middle Eastern?”
“Yeah, my family is Israeli. What about you?”
All three guys in the elevator stop. I mean literally, they all did a sharp inhale and stopped moving for a moment. The air is palpable with tension and I have no idea what the hell is going on.
He pauses for a moment and looks at me. “I’m from Palestine.” He pauses again “So we’re kind of like brothers.”
“Yeah, we’re pretty close.” I answer.
Now the tension is broken and they all look relieved. As I get off the elevator he asks where I’m going. I laugh and say I’m going to bed. Apparently the guy was so relieved that instead of having a mini political explosion with me, he asks if I need any company.
2. The nasty, 50+, rich and incredibly slimy middle eastern guy I walk past on a moving walkway. He drops back to stare at my ass, then quickly comes to catch up with me and say hello. I pretend like I don't hear him and walk faster. He walks faster. I stop and he ends up passing me. He keeps turning and staring at me until he reaches the end, and then waits for me. As I walk past him again I hear "Hey baby, how are you? What are you doing tonight?". I turn, politely say I'm not interested, and continue on my way. He follows me through the casino trying to talk to me. "Why don't you spend some time with me? You're very pretty girl.....blah blah blah." After he continues to follow me for at least two room lengths in the casino I turn around, look exasperated, shake my head no and kind of run off. He finally leaves. But he may have been stalking me a little because 5 minutes later I run into him again. "Hey baby, let me buy you a drink. Spend some time with me." I again state that I'm not interested and the brilliant man finally takes the hint.
3. So you know the guys who stand on the street clicking cards to get your attention so they can give you porn ads? This guy was one of those. He's wearing a neon yellow shirt that says "Girls Direct to Your Door in 20 Min". He tries to shove his porn ads into my hand, then moves in front of me, smiles, says "Hey baby" and begins to hit on me in Spanish. The only words I understood were chula and mi casa.
4. My friend and I are walking up the stairs and into a club. Two guys pass us going down the stairs and out of the club. They stop. They stare. They say, in a voice that would make Joey Tribbiani from Friends proud "Hey ladies, how you doin?"