001. Freefall
Title: Freefall (for the 100 suju fanfic challenge)
Pairing: Eeteuk/Kangin
Ratings: PG
Summary: Character death. Eeteuk finds his heart broken, and the only way to release himself....is through freefall.
"How does it feel to cut your hand when you are heartbroken? Can you feel the pain from that cut, or all you can understand and comprehend is that heart break within your soul, that empty spot that no one can ever feel again, that vacuum which she had taken it along with her, when she left you?"
--------------
Kangin woke up, upright in his bed. It's the third time he had been dreaming the same scene over and over again, unable to get it out of his mind. It had been a month, but no one in Super Junior had fully recovered from the shock and pain that he had left behind. A month...what is that considered to years of friendship and brotherhood? He had left a wide opening, a gaping wound in the minds of all the members, and he left his imprint everywhere, in a way no one wanted him to. Kangin sighed as he rolled out of the bed, knowing that he could not sleep after that nightmare. He slipped on his shoes and walked out of the dorm, right to the rooftop, where he had last saw him.
---------------
It was a cold night, with the wind blowing strongly, against his face, pushing the tears right out of his eyes. He walked right to the corner of the rooftop, looking over the edge. A tear rolled down his face, and fell off the chin, down, down to the bottom of the building. "Freefall", was what he would have described the previous scene to be. "No inhibitions, no limitations, freefalling the air, propelling to another universe".
-----Past-----
"Hey Kangin, I didn't expect to see you up here." Eeteuk mentioned casually. Kangin shrugged his shoulders, and stared at him. Everyone in the dorms had made him come up to the rooftop, knowing that Kangin was one of Eeteuk's favourite dongsaeng to talk to whenever anything went wrong. He walked over to Eeteuk, and smelt whiskey off his hyung. He glimpsed down on the floor, to spot bottles of whiskey lying there, as if they were worthless, useless, and forgotten.
"Kangin, have you ever broke up with anyone you deeply loved before?" Eeteuk questioned, looking at Kangin beneath his eyelashes. Kangin stood still, not trusting himself to speak. At this distance, he could see the wet eyelashes that hung closely to Eeteuk's eyes, and the stains, the tracks, the tears had left, proudly exclaiming their existence and presence on his face. "Yes hyung. Of course I have. But I cannot tell you about it." Kangin thought to himself.
"Has she ever broken your heart till it hurts to breath? Had she once made you realise that your world revolves around her, and she seems to be the only reason for your existence? Had she made you realised that you can go to any extent, any length for her, including taking her place in death?"
Kangin took a step forward, his eyes widening. "Hyung..." he mumbled.
Eeteuk silenced him with a wave of his hand, and placed his finger on his own lips, cautioning Kangin to let him speak. "That's what she told me today. Freefall. The end of something. Our attraction for each other was like gravity, pulling us towards each other so quickly, that before we knew it, that spark had happened. However, at the end of that freefall, we must hit the bottom, where everything splatters, ends, in death. Imagine freefall." Eeteuk mused. He picked himself up, and pulled out a pebble from his pocket. "Imagine freefall, Kangin, imagine it." He dropped the pebble down the building.
Kangin's gaze followed the pebble's way down the building. It was hauntingly beautiful, and it captured his breath away. The way the pebble fell so gracefully, like it was always meant to, like it was supposed to, as if this was the very moment in the life of a pebble. He watched as the pebble reached the sidewalk, bouncing, and finally came to a rest at the side. Kangin glanced up at Eeteuk, unsure of his next movement.
Eeteuk let out a long breath. "What a beautiful scene, isn't it? Breathtaking. Everything must come to a close, everything must reach their end one day. Remember me for this, Kangin. Not as that guy you see as the leader of Super Junior, not that guy who was once shy when he first met you all, not that guy who let out the high-pitched laugh always, whenever the atmosphere was right, or even when it was wrong. Remember me for this, for this exquisite free fall." He gazed at Kangin, mantaining eye contact, while he stood right up at the end, and fell backwards.
----Present-----
Kangin pulled himself back from reality, tears already running and streaked across his face. He had never once forgotten that scene, it would always be etched deeply within his mind. Free fall, was the last word that Eeteuk had said, before he fell and ended it at the bottom of the dorm. The members of Super Junior were shocked as well, as they had eavesdropped on their conversation at the rooftop, right outside the door. It was too late to do anything, and Kangin simply stood there, stunned, and speechless.
Kangin knelt down at the exact spot Eeteuk had stood before, his tears marking their presence on the ground, staining the already dark floor with further grey, giving an agonizing emphasis on the amount of pain that was about to burst forth within Kangin. He silently cursed Eeteuk for being so selfish, leaving the rest of the members here, to fend for themselves, and for committing suicide, just for someone who did not love him as much as he did for her.
"Hyung, you are stupid, you know that?" Kangin whispered softly, imagining Eeteuk's laughter at him from above.
"You once asked me if someone broke my heart so badly it hurts to even breath. And I'm here to answer you."
"Yes hyung, you did."
Pairing: Eeteuk/Kangin
Ratings: PG
Summary: Character death. Eeteuk finds his heart broken, and the only way to release himself....is through freefall.
"How does it feel to cut your hand when you are heartbroken? Can you feel the pain from that cut, or all you can understand and comprehend is that heart break within your soul, that empty spot that no one can ever feel again, that vacuum which she had taken it along with her, when she left you?"
--------------
Kangin woke up, upright in his bed. It's the third time he had been dreaming the same scene over and over again, unable to get it out of his mind. It had been a month, but no one in Super Junior had fully recovered from the shock and pain that he had left behind. A month...what is that considered to years of friendship and brotherhood? He had left a wide opening, a gaping wound in the minds of all the members, and he left his imprint everywhere, in a way no one wanted him to. Kangin sighed as he rolled out of the bed, knowing that he could not sleep after that nightmare. He slipped on his shoes and walked out of the dorm, right to the rooftop, where he had last saw him.
---------------
It was a cold night, with the wind blowing strongly, against his face, pushing the tears right out of his eyes. He walked right to the corner of the rooftop, looking over the edge. A tear rolled down his face, and fell off the chin, down, down to the bottom of the building. "Freefall", was what he would have described the previous scene to be. "No inhibitions, no limitations, freefalling the air, propelling to another universe".
-----Past-----
"Hey Kangin, I didn't expect to see you up here." Eeteuk mentioned casually. Kangin shrugged his shoulders, and stared at him. Everyone in the dorms had made him come up to the rooftop, knowing that Kangin was one of Eeteuk's favourite dongsaeng to talk to whenever anything went wrong. He walked over to Eeteuk, and smelt whiskey off his hyung. He glimpsed down on the floor, to spot bottles of whiskey lying there, as if they were worthless, useless, and forgotten.
"Kangin, have you ever broke up with anyone you deeply loved before?" Eeteuk questioned, looking at Kangin beneath his eyelashes. Kangin stood still, not trusting himself to speak. At this distance, he could see the wet eyelashes that hung closely to Eeteuk's eyes, and the stains, the tracks, the tears had left, proudly exclaiming their existence and presence on his face. "Yes hyung. Of course I have. But I cannot tell you about it." Kangin thought to himself.
"Has she ever broken your heart till it hurts to breath? Had she once made you realise that your world revolves around her, and she seems to be the only reason for your existence? Had she made you realised that you can go to any extent, any length for her, including taking her place in death?"
Kangin took a step forward, his eyes widening. "Hyung..." he mumbled.
Eeteuk silenced him with a wave of his hand, and placed his finger on his own lips, cautioning Kangin to let him speak. "That's what she told me today. Freefall. The end of something. Our attraction for each other was like gravity, pulling us towards each other so quickly, that before we knew it, that spark had happened. However, at the end of that freefall, we must hit the bottom, where everything splatters, ends, in death. Imagine freefall." Eeteuk mused. He picked himself up, and pulled out a pebble from his pocket. "Imagine freefall, Kangin, imagine it." He dropped the pebble down the building.
Kangin's gaze followed the pebble's way down the building. It was hauntingly beautiful, and it captured his breath away. The way the pebble fell so gracefully, like it was always meant to, like it was supposed to, as if this was the very moment in the life of a pebble. He watched as the pebble reached the sidewalk, bouncing, and finally came to a rest at the side. Kangin glanced up at Eeteuk, unsure of his next movement.
Eeteuk let out a long breath. "What a beautiful scene, isn't it? Breathtaking. Everything must come to a close, everything must reach their end one day. Remember me for this, Kangin. Not as that guy you see as the leader of Super Junior, not that guy who was once shy when he first met you all, not that guy who let out the high-pitched laugh always, whenever the atmosphere was right, or even when it was wrong. Remember me for this, for this exquisite free fall." He gazed at Kangin, mantaining eye contact, while he stood right up at the end, and fell backwards.
----Present-----
Kangin pulled himself back from reality, tears already running and streaked across his face. He had never once forgotten that scene, it would always be etched deeply within his mind. Free fall, was the last word that Eeteuk had said, before he fell and ended it at the bottom of the dorm. The members of Super Junior were shocked as well, as they had eavesdropped on their conversation at the rooftop, right outside the door. It was too late to do anything, and Kangin simply stood there, stunned, and speechless.
Kangin knelt down at the exact spot Eeteuk had stood before, his tears marking their presence on the ground, staining the already dark floor with further grey, giving an agonizing emphasis on the amount of pain that was about to burst forth within Kangin. He silently cursed Eeteuk for being so selfish, leaving the rest of the members here, to fend for themselves, and for committing suicide, just for someone who did not love him as much as he did for her.
"Hyung, you are stupid, you know that?" Kangin whispered softly, imagining Eeteuk's laughter at him from above.
"You once asked me if someone broke my heart so badly it hurts to even breath. And I'm here to answer you."
"Yes hyung, you did."