super emo review
so i've been going to see a chiropractor since my jetta was totaled back in 2001. i started going because i was a little busted up in the accident, and i've continued to go more for the people that work there than necessity for my health. although, ok, at times, i totally need it because i manage to injure myself sleeping or something and wake up and my neck is all "yeah, not gonna move today." my chiropractor and one of his receptionists have become like a combination between surrogate family, close friends, and therapists. i love them both dearly. and i found out yesterday that both receptionists are leaving, and the one i'm closest with is leaving because she needs another job that provides benefits. to say that i am heartbroken might be an understatement. they both met me right around haywire-in-the-brain time, and have seriously helped me through some tough times. which is weird for a chiropractor and a secretary to be able to do that, but they did. i consoled myself with the fact that she'll still be around, and i can probably meet up with her every once in a while for lunch or something; she's only going to be working down the street, not in a different state or anything. but still. her leaving is affecting me quite hard.
crosses on the highway. you see them all the time. but one of them struck me yesterday. normally when i see crosses on the highway, there might be a name, initials, something to identify who passed away there. yesterday i saw a beautiful wooden cross that had "grampy" carved into the middle, and photographs taped to each end of the cross. i don't know why this one affected me in particular, because any vehicle related death seems senseless and tragic, but to see that it was someone's grandfather was a little more heartbreaking. and i found myself thinking about age discrepancy, and how a death of a younger person should seem more tragic based on the fact that a whole entire life was wiped out too soon, as opposed to someone who has lived their life. but it sort of upset me because i know that a lot of times speeding, or alcohol or reckless driving is the cause of most younger related accidents. this seemed sad because...well, i guess because on some level i feel for the elderly in the sense that they aren't youthful anymore, they are more hesitant, sometimes more fearful, they don't feel as invincible. not that elderly people are helpless, but they are...a little more frail. i have no idea how this accident was caused, and maybe someone else hit him. maybe he hit someone else. but i guess where younger people dying in car crashes seems to be the norm, it's odd to see someone much older. to live to see grandchilden and then be taken in a car crash seems depressing. in the end though, it seems you can't drive anywhere for more than a mile before you see some kind of memorial. there's even one in my neighborhood. i don't know. it's sad no matter what i guess. i can't really sit here and try to ruminate on why one age is worse than another. the word "grampy" totally threw me. maybe it just played into some of my fears: death, and getting older.
and also? this is little less emo little more anger, but this morning as i was coming to work, traffic started slowing down to an almost standstill, and two cop cars raced by. so i expected to see an accident some point down the road. but i rolled my eyes when traffic started to pick up right after passing the guy on the side of the road changing his tire. curiosity traffic for accidents i can deal with; for people changing tires is just stupid. even more so because i left my house retardedly early and still got to work late because of dumb traffic.
crosses on the highway. you see them all the time. but one of them struck me yesterday. normally when i see crosses on the highway, there might be a name, initials, something to identify who passed away there. yesterday i saw a beautiful wooden cross that had "grampy" carved into the middle, and photographs taped to each end of the cross. i don't know why this one affected me in particular, because any vehicle related death seems senseless and tragic, but to see that it was someone's grandfather was a little more heartbreaking. and i found myself thinking about age discrepancy, and how a death of a younger person should seem more tragic based on the fact that a whole entire life was wiped out too soon, as opposed to someone who has lived their life. but it sort of upset me because i know that a lot of times speeding, or alcohol or reckless driving is the cause of most younger related accidents. this seemed sad because...well, i guess because on some level i feel for the elderly in the sense that they aren't youthful anymore, they are more hesitant, sometimes more fearful, they don't feel as invincible. not that elderly people are helpless, but they are...a little more frail. i have no idea how this accident was caused, and maybe someone else hit him. maybe he hit someone else. but i guess where younger people dying in car crashes seems to be the norm, it's odd to see someone much older. to live to see grandchilden and then be taken in a car crash seems depressing. in the end though, it seems you can't drive anywhere for more than a mile before you see some kind of memorial. there's even one in my neighborhood. i don't know. it's sad no matter what i guess. i can't really sit here and try to ruminate on why one age is worse than another. the word "grampy" totally threw me. maybe it just played into some of my fears: death, and getting older.
and also? this is little less emo little more anger, but this morning as i was coming to work, traffic started slowing down to an almost standstill, and two cop cars raced by. so i expected to see an accident some point down the road. but i rolled my eyes when traffic started to pick up right after passing the guy on the side of the road changing his tire. curiosity traffic for accidents i can deal with; for people changing tires is just stupid. even more so because i left my house retardedly early and still got to work late because of dumb traffic.