I'll keep singin this lie if you keep believing it ~ FOB
yeah so today overall was an alright day i guess...i just really dont like Thanksgiving that much. were a "wanna-be" family which is gay and pisses me off. Then I am upset about this whole Adam thing, then we get a call saying my uncle only has a short more time to live....CAN ANYTHING ELSE GO WRONG IN MY LIFE?! omgsh i swear...im just going to stop caring about everything. be the person i used to be and be a bitch and tell them EXACTLY how i feel about them or the things they do. im sick of being nice to everyone and in return they treat me bad.
I have been through so much in my life...sometimes i wonder why God puts me through it all? maybe its because im a strong person and he knows i can handle it?? i dont know but sometimes im glad he puts me through it rather than someone else, it makes me the strong person that i am today. I dont know sometimes i get mad though because it seems like when finally my life is going back together something goes wrong and i get hurt. its been like that my whole entire life. if it wasnt one thing than it was another. I just want to leave and stay gone for awhile. and for some of you...you dont even have any idea what life is like...AT ALL...you have never experienced half of the things that can go wrong in someones life. im not saying i've experienced everything about life but i can say that i have been through ALOT....and i do think that i can handle alot because of what i have been through.
Today i hung out with Tina for a little bit and we did doughnuts in a church parking lot...geez that was fun!
Talked to Adam earlier. that wasnt a good convo...he told me some stuff i didnt want to hear but hey at least hes telling me the truth. I seriously believe that i will never look at him in the same way. Im not a bitch or a hoe about my shit and i dont think that some guy should ever be able to disrespect me...so im going to just leave him alone and quit thinking of him. maybe one day he will realize what he could of had but maybe he wont....who really knows who really cares?? i sure dont....i could care a less right now about anything basically
Want to know what i dont get?? guys say they love someone but hang out with someone else and go do stuff with them....well guess what if this boy was so in love with you like they say they are gauranteed they wont go hang out with some other girl and do stuff with her. I know when i loved will you didnt see me going and hanging out with other guys and doing stuff with them....i loved will and i would never do anything to hurt him. Even though me and adam arent or never were together i love him so i will never go do stuff with someone else.....no when your in love then thats just something you DONT do....its not love otherwise. some people are so blind to everything it is so unbelievable! it cant be love because when you love someone you would never do that kind of stuff because they shouldnt want to experience someone else when they have you...right? yes that would be correct.... but hey maybe thats just how i see it? but im almost positive that is very true...i dont know! i guess im a little confused about love??
but hey what do i know about life or love....i guess not to much
I am thankful for everything i have in my life. and no i might not be rich like everyone in whitehall but hey at least im living?? No matter what goes wrong in my life im always up for new challenges and i love the fact that i am worthy of living a life even if im not worthy of anything else. i have the best thing anyone could want...a life..its the most precious thing you will ever have no matter how messed up it gets. Getting hurt over and over and over againg really helps me grow and learn...i hate the hurt but i love it because i am taught new lessons that will help me in the long run
I think im going to do something i havent done in a long time....pray. im going to pray for everyone in this world except myself. i dont need prayers like other people do. I realize that other people have it so much more worse than i do.
have a great night and a great day tomorrow. be safe!
I have been through so much in my life...sometimes i wonder why God puts me through it all? maybe its because im a strong person and he knows i can handle it?? i dont know but sometimes im glad he puts me through it rather than someone else, it makes me the strong person that i am today. I dont know sometimes i get mad though because it seems like when finally my life is going back together something goes wrong and i get hurt. its been like that my whole entire life. if it wasnt one thing than it was another. I just want to leave and stay gone for awhile. and for some of you...you dont even have any idea what life is like...AT ALL...you have never experienced half of the things that can go wrong in someones life. im not saying i've experienced everything about life but i can say that i have been through ALOT....and i do think that i can handle alot because of what i have been through.
Today i hung out with Tina for a little bit and we did doughnuts in a church parking lot...geez that was fun!
Talked to Adam earlier. that wasnt a good convo...he told me some stuff i didnt want to hear but hey at least hes telling me the truth. I seriously believe that i will never look at him in the same way. Im not a bitch or a hoe about my shit and i dont think that some guy should ever be able to disrespect me...so im going to just leave him alone and quit thinking of him. maybe one day he will realize what he could of had but maybe he wont....who really knows who really cares?? i sure dont....i could care a less right now about anything basically
Want to know what i dont get?? guys say they love someone but hang out with someone else and go do stuff with them....well guess what if this boy was so in love with you like they say they are gauranteed they wont go hang out with some other girl and do stuff with her. I know when i loved will you didnt see me going and hanging out with other guys and doing stuff with them....i loved will and i would never do anything to hurt him. Even though me and adam arent or never were together i love him so i will never go do stuff with someone else.....no when your in love then thats just something you DONT do....its not love otherwise. some people are so blind to everything it is so unbelievable! it cant be love because when you love someone you would never do that kind of stuff because they shouldnt want to experience someone else when they have you...right? yes that would be correct.... but hey maybe thats just how i see it? but im almost positive that is very true...i dont know! i guess im a little confused about love??
but hey what do i know about life or love....i guess not to much
I am thankful for everything i have in my life. and no i might not be rich like everyone in whitehall but hey at least im living?? No matter what goes wrong in my life im always up for new challenges and i love the fact that i am worthy of living a life even if im not worthy of anything else. i have the best thing anyone could want...a life..its the most precious thing you will ever have no matter how messed up it gets. Getting hurt over and over and over againg really helps me grow and learn...i hate the hurt but i love it because i am taught new lessons that will help me in the long run
I think im going to do something i havent done in a long time....pray. im going to pray for everyone in this world except myself. i dont need prayers like other people do. I realize that other people have it so much more worse than i do.
have a great night and a great day tomorrow. be safe!