something missing
Everyday its the same, always trying to find happinss, and as bj and i have decided "feeling good or ok" is satisfying to us now. I am willing to spend everyday looking for my past self. I do realize that we grow up and change but im willing to change into a different person, the happier and better person that i used to be. I have turned into everything that i promised to never become. Words of hatred, bitter, and total resentment towards every situation are daily for me and i have finally realized that it's all coming to an end. I dont even know who i am anymore, i know who i used to be and how happy i was. What has happened? Have the situations that i ran into this year turned me into the people that caused the pain. I can't blame anyone for what has happened this year, but i can blame myself for never learning, for never seeing the truth in so many people including myself. This whole year has made me realize so much, real friends, real relationships, hardships and how to overcome them, and i've found out who will always be there to comfort me and help like bj...i seriously dont think i could of finshed this year without him. I am sooo thankful to have him here at school and I'm so excited to spend the summer with him. He's an incredible friend to have and im sooo lucky that he's always around. I love him with the rest of my friends....im sure you know who you are if your one of the real ones...i love yall