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Muther fucker. My stupid lap top makes me delete stuff all the time. I was just rambling on about whoa as me i'm so fat blah blah blah. Everyone else around me is losing or skinnier than me period. Must be nice to be thinner than me. I was just looking at that number. 40. 140. 4. FOUR. There should never be a 4 in that place in my weight. That
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I know it looks bleak right now. I wish i could make all your pain go away... Painting sounds like it would be a great outlet. Take all your negative energy and just spilled it on the canvas. Make it so it will remind you why your doing all this. I know it's harder when you have to make actual meals for your little one instead of the simple formula that obviously isn't going to tempt you very much. Find out if there's something he likes alot that you don't like as much. Perhaps cook that meal when things get really rough on you. I know how frustrating it is to have one husband in the house who eats junk food, let alone a little one to go with it. I just wish I could give you the biggest hug ever and make all your problems go away. I wish that there was a magic pill that could completely erase our appetites. Speaking of which, I don't know if you have Shoppers Drug Marts in your area. Probably not, I think it's only a canadian thing. hmm... see if you can find Liquid Hoodia Extreme in Gel Caps. If you look it up online, you should be able to find a pic of a the box and bottle they come in. They are amazing! I mean, if you want to eat, your going to but they realy help with just saying no when you don't actually need the food. They run about 20$ for 38 pills here so it can get a bit expensive if you take two, three times a day but it's worth it. I don't know what i'd do without them.
I know what it's like to fall into that state where everything looks so bleak and it's easy to give up... just try to turn all that negative emotion into thinspiration of sorts. You will feel better as the numbers start to drop and instead of dwelling on the pain and feeling lost in it... try to tell yourself it only gets better from here if you stick with it because the numbers can only go down more.
I really hope this helps, even if it's just a little.
I've cried many nights feeling helpless and broken but then i pull my butt out of bed and learn from the feeling, whats causing it and how I can fix it... we're doing this together hon. Your not alone.
xo
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