[NSFW] musesandlyrics | 6.26 James Morrison lyrics
6.26. 'Cause you give me something
That makes me scared, alright
This could be nothing
But I'm willing to give it a try
Please give me something
'Cause someday I might know my heart
Give Me Something - James Morrison
Co-written with doctordefib
[Follows THIS]
Ryan stretched and scraped his nails through his hair as he came back up the hall of his apartment yet again. He let out a rough, helpless sigh and came to stand in front of Iain, who was sitting comfortably on the sofa flicking through the Sky TV channels. He couldn't help but be amused how easily the Scot had made himself at home and looked like he was a regular part of the furniture. Ryan was relieved, he had been worried and feeling guilty about forcing the guy into a corner for his help. He had managed to get Hayden and himself cleaned up, then Hayden tucked into bed with a bucket and some lemonade. He had a definite fever, and kept complaining of a sore tummy and sore head, but after a quick checkover, Ryan was able to placate himself that his son didn't have appendicitis or anything more serious like that. There were no funky rashes, no warning aches in the back or neck, no unusual pains elsewhere. Kids picked up bugs all the time, this one just had the worst timing ever. By the time Ryan had gotten back out to his unexpected houseguest, Iain had cleaned up himself and changed into the well-worn trackpants Ryan had managed to dig out of his closet. He hadn't realised how much his laundry had backed-up and he didn't want to give the guy anything that wasn't washed. He had made himself at home and they finally had a chance to sit down and have a bit of a chat over a cup of tea, real English tea something Ryan had well come to love since moving to London. Often, it was more cathartic than alcohol. It wasn't long lasting, though, three times Hayden had called out for his Dad with three more bouts of vomiting. Ryan just sat with him, holding his head and rubbing his back until it passed and he dozed off again. After the third time, Ryan was started to feel sleepy himself and he was sure his hallway now had track marks from the amount of times he had walked up and down it not only when Hayden called, but now and again in between to check on him.
He pointed to the kitchen of the open-plan apartment with an apologetic smile. "I'm going be slightly reckless and indulge in a beer. Do you want one? I need something to give me a kick of stamina. On the upside, I think he's maybe finally spewed himself empty, so I might be able to stick in one place for a little longer. Until the diarrhoea kicks in, which is probably inevitable according to what the school teacher told me when I called her. It's going around and sticks for a few days..." He scratched at his head with his thumb and then moved to the kitchen, glad for the open-plan so he could continue the conversation. "And as much as I hate to say this because I already feel terrible you got dragged into this less-than-pleasant chaos, but I hope you have a good immune system."
Iain had been fine, amusing himself with the TV remote while Ryan took care of Hayden. He really hadn't felt like he was being kept waiting, the only thing making him slightly hesitant had been if he was actually intruding on the father-son time, but Ryan seemed happy to keep trying to talk to him in between the emergency calls. He stopped flicking, letting the TV stay on a channel featuring some cartoon, or other, and turned his head to watch Ryan. "Sure, a beer would be great. And really, it's nay bother. Like I said, four younger brothers. Isane anything a boy can produce that I havenae seen before. Still amazes me such a little kid can hold so much vomit. I hope the diarrhoea at least doesnae come for a couple hours. He seems like a good kid, I'm sorry he's been hit so hard. That you both have. You're nay such a bad boy yourself," he added with a slight smirk. "And my immune system is just fine."
Ryan was trying to hold the fridge door open with his butt while he dug around in the bottom of the fridge to tear the new six pack open. Another thing he hadn't managed to get around to. The hinge on the fridge was loose, or something, and it made the fucker keep closing when you were trying to get something out of it. It had resulted in Hayden spilling red cordial all over the floor before school one morning when the door caught him in the back by surprise. "Tell me about it. Still, not such a foreign concept to me. Spent many a day up to my elbows in vomit, diarrhoea, pus, mucus... you name it. Sorry if you're squeamish," he added with a smirk of his own as he got the beers free and elbowed the fridge door closed. He brought them over and sunk down into the seat beside Iain with a deep, long sigh of relief, letting his head rest back against it. He handed one of the bottles to Iain and then twisted the lid off his. "Pfft, I'm shattered. Today has felt like it's lasted a week. I didn't even know there was this mini epidemic going around the school. Some father I am. I might've been able to plan a bit better if I had known... not completely sure how, though. Luck hasn't been much on my side of late." He held his bottle up. "Cheers, man. For everything."
"My younger brothers wouldnae have ever let me get away with being squeamish. Five boys in one family... cannae even imagine what it would have been like with nay vomit, diarrhoea, pus, mucus, or anything else you can think of. You didnae ever say what it was you did. Just that it was hard with your wee lad to juggle him and work. I'm going to hazard a guess at something medical." He took the beer gratefully, almost feeling sympathetic stress from watching Ryan all this time. "Cheers, mate. And dinnae worry, it's been my pleasure. I just hope you get something good out of today. Dinnae like the days that nay give me anything good to remember them for. They really are the ones that feel like a week crammed into a day."
Ryan swallowed the mouthful of beer and then licked his lips with a small laugh. "Well, there was a three minute wank this morning before I got up. That wasn't too bad. Then it all sort of went down hill from there. Though, on the upside, I've never really had a knight in shining, er, Adidas trackpants before," he said in amusement, pointing to the pants Iain was wearing with his beer, "so I'm really not entitled to claim the whole day as being shit. Even this, I can't remember the last time I sat and had a beer with someone that wasn't my secretary or my kid's grandfather. Which is extremely pathetic to admit, but welcome to my life. I'm a doctor, a trauma specialist to be exact. Just, these days, I don't have much hands on patient contact. I took a position at a private hospital in London to give me more time with Hay. Head of ICU. It keeps me on my toes, but then, it can't possibly throw more shit at me than the military did, so it's all good. Mostly. Just don't have time to scratch myself."
Iain couldn't help but smile impishly. "Unless it's the three minute wank in the morning. Which, by the way, three minutes? Isnae a proper wank. Cannae have been anything too amazing you were thinking about. Hey, dinnae knock the pants. Never had another man's trousers I've felt so comfortable in. I was even tempted to go with nay any underwear, but figured that would've been pushing my luck. Freeballing before we really know each other is one step too far. Wouldnae want to risk my title as a knight in shining Adidas trackpants." Iain took a sip of beer himself, his eyes very much on Ryan's face. "Wow, head of ICU? Sounds impressive even if there isnae any patient contact. I couldnae ever imagine being a doctor. It's enough to try and keep a restaurant running, and afloat. Dinnae really know what I was thinking opening another one, but London seemed like a good spot for expansion. Plus it brings to closer to Stu."
"It's all I had time for before the kid was needing breakfast and all the other stuff kids need in the morning, like a boot up the butt to remind him to brush his teeth and not put dirty socks on because they're there in easy reach," Ryan explained, still smirking. He glanced over at Iain, meeting his eyes mischievously. "Well, you did want in my pants the minute you saw me. You got your wish," he teased and blew him a joking kiss before putting the beer back to lips for another sip. "There's patient contact in extreme emergencies, or when patients get bugs up their ass about my doctors and want a second opinion. That's where I step in to try and avoid conflict. I'm pretty young to be in the position, but I've got the experience, so they seemed to think I could handle it. Usually I can cope, but you just get thrown when your kid isn't top notch. I personally couldn't even imagine running a restaurant. You must have your hands full. Like I said, I can only cook the basics. I try not to spend too much time in the kitchen because it's really not a spectacular experience in general. Stu, he's your kid brother, right? What has him hailing from sunny Scotland to London for you to be needing to follow? Way I hear it, Scots are pretty loyal to their home soil."
"That's such a shame. Bloke needs more than a three minute wank to get him through the day. Guess it's where an extra pair of hands come in handy. They can be getting you off while you deal with everything else. That's one thing I miss about being with someone... The human contact that comes with being around them nearly all the time." Iain let out a low chuckle, his own gaze mischievous as he cupped himself with his free hand. "Just glad I'm nay too much man to fit into them. Wouldnae have wanted to tear anything. And hey, I didnae want you that soon... much. Just a wee bit. I cannae help you're my type." He cleared his throat, moving his hand as he started to retreat into his shell again at the idea that maybe he was more attracted to Ryan than Ryan was to him. Ryan had only dabbled with men, where as Iain was all about them. Then again, Stuart was a dabbler and he'd found love with his English Cock. He took a sip of beer and tried to relax again. "Congratulations, then. They really must think you're ready. Plus it's given you the time with Hayden, so that's a huge upside. Aye, but I dinnae do much cooking at the restaurant. I'm nay a chef, or anything. Just love my food, and know how to crunch numbers and organise things. The only cooking I do is strictly at home. When I have the time, anyway. Which is pretty often lately. Aye, he is. He's the youngest of us Evans. He's the detective, so his work brought him here. After his bitch ex fucked him over for a promotion. Now he's sticking around for a lawyer he met. He, ah, got hurt recently. The lawyer, nay Stu. Car accident."
Ryan was looking at him with a small frown of thought when he finished talking. "Lawyer... car accident..." He looked over Iain's face. When he had first seen him on the train, he had the briefest of hints he had maybe seen the guy before. It didn't stick though, he was too distracted and you could get that feeling at any time and it not really mean something. "Did he stay in a private hospital? Just out of curiosity?" he asked, and was only asking because one of his most prominent cases since he started the job had been a lawyer with a copper boyfriend. In fact, the high profile of the case, it had kept Ryan on his toes for weeks coaching staff to dodge the media and deal with added security. The whole unit had been crawling with detectives at one point, even from the Major Investigations Unit. Ryan had to meet with them to give them permission when and how they could be present on the ward without disrupting or affecting his other patients. He pressed his lips together and shrugged. "Can't say much on your first point, dude. It's been a long time since I had any of that... romantic contact. Beyond, you know, random hook ups now and again. Hasn't been a lot of that since I moved here. Not that the British don't seem to offer some good prospects," he added with a smirk, not hiding the fact he was looking Iain over. "So, you're here to make sure he's all okay after the ordeal under the guise of the restaurant? I admire you. He probably does need you."
Iain gave a slow nod, and raised his hand to run his fingers through his short hair as he looked at Ryan, eyes narrowed slightly while he tried to work out if he'd seen the bloke before. There had been so many doctors running around, and most of his attention had been on his little brother. There was a little niggle that maybe he had seen Ryan there, and he could even easily imagine him in a white lab coat. "Yes, he was. The guy's pretty well off, so it wasn't like it mattered. Jesus, was it your hospital? I can't believe how small this world can be sometimes." His hand moved to drop back down to his thigh, resting against it as he tried not to get hard just from having Ryan look him over. As comfortable as the trackpants were he had a feeling they still wouldn't hide very much. "Apparently I've been ignoring British prospects, guess I was waiting for a Yank to come along. See if it's true about Americans doing everything better. It's a damn shame you havenae had any romantic contact, however, I've been the same. Random hooks up, but nay since I left Edinburgh. Aye, in a manner of speaking. It just seemed to be a good time to try and expand, and Stuart was getting homesick anyway. I'd like to think I could curb it for a little while, give him some time just to be with his suit."
Ryan nodded slowly. "Yeah, I think it might have been. Trying to figure out if I want to push the privacy and confidentiality envelope here. Was his name Thomas? I should be safe. Next step would have been charades with you trying to guess who I was talking about, and I so don't have the energy for that. The case was high profile enough, though. Just about all media in London knew what hospital he was in. Made my job interesting for a few weeks, to say the least. Best to get thrown into the deep end right off the bat though, I suppose." His eyes were still intent on Iain, and there were some inner thoughts about how easily it would be for him to just say the word and go to bed with him. But with Hayden's track record today, they'd inevitably get interrupted and Ryan was wary about another random hook up. It always seemed okay at first, until they got cold feet about a single dad with a kid who - like it or lump it - was Ryan's first priority no matter what. He had been wondering of late if he should just check out of the dating notion and just stick to being a dad. Save any heartache at being repeatedly dumped, and there was always porn and his right hand. Still, he couldn't deny it. He missed that intimate human contact, sex, being naked with someone. Hell, he even just missed making out and he found himself licking his lips, eyes dropping to Iain's before he could realise where his train of thought had taken him. He cleared his throat. "You sound like a close family, and if we're on the same page here with the lawyer, I can vouch for him needing you right now." What was one kiss going to hurt? He leaned in, brushing his lips against Iain's in a soft kiss which he picked up slowly after a moment of hesitation. He caught Iain's lower lip between his own and then teased the tip of his tongue just briefly along the curve of it in the wake of his lips, desperately hoping he wasn't playing with fire here. But it was nice... it was really, really nice.
Iain had been about to confirm that it had been Thomas M Hunt, and that the suit was his brother's boyfriend, but then Ryan was kissing him and at first Iain wasn't sure what to do. There was no denying he wanted it. God, he wanted it. He had been thinking about snogging Ryan since they met on the train, even with Hayden in the picture. The kid wasn't scaring him away like he probably should, and Iain was still waiting to feel that urge to bolt like Ryan was telling him might happen, but there wasn't one. Especially not now. Iain's hand cupped Ryan's face, and he rubbed his thumb against the other man's jaw as he started to kiss back, meeting Ryan's slow pace.
Like any typical good father would be, Ryan was a skilled multi-tasker. He had one ear trained on hearing his boy if he called out, but he was still able to take this moment for what it was. It felt like there was a bolt of electricity through him that almost took his breath away. God, it had been a long fucking time since he'd had anything like this. He wanted to take just a small moment to be completely selfish, but it always came with guilt, like he wasn't putting Hayden first. He knew as he kissed Iain that he just had a deep yearning he always kept locked away to just find someone who could fit with him, would be okay to take him as he came, and he came with Hayden. So far, it had been like trying to find the Holy Grail. Ever since Emily died, he had never been able to get a momentum on the dating market and sometimes wondered if he even wanted to, or if it was just putting Hayden at risk of getting hurt too if he tried. But there was always casual sex, right? That offered something, if nothing special. It was purely physical and guys needed the physical, right? It would be so easy to take this further, and he knew he wanted it. But maybe it was just selfish to want it? He pulled out of the kiss, his hand resting on Iain's arm and his forehead creased a little in contemplation of the situation.
Iain ran his tongue over his lip in the wake of the kiss as he watched Ryan, trying to resist the urge to just go straight for his fly and get his hand around Ryan's cock. He wanted more, he really, really wanted more. He was already starting to get hard and he closed his eyes briefly as he clenched his jaw and tried to think of something other than sex, and making out, and getting off. He looked back at Ryan, and touched his thumb to the other man's lip with a soft smile. His nerves were tingling like he'd just been shocked, and couldn't deny there had been some pretty instaneous and intense chemistry. Most of his casual lays were more about convenience rather than any kind of chemistry. "Been a while since I had a kiss like that."
Ryan was painfully hard now. It was easy not to anticipate sex or anything like it when you knew it wasn't coming. It was easy to just go along in life, swept up in the chaos of it, and not actually really miss that side of things. Sure, you wanted it, who didn't? But there wasn't a constant urge for it, you could always find some other away to satiate that need. It was out there now, though, that anticipation and want. There was a tiny part of him thinking he should apologise, but Iain hadn't seemed to mind Ryan's forwardness, something even Ryan himself wasn't sure where it had come from. He usually danced around a bit first, so this was slightly out of character. At least for him these days. When he was younger, in college, in Army training, it was a different story of course. He had none of the life burdens back then that he did now. He glanced up the hall, checking to see if Hayden was about to call out, but it remained silent and Ryan's eyes dipped back down to Iain's face with a smirk. "Am I seriously supposed to believe that?" he teased. It was fortunate now that he had opted for track pants to give Iain. No button, no zips, no belts. Convenient. He tucked his fingers into the waist of Iain's pants and then further below his boxers, his hand seeking out Iain's cock, which he gave a small squeeze.
Iain gave a groan before he could stop himself, head falling back against the sofa. Once his cock seemed to think it was getting a go ahead, it was rock hard in moments, eager now it was in Ryan's hand. Iain's own hand fumbled for Ryan's crotch, giving a returning squeeze before trying to get his fly open and giving into his urges. "Aye, you are," he hissed out as he lifted his head to meet Ryan's gaze again, his eyebrow arching up in amusement. "I told Stu it had been a week since my last lay, but honestly... it's been longer. And none of them have made me feel like this... Like I'm humming with electricity."
"Shhh..." Ryan coaxed softly, realising this was going to be a test. It might be a modest apartment, but it wasn't extensively huge. Hayden was still asleep up the hall, and could come out looking for his Dad at any time. He started to work his hand up and down Iain's length, exploring the feel of him in his palm. His ministrations would be enough to show Iain that he really didn't just 'dabble' in men occasionally. He had a lot of experience with men, in fact, just no lasting relationships with them. He shifted so he was knelt beside Iain, able to get a better grip this way. He leaned close, his lips almost touching Iain's again. "How long?" he murmured. "And why so long?"
Iain gave a nod, and bit down on his lip to stop another groan escaping. In all honesty he just wanted to lie there and enjoy Ryan's attentions, but he had never been one to have a single-sided encounter. He preferred giving and taking. The lovers he'd had that were all take, take, take had never lasted long. He got Ryan's fly open, and slipped his hand inside, his nostrils flaring as his eyes darkened. His fingers curled around his length, and started to stroke up and down as he matched Ryan's rhythm. The guy really wasn't a dabbler, and that just turned Iain on more. He knew what he was doing, and Iain was enjoying every moment. "Months. Mostly it's been because I just dinnae feel up to playing the game anymore. I dinnae want to bother with dating, but I dinnae always want to bother with picking up some random dick and find out he isnae really all that worth it, and it just ends up being some half-hearted shag, and a whimper of an orgasm. Three minutes with help is just as pathetic, aye? I spend half the time faking it."
Ryan ran his tongue along his lower lip, sucking in a sharp breath and letting it out slowly. His timeframe of drought was probably on par with Iain's. Time seemed to go so quickly these days that he hadn't realised weeks had turned into months and months was rapidly veering into a year. He could convince himself that he needed this. For the sex side of things, without stopping to think on what was supposed to happen after. It felt wrong on some level to be getting off with a chivalrous bloke on the train who had just stopped to help and then ended up getting puked on in thanks. It shouldn't be right, should it? But Iain was keen, and reciprocating. They were consenting adults, and it wasn't hurting Hayden. It could work. He let his head drop back a little, eyes falling closed as he just indulged in the feeling of a hand that wasn't his own on his cock, pleasuring him. It felt fucking amazing. Yeah, he did want to be naked with Iain, and in any other circumstances, probably would by now. He looked back at Iain and let his lips brush against his again. "Faking it? I hope you aren't faking it now," he said breathlessly.
"Couldnae fake it now," Iain replied in a husky whisper, his voice hitching slightly as he almost gasped. "Nay need to fake it..." He used his free hand to grip the back of Ryan's neck, pulling him down into a forceful kiss as he changed his grip and slid his fingers further back to massage his balls. He lifted his hips up to Ryan's touch, cursing inwardly that clothes were still involved in the scenario, but somewhere in the back of his head he got it. Hayden was here, he was in his room, and at any stage could call for his father. It would be easier for Ryan to go and deal with his son if he was still somewhat presentable. He just didn't give much thought to Hayden coming out to look for him, and hopefully he wouldn't. Iain needed this. He needed a connection with someone that wasn't some twinked out university student, or some straight guy feeling curious. He wanted something that had just a little meaning behind it, even if he had no idea what it was.
It was a relief to hear, even if Ryan knew he would be up to the challenge of very much making Iain not fake it. If he was going to have any sort of encounter like this, he was going to make it well worth it. Hayden really had been out for the count this last time Ryan tucked him back in. The other times he had been restless and distressed about feeling sick, but this time he was asleep, arm wrapped around his favourite stuffed alligator. It probably afforded them some time. Ryan moved again, not breaking the kiss as he forced Iain to lie back on the sofa, and he melted down on top of him, lying between his legs. He picked the kiss up now they had an easier position to work with and started pumping Iain's cock in his fist with more intent rhythm. He was definitely well hung, and Ryan couldn't help but wonder how it would feel to have Iain take him deeply. The thing was, Ryan rarely bottomed. Very rarely, he was usually the one to top in encounters with other men, and the alternative was something he usually stuck to for people he cared for and trusted. The thought about Iain surprised him, but it didn't intimidate him. He pushed his hips forward against Iain's hand, allowing himself a small grunt of pleasure against Iain's mouth as a burst of arousal shot through him in warning.
Iain's hand started to match Ryan's rhythm again as he pushed his trousers down so his hand didn't keep getting caught, and his rhythm disrupted. He pushed his fingers firmly against the curve of Ryan's ass and hummed quietly with approval. He was also having thoughts about being buried balls deep in the other man, not to mention having Ryan balls deep inside him. Iain didn't really care if he was on the bottom, or top, but it was true that most of his casual encounters usually involved him topping. He broke off the kiss, panting heavily as he slid his mouth along Ryan's jaw, keeping his voice to a whisper. "Got nay idea just how much I'd love to suck you off sometime."
Ryan tilted his head to the side just a little, inviting Iain's lips to do whatever the hell they pleased with his jaw. If Hayden called out for him now, he really might start crying in frustration. He was almost there and he could feel those delicious little pulses sweeping through him. He was pretty much basically humping Iain's hand by this point, it was impossible for his hips not to want to get in on the action. His cock was trying to tell him he should be outright having sex, none of this handjob stuff, but his mind was still trying to be practical. It was all it took for him not to try and turn into a pretzel and lean over to start sucking Iain's cock just from the words breathed against his ear. He was a multi-tasker, but he wasn't that good of one. But there was no room to think of logistics anymore, he was reaching the edge at an alarming rate and he blamed lack of sex for the lack of stamina. There was a slight whimper of frustration in his throat as he tried to hold off just that little bit longer, but it was no use. With a rush of released breath through a stifled moan, Ryan dropped his head onto Iain's shoulder as the much anticipated orgasm tore through and he exploded into Iain's hand, his cock pulsing from the sheer rush of pleasure.
Iain was hardly one to judge about Ryan's stamina. His own cock had been ready to leap to attention from a kiss let alone from a handjob. If he was on top he would have been just as much humping Ryan's hand, and even now he was still lifting his hips to try and simulate what he really wanted to be doing. He felt the warm, sticky come covering his hand, and the base of his spine tingled in warning as he gripped Ryan's arse and pulled him tight against him while he bit down on his lip hard enough to draw blood as he stopped the loud moan wanting to escape. He was breathing heavily, his eyes slipping closed briefly in relief of having experienced a powerful orgasm. He made no move to slip his hand from around Ryan's cock just yet, murmuring praises for the man's anatomy in his thick Scottish accent.
Ryan was breathless and he could feel his heart thumping in his chest from the exertion. He let himself relax, lying on top of Iain in that post-orgasmic glow that was impossible not to indulge in. "Jesus," he murmured through a small laugh, running his tongue along his lips to wet them. It definitely wouldn't have been anywhere in the realms of how he would have expected his day to turn out if someone had asked him to guess. Not in a million years. He released his grip from Iain's cock, but his hand remained down the front of his pants, moving his fingers to softly brush small strokes back and forth across Iain's lower stomach. "You have no idea how much I needed that today," he added, looking up at the ceiling from where his head was lying on Iain's shoulder.
"You and me both," Iain returned with a low chuckle. He shifted his grip finally, moving his hand to the small of Ryan's back as he brushed his fingers against it under his shirt. He was more than content to stay in this position, the snuggling that could come after an orgasm - no matter how quick - just as nice as the orgasm itself. He bent his leg at the knee as he pinned Ryan in position and brushed a kiss agains the man's temple. He couldn't deny a sudden caring for him. He didn't know where it stemmed from, but he was glad he'd done his knight in shining armour act on the train. Now he just had to hope he was enough to keep Ryan interested when he wasn't being a hero.
Ryan could feel that sleepy feeling settling over him. He couldn't deny he was one of those blokes that tended to fall asleep after sex. It just meant he was relaxed. He puffed his cheeks out and let out another slow breath to fight off the urge to fall asleep like that. He knew that after this feeling wore off, it would just be replaced with stressing about Hayden. He groaned softly when the stress came back sooner than he really wanted it to. "You must have your hands full getting the restaurant off the ground. How did you have time to be there to save my fatherly ass from potential tragedy?"
"My builders find me overbearing," Iain replied with another chuckle. "Apparently I hover too much. They wanted a day where I didnae interfere. So I decided to come home early. I'm glad I did, otherwise I wouldnae met you." He brought one of his hands up to brush his fingers over Ryan's hair, and kissed the top of his head. Again, there was that sensation of falling into an easy pattern, of intimacy already existing between them. "Are you okay?"
Ryan exhaled heavily with a small growl of frustration. His hand stilled on Iain's stomach as he scrunched his nose up and pulled his lips to the side. "Yeah, yeah... I'm okay. I'm just in a bit of a shit pile. Hayden's grandparents usually step in and rescue me when my time is pushed. They don't mind, they love having him. Normally when he's ill, they come stay here when I'm at work. They probably would have collected him from school for me as soon as I got the call about the gym puke, but they're on holiday abroad. Well-deserved, too. They left, like, three days ago, for three weeks. Hay's teacher said these bug things stick around for a few days, and gave me all the lecture about dehydration and fluids and bull-fucking-shit. I'm a doctor, I know my son. Anyway, that's not the point, even if it pissed me off. You do the math."
Iain was quiet as he listened, his own hand still combing through Ryan's hair to try and ease his stress. He couldn't imagine what it would be like to be a single father relying on grandparents to look after his boy. He had five brothers as well as his parents. He would probably not have found himself in short supply of willing babysitters. A part of him was even starting to wonder how Angus would cope with Keira if Kylie couldn't take her, and he was left with the bairn one day. "You can't take the time off work to watch him."
Ryan sighed and gave his head a slight shake. "Not really. My boss was great about today, but I've only been in the job a couple of months. I have work hanging out of my asshole. That's what those plastic bags were full off, patient flow analysis needed in two days time. I'm even here, with a sick kid, and I still need to work. I really have no idea what I'm going to do. Probably try and call on one of Emily's old pals or something, but I don't even know them all that well. I've got mates at work, but none who would be willing to help out with something like this. Probably why I'm starting to get an odd tension headache behind one of my eyeballs."
Iain shifted, trying to sit up a little while still holding onto Ryan. "You know what they say the best thing is for headaches... Maybe you need to up your dose? And... I dinnae know if I'm pushing my luck, or even if I'm the best qualified considering you dinnae hardly know me, but I could watch him for you. Hayden, I mean. I could... keep an eye on him. I'm nay as busy as I normally would be, and he doesnae seem to mind me so far. I'm nay trying to step over any boundaries, and I'm nay even sure what it'll mean, but... I could. If you wanted." He drew his eyebrows together, and looked at Ryan almost nervously. He wasn't even sure where the offer had come from, but it was suddenly tumbling past his lips before he could stop it.
With a small frown, Ryan shifted, hand slipping from Iain's pants so he could raise up and see Iain's face better. He searched it, probably looking for some sort of answer to questions that he wasn't even sure of. "Are you..." he paused with a small shake of his head in confusion. "You would do that? Are you serious? It's not that I don't know you, but you don't know us. The kid could be a right brat. He's not, but I'm just saying. You couldn't get a better kid. But... shit... that's... are you sure? Even with your hands full with your business? I-I don't know if I can ask you to do that. I mean, he's ill, and that's a massive thing to ask of you."
Iain held his hands up, his palms facing Ryan. He was all too aware one of them was still a little sticky, but for the moment he ignored it. Serious discussions could still be had with sperm involved. "You arenae asking though, are you? I'm offering. Dinnae ask, just accept. I wouldnae offer if I didnae want to take on the responsibility. I cannae see Hayden being a brat. It just doesnae seem like him, even if I've only met him while he's poorly. I want to get to know you, I want to get to know him. If this is how I do it, then... I'm willing."
Ryan was just stunned, and at first, he was speechless. He really didn't know what to say. No one had just selflessly offered help to him so freely in his life, at least, not being Emily's parents. It was surreal and he really wasn't sure how he was supposed to feel. He felt guilty at first for putting Iain in a position to think he even had to offer, and then he felt a sense of relief that maybe, on some level, he really wasn't completely alone all of a sudden. Then he felt confused, wondering if he should leave Hayden with a stranger while he was ill, but then, Hayden didn't seem to mind Iain, and it would only be during the day while Ryan worked. Ryan could even duck home at lunch time to make sure things were okay. "Even if he's ill? This could just be the start. He might get worse, more, uh... messy."
"Four brothers," Iain gently reminded him. "I can handle the mess. I'll also call my Ma' if I need advice. Feel free to run a police check, hell, I'll even give you my credit card or something to hang onto so if I fuck up you can keep it, cut it up, do whatever. I'm nay trying to be funny... I just... I dinnae really know how to say it. I guess I just want to show you that I'll nay do a bolt, and I want to maybe stick around for a bit. If that's okay! And maybe in three weeks when the grandparents are back, and the wee lad isnae sick any more I could take you on a date?"
"Wow, you really know how to get a dude's mind racing, don't you?" Ryan laughed and let out another breath. He was awed, and he was still looking over Iain's face like he was about to burst out laughing and tell him he was joking. "It's been a long, long time since I was asked out on a date. I'm probably really rusty. And I just... wow. I'm not making excuses for any of this, or trying to fob you off. I am just seriously stunned, and wondering why you would want to do all this for me. Please don't take that the wrong way, you're clearly an amazing guy, and I feel really fortunate that my kid chose to barf on you right now. I just don't have much experience with people selflessly offering me help like this, and now I'm rambling."
Iain's expression shifted, but more because he was starting to become a little embarrassed that he'd made the other man ramble, like maybe he really had stepped over a line, and Ryan was just too polite to tell him to fuck off or something. "I didnae mean to. I was rambling just a wee bit. It slipped out... you dinnae have to say yes, or anything. To any of it. I'll understand if you dinnae. Just seems like you could use a couple hands, and I'm attracted to you... clearly."
"I could," Ryan reassured him without hesitation. "I really could use the help. I'm just not used to relying on people, and I don't want you to feel you had to offer just because I was stuck. I'm just trying to give you a chance to back out, that's all. You don't know how much I appreciate this... all of this. It's times like this I really start feeling useless, like I'm not doing a good enough job and letting Emily down in the one thing I promised her I would do. I start thinking I've made bad choices or wrong moves, and that Hayden's going to get hurt for it. I don't mean to dump any of this on you, but I just needed you to know how much it means to me. I'm not sure I've ever quite met anyone like you in my life."
Iain ducked his head with a shy smile, becoming bashful for a moment at Ryan's last comment. He looked up again slowly, and reached out to pull Ryan closer so he could kiss him. It was slow, and lingering, Iain trying to let the other man know he really wasn't going anywhere. Even if his stomach was clenching with fear at the idea of being alone with a sick kid. "I havenae met anyone like you either, you know. But I'm nay all that special. Thanks, though."
"Yeah, you really are," Ryan insisted with a laugh, wetting his lips as his eyes dipped down to look at Iain's in the wake of the kiss. "So, at risk of setting my guilt complex into overdrive, I really would appreciate the help. You've saved me a lot of heartache and worry, and Hayden seems to already be fond of you. He usually doesn't take that well to strangers. He took me by surprise, but I figure if his gut instinct is okay with it, then mine should be too."
Iain shook his head, still feeling like he was blushing. "Nay, I'm really not, but you're welcome. I just hope I dinnae fuck up, and you've both wasted your trust. I promise I'll take really good care of him. You both took me by surprise."
Ryan was about to lean in and pick the kiss up from where it left off, Hayden calling out for him through a whimper had Ryan immediately scrambling up off the sofa. "Hold that thought," he told him apologetically, tucking himself back into his jeans and zipping them up. But he paused, tilting his head a little and pointing behind him with his thumb. "Unless you want to come with me to see to him?" he asked.
Iain gave a nod as he tried to tidy up his hair a bit, and check that he was all tucked away, too. He looked down at his hand and tried to wipe it off on the back of the trackpants where hopefully Hayden wouldn't see. "Sure, I'll, ah... come." He smirked just briefly, unable to ignore the unintentional innuendo. "Gotta start somewhere, aye?"
Words: 7506
That makes me scared, alright
This could be nothing
But I'm willing to give it a try
Please give me something
'Cause someday I might know my heart
Give Me Something - James Morrison
Co-written with doctordefib
[Follows THIS]
Ryan stretched and scraped his nails through his hair as he came back up the hall of his apartment yet again. He let out a rough, helpless sigh and came to stand in front of Iain, who was sitting comfortably on the sofa flicking through the Sky TV channels. He couldn't help but be amused how easily the Scot had made himself at home and looked like he was a regular part of the furniture. Ryan was relieved, he had been worried and feeling guilty about forcing the guy into a corner for his help. He had managed to get Hayden and himself cleaned up, then Hayden tucked into bed with a bucket and some lemonade. He had a definite fever, and kept complaining of a sore tummy and sore head, but after a quick checkover, Ryan was able to placate himself that his son didn't have appendicitis or anything more serious like that. There were no funky rashes, no warning aches in the back or neck, no unusual pains elsewhere. Kids picked up bugs all the time, this one just had the worst timing ever. By the time Ryan had gotten back out to his unexpected houseguest, Iain had cleaned up himself and changed into the well-worn trackpants Ryan had managed to dig out of his closet. He hadn't realised how much his laundry had backed-up and he didn't want to give the guy anything that wasn't washed. He had made himself at home and they finally had a chance to sit down and have a bit of a chat over a cup of tea, real English tea something Ryan had well come to love since moving to London. Often, it was more cathartic than alcohol. It wasn't long lasting, though, three times Hayden had called out for his Dad with three more bouts of vomiting. Ryan just sat with him, holding his head and rubbing his back until it passed and he dozed off again. After the third time, Ryan was started to feel sleepy himself and he was sure his hallway now had track marks from the amount of times he had walked up and down it not only when Hayden called, but now and again in between to check on him.
He pointed to the kitchen of the open-plan apartment with an apologetic smile. "I'm going be slightly reckless and indulge in a beer. Do you want one? I need something to give me a kick of stamina. On the upside, I think he's maybe finally spewed himself empty, so I might be able to stick in one place for a little longer. Until the diarrhoea kicks in, which is probably inevitable according to what the school teacher told me when I called her. It's going around and sticks for a few days..." He scratched at his head with his thumb and then moved to the kitchen, glad for the open-plan so he could continue the conversation. "And as much as I hate to say this because I already feel terrible you got dragged into this less-than-pleasant chaos, but I hope you have a good immune system."
Iain had been fine, amusing himself with the TV remote while Ryan took care of Hayden. He really hadn't felt like he was being kept waiting, the only thing making him slightly hesitant had been if he was actually intruding on the father-son time, but Ryan seemed happy to keep trying to talk to him in between the emergency calls. He stopped flicking, letting the TV stay on a channel featuring some cartoon, or other, and turned his head to watch Ryan. "Sure, a beer would be great. And really, it's nay bother. Like I said, four younger brothers. Isane anything a boy can produce that I havenae seen before. Still amazes me such a little kid can hold so much vomit. I hope the diarrhoea at least doesnae come for a couple hours. He seems like a good kid, I'm sorry he's been hit so hard. That you both have. You're nay such a bad boy yourself," he added with a slight smirk. "And my immune system is just fine."
Ryan was trying to hold the fridge door open with his butt while he dug around in the bottom of the fridge to tear the new six pack open. Another thing he hadn't managed to get around to. The hinge on the fridge was loose, or something, and it made the fucker keep closing when you were trying to get something out of it. It had resulted in Hayden spilling red cordial all over the floor before school one morning when the door caught him in the back by surprise. "Tell me about it. Still, not such a foreign concept to me. Spent many a day up to my elbows in vomit, diarrhoea, pus, mucus... you name it. Sorry if you're squeamish," he added with a smirk of his own as he got the beers free and elbowed the fridge door closed. He brought them over and sunk down into the seat beside Iain with a deep, long sigh of relief, letting his head rest back against it. He handed one of the bottles to Iain and then twisted the lid off his. "Pfft, I'm shattered. Today has felt like it's lasted a week. I didn't even know there was this mini epidemic going around the school. Some father I am. I might've been able to plan a bit better if I had known... not completely sure how, though. Luck hasn't been much on my side of late." He held his bottle up. "Cheers, man. For everything."
"My younger brothers wouldnae have ever let me get away with being squeamish. Five boys in one family... cannae even imagine what it would have been like with nay vomit, diarrhoea, pus, mucus, or anything else you can think of. You didnae ever say what it was you did. Just that it was hard with your wee lad to juggle him and work. I'm going to hazard a guess at something medical." He took the beer gratefully, almost feeling sympathetic stress from watching Ryan all this time. "Cheers, mate. And dinnae worry, it's been my pleasure. I just hope you get something good out of today. Dinnae like the days that nay give me anything good to remember them for. They really are the ones that feel like a week crammed into a day."
Ryan swallowed the mouthful of beer and then licked his lips with a small laugh. "Well, there was a three minute wank this morning before I got up. That wasn't too bad. Then it all sort of went down hill from there. Though, on the upside, I've never really had a knight in shining, er, Adidas trackpants before," he said in amusement, pointing to the pants Iain was wearing with his beer, "so I'm really not entitled to claim the whole day as being shit. Even this, I can't remember the last time I sat and had a beer with someone that wasn't my secretary or my kid's grandfather. Which is extremely pathetic to admit, but welcome to my life. I'm a doctor, a trauma specialist to be exact. Just, these days, I don't have much hands on patient contact. I took a position at a private hospital in London to give me more time with Hay. Head of ICU. It keeps me on my toes, but then, it can't possibly throw more shit at me than the military did, so it's all good. Mostly. Just don't have time to scratch myself."
Iain couldn't help but smile impishly. "Unless it's the three minute wank in the morning. Which, by the way, three minutes? Isnae a proper wank. Cannae have been anything too amazing you were thinking about. Hey, dinnae knock the pants. Never had another man's trousers I've felt so comfortable in. I was even tempted to go with nay any underwear, but figured that would've been pushing my luck. Freeballing before we really know each other is one step too far. Wouldnae want to risk my title as a knight in shining Adidas trackpants." Iain took a sip of beer himself, his eyes very much on Ryan's face. "Wow, head of ICU? Sounds impressive even if there isnae any patient contact. I couldnae ever imagine being a doctor. It's enough to try and keep a restaurant running, and afloat. Dinnae really know what I was thinking opening another one, but London seemed like a good spot for expansion. Plus it brings to closer to Stu."
"It's all I had time for before the kid was needing breakfast and all the other stuff kids need in the morning, like a boot up the butt to remind him to brush his teeth and not put dirty socks on because they're there in easy reach," Ryan explained, still smirking. He glanced over at Iain, meeting his eyes mischievously. "Well, you did want in my pants the minute you saw me. You got your wish," he teased and blew him a joking kiss before putting the beer back to lips for another sip. "There's patient contact in extreme emergencies, or when patients get bugs up their ass about my doctors and want a second opinion. That's where I step in to try and avoid conflict. I'm pretty young to be in the position, but I've got the experience, so they seemed to think I could handle it. Usually I can cope, but you just get thrown when your kid isn't top notch. I personally couldn't even imagine running a restaurant. You must have your hands full. Like I said, I can only cook the basics. I try not to spend too much time in the kitchen because it's really not a spectacular experience in general. Stu, he's your kid brother, right? What has him hailing from sunny Scotland to London for you to be needing to follow? Way I hear it, Scots are pretty loyal to their home soil."
"That's such a shame. Bloke needs more than a three minute wank to get him through the day. Guess it's where an extra pair of hands come in handy. They can be getting you off while you deal with everything else. That's one thing I miss about being with someone... The human contact that comes with being around them nearly all the time." Iain let out a low chuckle, his own gaze mischievous as he cupped himself with his free hand. "Just glad I'm nay too much man to fit into them. Wouldnae have wanted to tear anything. And hey, I didnae want you that soon... much. Just a wee bit. I cannae help you're my type." He cleared his throat, moving his hand as he started to retreat into his shell again at the idea that maybe he was more attracted to Ryan than Ryan was to him. Ryan had only dabbled with men, where as Iain was all about them. Then again, Stuart was a dabbler and he'd found love with his English Cock. He took a sip of beer and tried to relax again. "Congratulations, then. They really must think you're ready. Plus it's given you the time with Hayden, so that's a huge upside. Aye, but I dinnae do much cooking at the restaurant. I'm nay a chef, or anything. Just love my food, and know how to crunch numbers and organise things. The only cooking I do is strictly at home. When I have the time, anyway. Which is pretty often lately. Aye, he is. He's the youngest of us Evans. He's the detective, so his work brought him here. After his bitch ex fucked him over for a promotion. Now he's sticking around for a lawyer he met. He, ah, got hurt recently. The lawyer, nay Stu. Car accident."
Ryan was looking at him with a small frown of thought when he finished talking. "Lawyer... car accident..." He looked over Iain's face. When he had first seen him on the train, he had the briefest of hints he had maybe seen the guy before. It didn't stick though, he was too distracted and you could get that feeling at any time and it not really mean something. "Did he stay in a private hospital? Just out of curiosity?" he asked, and was only asking because one of his most prominent cases since he started the job had been a lawyer with a copper boyfriend. In fact, the high profile of the case, it had kept Ryan on his toes for weeks coaching staff to dodge the media and deal with added security. The whole unit had been crawling with detectives at one point, even from the Major Investigations Unit. Ryan had to meet with them to give them permission when and how they could be present on the ward without disrupting or affecting his other patients. He pressed his lips together and shrugged. "Can't say much on your first point, dude. It's been a long time since I had any of that... romantic contact. Beyond, you know, random hook ups now and again. Hasn't been a lot of that since I moved here. Not that the British don't seem to offer some good prospects," he added with a smirk, not hiding the fact he was looking Iain over. "So, you're here to make sure he's all okay after the ordeal under the guise of the restaurant? I admire you. He probably does need you."
Iain gave a slow nod, and raised his hand to run his fingers through his short hair as he looked at Ryan, eyes narrowed slightly while he tried to work out if he'd seen the bloke before. There had been so many doctors running around, and most of his attention had been on his little brother. There was a little niggle that maybe he had seen Ryan there, and he could even easily imagine him in a white lab coat. "Yes, he was. The guy's pretty well off, so it wasn't like it mattered. Jesus, was it your hospital? I can't believe how small this world can be sometimes." His hand moved to drop back down to his thigh, resting against it as he tried not to get hard just from having Ryan look him over. As comfortable as the trackpants were he had a feeling they still wouldn't hide very much. "Apparently I've been ignoring British prospects, guess I was waiting for a Yank to come along. See if it's true about Americans doing everything better. It's a damn shame you havenae had any romantic contact, however, I've been the same. Random hooks up, but nay since I left Edinburgh. Aye, in a manner of speaking. It just seemed to be a good time to try and expand, and Stuart was getting homesick anyway. I'd like to think I could curb it for a little while, give him some time just to be with his suit."
Ryan nodded slowly. "Yeah, I think it might have been. Trying to figure out if I want to push the privacy and confidentiality envelope here. Was his name Thomas? I should be safe. Next step would have been charades with you trying to guess who I was talking about, and I so don't have the energy for that. The case was high profile enough, though. Just about all media in London knew what hospital he was in. Made my job interesting for a few weeks, to say the least. Best to get thrown into the deep end right off the bat though, I suppose." His eyes were still intent on Iain, and there were some inner thoughts about how easily it would be for him to just say the word and go to bed with him. But with Hayden's track record today, they'd inevitably get interrupted and Ryan was wary about another random hook up. It always seemed okay at first, until they got cold feet about a single dad with a kid who - like it or lump it - was Ryan's first priority no matter what. He had been wondering of late if he should just check out of the dating notion and just stick to being a dad. Save any heartache at being repeatedly dumped, and there was always porn and his right hand. Still, he couldn't deny it. He missed that intimate human contact, sex, being naked with someone. Hell, he even just missed making out and he found himself licking his lips, eyes dropping to Iain's before he could realise where his train of thought had taken him. He cleared his throat. "You sound like a close family, and if we're on the same page here with the lawyer, I can vouch for him needing you right now." What was one kiss going to hurt? He leaned in, brushing his lips against Iain's in a soft kiss which he picked up slowly after a moment of hesitation. He caught Iain's lower lip between his own and then teased the tip of his tongue just briefly along the curve of it in the wake of his lips, desperately hoping he wasn't playing with fire here. But it was nice... it was really, really nice.
Iain had been about to confirm that it had been Thomas M Hunt, and that the suit was his brother's boyfriend, but then Ryan was kissing him and at first Iain wasn't sure what to do. There was no denying he wanted it. God, he wanted it. He had been thinking about snogging Ryan since they met on the train, even with Hayden in the picture. The kid wasn't scaring him away like he probably should, and Iain was still waiting to feel that urge to bolt like Ryan was telling him might happen, but there wasn't one. Especially not now. Iain's hand cupped Ryan's face, and he rubbed his thumb against the other man's jaw as he started to kiss back, meeting Ryan's slow pace.
Like any typical good father would be, Ryan was a skilled multi-tasker. He had one ear trained on hearing his boy if he called out, but he was still able to take this moment for what it was. It felt like there was a bolt of electricity through him that almost took his breath away. God, it had been a long fucking time since he'd had anything like this. He wanted to take just a small moment to be completely selfish, but it always came with guilt, like he wasn't putting Hayden first. He knew as he kissed Iain that he just had a deep yearning he always kept locked away to just find someone who could fit with him, would be okay to take him as he came, and he came with Hayden. So far, it had been like trying to find the Holy Grail. Ever since Emily died, he had never been able to get a momentum on the dating market and sometimes wondered if he even wanted to, or if it was just putting Hayden at risk of getting hurt too if he tried. But there was always casual sex, right? That offered something, if nothing special. It was purely physical and guys needed the physical, right? It would be so easy to take this further, and he knew he wanted it. But maybe it was just selfish to want it? He pulled out of the kiss, his hand resting on Iain's arm and his forehead creased a little in contemplation of the situation.
Iain ran his tongue over his lip in the wake of the kiss as he watched Ryan, trying to resist the urge to just go straight for his fly and get his hand around Ryan's cock. He wanted more, he really, really wanted more. He was already starting to get hard and he closed his eyes briefly as he clenched his jaw and tried to think of something other than sex, and making out, and getting off. He looked back at Ryan, and touched his thumb to the other man's lip with a soft smile. His nerves were tingling like he'd just been shocked, and couldn't deny there had been some pretty instaneous and intense chemistry. Most of his casual lays were more about convenience rather than any kind of chemistry. "Been a while since I had a kiss like that."
Ryan was painfully hard now. It was easy not to anticipate sex or anything like it when you knew it wasn't coming. It was easy to just go along in life, swept up in the chaos of it, and not actually really miss that side of things. Sure, you wanted it, who didn't? But there wasn't a constant urge for it, you could always find some other away to satiate that need. It was out there now, though, that anticipation and want. There was a tiny part of him thinking he should apologise, but Iain hadn't seemed to mind Ryan's forwardness, something even Ryan himself wasn't sure where it had come from. He usually danced around a bit first, so this was slightly out of character. At least for him these days. When he was younger, in college, in Army training, it was a different story of course. He had none of the life burdens back then that he did now. He glanced up the hall, checking to see if Hayden was about to call out, but it remained silent and Ryan's eyes dipped back down to Iain's face with a smirk. "Am I seriously supposed to believe that?" he teased. It was fortunate now that he had opted for track pants to give Iain. No button, no zips, no belts. Convenient. He tucked his fingers into the waist of Iain's pants and then further below his boxers, his hand seeking out Iain's cock, which he gave a small squeeze.
Iain gave a groan before he could stop himself, head falling back against the sofa. Once his cock seemed to think it was getting a go ahead, it was rock hard in moments, eager now it was in Ryan's hand. Iain's own hand fumbled for Ryan's crotch, giving a returning squeeze before trying to get his fly open and giving into his urges. "Aye, you are," he hissed out as he lifted his head to meet Ryan's gaze again, his eyebrow arching up in amusement. "I told Stu it had been a week since my last lay, but honestly... it's been longer. And none of them have made me feel like this... Like I'm humming with electricity."
"Shhh..." Ryan coaxed softly, realising this was going to be a test. It might be a modest apartment, but it wasn't extensively huge. Hayden was still asleep up the hall, and could come out looking for his Dad at any time. He started to work his hand up and down Iain's length, exploring the feel of him in his palm. His ministrations would be enough to show Iain that he really didn't just 'dabble' in men occasionally. He had a lot of experience with men, in fact, just no lasting relationships with them. He shifted so he was knelt beside Iain, able to get a better grip this way. He leaned close, his lips almost touching Iain's again. "How long?" he murmured. "And why so long?"
Iain gave a nod, and bit down on his lip to stop another groan escaping. In all honesty he just wanted to lie there and enjoy Ryan's attentions, but he had never been one to have a single-sided encounter. He preferred giving and taking. The lovers he'd had that were all take, take, take had never lasted long. He got Ryan's fly open, and slipped his hand inside, his nostrils flaring as his eyes darkened. His fingers curled around his length, and started to stroke up and down as he matched Ryan's rhythm. The guy really wasn't a dabbler, and that just turned Iain on more. He knew what he was doing, and Iain was enjoying every moment. "Months. Mostly it's been because I just dinnae feel up to playing the game anymore. I dinnae want to bother with dating, but I dinnae always want to bother with picking up some random dick and find out he isnae really all that worth it, and it just ends up being some half-hearted shag, and a whimper of an orgasm. Three minutes with help is just as pathetic, aye? I spend half the time faking it."
Ryan ran his tongue along his lower lip, sucking in a sharp breath and letting it out slowly. His timeframe of drought was probably on par with Iain's. Time seemed to go so quickly these days that he hadn't realised weeks had turned into months and months was rapidly veering into a year. He could convince himself that he needed this. For the sex side of things, without stopping to think on what was supposed to happen after. It felt wrong on some level to be getting off with a chivalrous bloke on the train who had just stopped to help and then ended up getting puked on in thanks. It shouldn't be right, should it? But Iain was keen, and reciprocating. They were consenting adults, and it wasn't hurting Hayden. It could work. He let his head drop back a little, eyes falling closed as he just indulged in the feeling of a hand that wasn't his own on his cock, pleasuring him. It felt fucking amazing. Yeah, he did want to be naked with Iain, and in any other circumstances, probably would by now. He looked back at Iain and let his lips brush against his again. "Faking it? I hope you aren't faking it now," he said breathlessly.
"Couldnae fake it now," Iain replied in a husky whisper, his voice hitching slightly as he almost gasped. "Nay need to fake it..." He used his free hand to grip the back of Ryan's neck, pulling him down into a forceful kiss as he changed his grip and slid his fingers further back to massage his balls. He lifted his hips up to Ryan's touch, cursing inwardly that clothes were still involved in the scenario, but somewhere in the back of his head he got it. Hayden was here, he was in his room, and at any stage could call for his father. It would be easier for Ryan to go and deal with his son if he was still somewhat presentable. He just didn't give much thought to Hayden coming out to look for him, and hopefully he wouldn't. Iain needed this. He needed a connection with someone that wasn't some twinked out university student, or some straight guy feeling curious. He wanted something that had just a little meaning behind it, even if he had no idea what it was.
It was a relief to hear, even if Ryan knew he would be up to the challenge of very much making Iain not fake it. If he was going to have any sort of encounter like this, he was going to make it well worth it. Hayden really had been out for the count this last time Ryan tucked him back in. The other times he had been restless and distressed about feeling sick, but this time he was asleep, arm wrapped around his favourite stuffed alligator. It probably afforded them some time. Ryan moved again, not breaking the kiss as he forced Iain to lie back on the sofa, and he melted down on top of him, lying between his legs. He picked the kiss up now they had an easier position to work with and started pumping Iain's cock in his fist with more intent rhythm. He was definitely well hung, and Ryan couldn't help but wonder how it would feel to have Iain take him deeply. The thing was, Ryan rarely bottomed. Very rarely, he was usually the one to top in encounters with other men, and the alternative was something he usually stuck to for people he cared for and trusted. The thought about Iain surprised him, but it didn't intimidate him. He pushed his hips forward against Iain's hand, allowing himself a small grunt of pleasure against Iain's mouth as a burst of arousal shot through him in warning.
Iain's hand started to match Ryan's rhythm again as he pushed his trousers down so his hand didn't keep getting caught, and his rhythm disrupted. He pushed his fingers firmly against the curve of Ryan's ass and hummed quietly with approval. He was also having thoughts about being buried balls deep in the other man, not to mention having Ryan balls deep inside him. Iain didn't really care if he was on the bottom, or top, but it was true that most of his casual encounters usually involved him topping. He broke off the kiss, panting heavily as he slid his mouth along Ryan's jaw, keeping his voice to a whisper. "Got nay idea just how much I'd love to suck you off sometime."
Ryan tilted his head to the side just a little, inviting Iain's lips to do whatever the hell they pleased with his jaw. If Hayden called out for him now, he really might start crying in frustration. He was almost there and he could feel those delicious little pulses sweeping through him. He was pretty much basically humping Iain's hand by this point, it was impossible for his hips not to want to get in on the action. His cock was trying to tell him he should be outright having sex, none of this handjob stuff, but his mind was still trying to be practical. It was all it took for him not to try and turn into a pretzel and lean over to start sucking Iain's cock just from the words breathed against his ear. He was a multi-tasker, but he wasn't that good of one. But there was no room to think of logistics anymore, he was reaching the edge at an alarming rate and he blamed lack of sex for the lack of stamina. There was a slight whimper of frustration in his throat as he tried to hold off just that little bit longer, but it was no use. With a rush of released breath through a stifled moan, Ryan dropped his head onto Iain's shoulder as the much anticipated orgasm tore through and he exploded into Iain's hand, his cock pulsing from the sheer rush of pleasure.
Iain was hardly one to judge about Ryan's stamina. His own cock had been ready to leap to attention from a kiss let alone from a handjob. If he was on top he would have been just as much humping Ryan's hand, and even now he was still lifting his hips to try and simulate what he really wanted to be doing. He felt the warm, sticky come covering his hand, and the base of his spine tingled in warning as he gripped Ryan's arse and pulled him tight against him while he bit down on his lip hard enough to draw blood as he stopped the loud moan wanting to escape. He was breathing heavily, his eyes slipping closed briefly in relief of having experienced a powerful orgasm. He made no move to slip his hand from around Ryan's cock just yet, murmuring praises for the man's anatomy in his thick Scottish accent.
Ryan was breathless and he could feel his heart thumping in his chest from the exertion. He let himself relax, lying on top of Iain in that post-orgasmic glow that was impossible not to indulge in. "Jesus," he murmured through a small laugh, running his tongue along his lips to wet them. It definitely wouldn't have been anywhere in the realms of how he would have expected his day to turn out if someone had asked him to guess. Not in a million years. He released his grip from Iain's cock, but his hand remained down the front of his pants, moving his fingers to softly brush small strokes back and forth across Iain's lower stomach. "You have no idea how much I needed that today," he added, looking up at the ceiling from where his head was lying on Iain's shoulder.
"You and me both," Iain returned with a low chuckle. He shifted his grip finally, moving his hand to the small of Ryan's back as he brushed his fingers against it under his shirt. He was more than content to stay in this position, the snuggling that could come after an orgasm - no matter how quick - just as nice as the orgasm itself. He bent his leg at the knee as he pinned Ryan in position and brushed a kiss agains the man's temple. He couldn't deny a sudden caring for him. He didn't know where it stemmed from, but he was glad he'd done his knight in shining armour act on the train. Now he just had to hope he was enough to keep Ryan interested when he wasn't being a hero.
Ryan could feel that sleepy feeling settling over him. He couldn't deny he was one of those blokes that tended to fall asleep after sex. It just meant he was relaxed. He puffed his cheeks out and let out another slow breath to fight off the urge to fall asleep like that. He knew that after this feeling wore off, it would just be replaced with stressing about Hayden. He groaned softly when the stress came back sooner than he really wanted it to. "You must have your hands full getting the restaurant off the ground. How did you have time to be there to save my fatherly ass from potential tragedy?"
"My builders find me overbearing," Iain replied with another chuckle. "Apparently I hover too much. They wanted a day where I didnae interfere. So I decided to come home early. I'm glad I did, otherwise I wouldnae met you." He brought one of his hands up to brush his fingers over Ryan's hair, and kissed the top of his head. Again, there was that sensation of falling into an easy pattern, of intimacy already existing between them. "Are you okay?"
Ryan exhaled heavily with a small growl of frustration. His hand stilled on Iain's stomach as he scrunched his nose up and pulled his lips to the side. "Yeah, yeah... I'm okay. I'm just in a bit of a shit pile. Hayden's grandparents usually step in and rescue me when my time is pushed. They don't mind, they love having him. Normally when he's ill, they come stay here when I'm at work. They probably would have collected him from school for me as soon as I got the call about the gym puke, but they're on holiday abroad. Well-deserved, too. They left, like, three days ago, for three weeks. Hay's teacher said these bug things stick around for a few days, and gave me all the lecture about dehydration and fluids and bull-fucking-shit. I'm a doctor, I know my son. Anyway, that's not the point, even if it pissed me off. You do the math."
Iain was quiet as he listened, his own hand still combing through Ryan's hair to try and ease his stress. He couldn't imagine what it would be like to be a single father relying on grandparents to look after his boy. He had five brothers as well as his parents. He would probably not have found himself in short supply of willing babysitters. A part of him was even starting to wonder how Angus would cope with Keira if Kylie couldn't take her, and he was left with the bairn one day. "You can't take the time off work to watch him."
Ryan sighed and gave his head a slight shake. "Not really. My boss was great about today, but I've only been in the job a couple of months. I have work hanging out of my asshole. That's what those plastic bags were full off, patient flow analysis needed in two days time. I'm even here, with a sick kid, and I still need to work. I really have no idea what I'm going to do. Probably try and call on one of Emily's old pals or something, but I don't even know them all that well. I've got mates at work, but none who would be willing to help out with something like this. Probably why I'm starting to get an odd tension headache behind one of my eyeballs."
Iain shifted, trying to sit up a little while still holding onto Ryan. "You know what they say the best thing is for headaches... Maybe you need to up your dose? And... I dinnae know if I'm pushing my luck, or even if I'm the best qualified considering you dinnae hardly know me, but I could watch him for you. Hayden, I mean. I could... keep an eye on him. I'm nay as busy as I normally would be, and he doesnae seem to mind me so far. I'm nay trying to step over any boundaries, and I'm nay even sure what it'll mean, but... I could. If you wanted." He drew his eyebrows together, and looked at Ryan almost nervously. He wasn't even sure where the offer had come from, but it was suddenly tumbling past his lips before he could stop it.
With a small frown, Ryan shifted, hand slipping from Iain's pants so he could raise up and see Iain's face better. He searched it, probably looking for some sort of answer to questions that he wasn't even sure of. "Are you..." he paused with a small shake of his head in confusion. "You would do that? Are you serious? It's not that I don't know you, but you don't know us. The kid could be a right brat. He's not, but I'm just saying. You couldn't get a better kid. But... shit... that's... are you sure? Even with your hands full with your business? I-I don't know if I can ask you to do that. I mean, he's ill, and that's a massive thing to ask of you."
Iain held his hands up, his palms facing Ryan. He was all too aware one of them was still a little sticky, but for the moment he ignored it. Serious discussions could still be had with sperm involved. "You arenae asking though, are you? I'm offering. Dinnae ask, just accept. I wouldnae offer if I didnae want to take on the responsibility. I cannae see Hayden being a brat. It just doesnae seem like him, even if I've only met him while he's poorly. I want to get to know you, I want to get to know him. If this is how I do it, then... I'm willing."
Ryan was just stunned, and at first, he was speechless. He really didn't know what to say. No one had just selflessly offered help to him so freely in his life, at least, not being Emily's parents. It was surreal and he really wasn't sure how he was supposed to feel. He felt guilty at first for putting Iain in a position to think he even had to offer, and then he felt a sense of relief that maybe, on some level, he really wasn't completely alone all of a sudden. Then he felt confused, wondering if he should leave Hayden with a stranger while he was ill, but then, Hayden didn't seem to mind Iain, and it would only be during the day while Ryan worked. Ryan could even duck home at lunch time to make sure things were okay. "Even if he's ill? This could just be the start. He might get worse, more, uh... messy."
"Four brothers," Iain gently reminded him. "I can handle the mess. I'll also call my Ma' if I need advice. Feel free to run a police check, hell, I'll even give you my credit card or something to hang onto so if I fuck up you can keep it, cut it up, do whatever. I'm nay trying to be funny... I just... I dinnae really know how to say it. I guess I just want to show you that I'll nay do a bolt, and I want to maybe stick around for a bit. If that's okay! And maybe in three weeks when the grandparents are back, and the wee lad isnae sick any more I could take you on a date?"
"Wow, you really know how to get a dude's mind racing, don't you?" Ryan laughed and let out another breath. He was awed, and he was still looking over Iain's face like he was about to burst out laughing and tell him he was joking. "It's been a long, long time since I was asked out on a date. I'm probably really rusty. And I just... wow. I'm not making excuses for any of this, or trying to fob you off. I am just seriously stunned, and wondering why you would want to do all this for me. Please don't take that the wrong way, you're clearly an amazing guy, and I feel really fortunate that my kid chose to barf on you right now. I just don't have much experience with people selflessly offering me help like this, and now I'm rambling."
Iain's expression shifted, but more because he was starting to become a little embarrassed that he'd made the other man ramble, like maybe he really had stepped over a line, and Ryan was just too polite to tell him to fuck off or something. "I didnae mean to. I was rambling just a wee bit. It slipped out... you dinnae have to say yes, or anything. To any of it. I'll understand if you dinnae. Just seems like you could use a couple hands, and I'm attracted to you... clearly."
"I could," Ryan reassured him without hesitation. "I really could use the help. I'm just not used to relying on people, and I don't want you to feel you had to offer just because I was stuck. I'm just trying to give you a chance to back out, that's all. You don't know how much I appreciate this... all of this. It's times like this I really start feeling useless, like I'm not doing a good enough job and letting Emily down in the one thing I promised her I would do. I start thinking I've made bad choices or wrong moves, and that Hayden's going to get hurt for it. I don't mean to dump any of this on you, but I just needed you to know how much it means to me. I'm not sure I've ever quite met anyone like you in my life."
Iain ducked his head with a shy smile, becoming bashful for a moment at Ryan's last comment. He looked up again slowly, and reached out to pull Ryan closer so he could kiss him. It was slow, and lingering, Iain trying to let the other man know he really wasn't going anywhere. Even if his stomach was clenching with fear at the idea of being alone with a sick kid. "I havenae met anyone like you either, you know. But I'm nay all that special. Thanks, though."
"Yeah, you really are," Ryan insisted with a laugh, wetting his lips as his eyes dipped down to look at Iain's in the wake of the kiss. "So, at risk of setting my guilt complex into overdrive, I really would appreciate the help. You've saved me a lot of heartache and worry, and Hayden seems to already be fond of you. He usually doesn't take that well to strangers. He took me by surprise, but I figure if his gut instinct is okay with it, then mine should be too."
Iain shook his head, still feeling like he was blushing. "Nay, I'm really not, but you're welcome. I just hope I dinnae fuck up, and you've both wasted your trust. I promise I'll take really good care of him. You both took me by surprise."
Ryan was about to lean in and pick the kiss up from where it left off, Hayden calling out for him through a whimper had Ryan immediately scrambling up off the sofa. "Hold that thought," he told him apologetically, tucking himself back into his jeans and zipping them up. But he paused, tilting his head a little and pointing behind him with his thumb. "Unless you want to come with me to see to him?" he asked.
Iain gave a nod as he tried to tidy up his hair a bit, and check that he was all tucked away, too. He looked down at his hand and tried to wipe it off on the back of the trackpants where hopefully Hayden wouldn't see. "Sure, I'll, ah... come." He smirked just briefly, unable to ignore the unintentional innuendo. "Gotta start somewhere, aye?"
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