birthday
...was wonderful. There is nothing like being woken up at midnight on the dot by a chorus of friends that sing to you.
There was a surprise party later, though I already sort of suspected it (friends suddenly changing their plans on you because they forgot said plans are supposed to be a surprise -- "Hey, Julia , want to come with me to pick up some things from Lucia's -- WAIT. YOU CAN'T. NEVERMIND. WE'RE GETTING TOGETHER LATER AT NINE. BYE." -- is a pretty huge indicator. As is, at said get-together later, whispering in stage voices, "did you get the thing?? you know, the thing? It has to defrost for half an hour! Did no one remember?! Uhhh, yeah Julia, we found a flounder! An entire flounder! In the freezer. It was quite mysterious. You shouldn't look at it.")
But it was beautiful. In all honesty, although my birthdays have never been quite a big deal to me (at home it was always one of those days where Everything Goes Wrong, so maybe if we pretended it didn't exist we would be fine), it was nice to be made a big deal over anyway... It's hard to phrase this without sounding like an ego-centric prick -- it wasn't so much that they were celebrating me, except it was, in their own friendly way. Oh well! It is my birthday! Nothing is as important as I am in this moment!! Everyone should be subject to my whims!!!
Being 20 is, no matter what people may say about birthdays in general, a Big Deal. I was very proud of my first double-digit age 10 years ago, and while 18 was just another entry in "oh. I'm adult now? great. still a teenager. whatever" phase, I feel like the heavenly constellations have bestowed upon me a new sense of purpose and responsibility. My other friends, upon hitting 20, have done things like bemoaned the loss of their youth and wondered wild-eyedly about where their childhood had gone, but oh no, I am going to do things like buy groceries and write checks and think very seriously about my future (but umm, not procrastinating can come when I'm 21, ok?)
Part of it's simply going to be that I will accomplish things. No more "I wish I could" or thinking for days and days about projects I never actually start -- I will have something to show for myself this year. Daydreaming and wandering around lost in life belongs in the days I was homeschooled and terribly confused about money, and sex, and living by myself: now I will do things.
There was a surprise party later, though I already sort of suspected it (friends suddenly changing their plans on you because they forgot said plans are supposed to be a surprise -- "Hey, Julia , want to come with me to pick up some things from Lucia's -- WAIT. YOU CAN'T. NEVERMIND. WE'RE GETTING TOGETHER LATER AT NINE. BYE." -- is a pretty huge indicator. As is, at said get-together later, whispering in stage voices, "did you get the thing?? you know, the thing? It has to defrost for half an hour! Did no one remember?! Uhhh, yeah Julia, we found a flounder! An entire flounder! In the freezer. It was quite mysterious. You shouldn't look at it.")
But it was beautiful. In all honesty, although my birthdays have never been quite a big deal to me (at home it was always one of those days where Everything Goes Wrong, so maybe if we pretended it didn't exist we would be fine), it was nice to be made a big deal over anyway... It's hard to phrase this without sounding like an ego-centric prick -- it wasn't so much that they were celebrating me, except it was, in their own friendly way. Oh well! It is my birthday! Nothing is as important as I am in this moment!! Everyone should be subject to my whims!!!
Being 20 is, no matter what people may say about birthdays in general, a Big Deal. I was very proud of my first double-digit age 10 years ago, and while 18 was just another entry in "oh. I'm adult now? great. still a teenager. whatever" phase, I feel like the heavenly constellations have bestowed upon me a new sense of purpose and responsibility. My other friends, upon hitting 20, have done things like bemoaned the loss of their youth and wondered wild-eyedly about where their childhood had gone, but oh no, I am going to do things like buy groceries and write checks and think very seriously about my future (but umm, not procrastinating can come when I'm 21, ok?)
Part of it's simply going to be that I will accomplish things. No more "I wish I could" or thinking for days and days about projects I never actually start -- I will have something to show for myself this year. Daydreaming and wandering around lost in life belongs in the days I was homeschooled and terribly confused about money, and sex, and living by myself: now I will do things.