Title: The Truth Is [12/15]
Rating: R
Pairing, Characters: Jesse, Rachel, Mr.Schue with appearances by New Directions and Shelby
WC: ~ 3,000
Warnings: No real spoilers...
Summary: Jesse was adopted by the St.James family and he has finally found out what happened to his biological parents. This is the story of how he connects with his "father". It is also centred around the St.Berry relationship.
Will can’t believe what he had done. He has alienated and humiliated his son. His son. The words sounded foreign and scary on his tongue and in his mind, but there they were unchanging and seemingly true. The moment Jesse had said the words Will knew his world was forever changed.
Will stays in the music room after the rest of the students had shuffled out. He stayed and stared at the spot where minutes, maybe an hour ago he had been yelling at Jesse for being a spy to finding out he had an 18 year old son.
He drops his head into his hands and cries. He cries for the loss of a baby that never existed. He cries for the end of an 18 years long relationship. He cries for the girl who was forced to deal with becoming a mother on her own. He cries for Jesse, who just wanted to know his father and he cries for himself and how he in moments lost something that he never really had, but wanted more than anything, to be a parent.
Will doesn’t know how long he’s stayed in the music room thinking over the past few months and all the times Jesse had sought (well not out right the boy was to proud for that) his approval, told him about successes he had in classes and even conversations they had about Rachel. At the time Will had thought Jesse was like Finn, looking up to him as a father-figure because theirs were gone. Now he knows that for Jesse it was testing the waters to see if it was worth admitting the truth.
Will is so caught up in his thoughts that he doesn’t hear Emma walk into the room. He jumps when he feels a hand on his shoulder.
“Will it’s just me.” Emma says softly. She let’s out an audible gasp at the sight of Will’s face. “What’s wrong?”
“I screwed up Emma. I screwed up really badly.” Will tells her shaking his head.
“What happened?”
“I found out that Jesse was a spy,” Emma looks shocked. She had seen Jesse in the halls with Rachel and she had talked to him when he first transferred and he was a sweet kid if a little arrogant, he was self assured and seemingly honest Emma thought.
“What do you mean he’s a spy?”
“Well I got an email that proved he had been sending info about our club back to the coach of Vocal Adrenalin. And then I did something stupid. I confronted him about it in front of the whole group. I was so angry that I didn’t stop to think how inappropriate it was or how it would affect everyone, especially me and Jesse.”
Emma looks confused at the last sentence. Will sees the confusion and takes a deep breath before telling her the truth.
“In the middle of the fight I urged Jesse to tell the truth about why he decided to transfer and he - he admitted - well he said that he is my son.”
“Your son?”
“Yeah, my son.”
“What are you going to do?”
“I don’t know. He left so upset, he looked like he hated me.” Will says his voice cracking. “I don’t think he’ll want to see me again.”
Emma looks around the room gathering her thoughts before finding the right words to calm Will and maybe provide him with hope.
“Well the way you handled the spying was completely idiotic Will, but I think that is the least of your problems now. I think you are going to have to find a way to talk to Jesse. Although having spoken to him a few times, I think you might have to give him a few days. And I think you should take a few days as well to gather your thoughts and make sure that you know what you want to say to him.”
“Yes, yes.” Will nods, “thanks Emma.”
Emma stands and places her hand on his shoulder, Will reaches up and gives it a squeeze before standing and following her out of the room. Will is going to give Jesse the space he needs, Will just hopes that Jesse will come around and talk to him.
*Glee**Glee**Glee**Glee**Glee**Glee**Glee**Glee**Glee**Glee**Glee*
Through out the week Jesse avoided the music room, walking past the Spanish office or anywhere that he could possibly run into Will. After his outburst on Monday Jesse knew he wasn’t ready to face his father yet, but he couldn’t miss classes as he had presentations and tests. He wasn’t as upset any more, but he still felt betrayed; betrayed at the fact that Will confronted him in front of the class instead of coming to him privately to discuss the email.
Rachel had comforted him on Monday.
“Jesse?” Rachel asked knocking on the driver’s side window of Jesse’s car.
Jesse turns his head to look at Rachel. He’s pressing his lips together tightly and Rachel sees that he is trying not to let the tears that have collected in his eyes fall. Rachel pulls open the driver’s door and pushes Jesse over to the passenger seat. She is going to drive him home. The drive is silent, both trying to gather their thoughts. When Rachel pulls up in front of Jesse’s house, he squeezes her hand and gives her a grateful smile that she didn’t take him to his uncle’s.
The minute the two are on Jesse’s bed he breaks down. He doesn’t sob or do the dramatic crying he has perfected for some future acting role. It’s silent with his head in his hands and his body shaking slightly. Jesse is releasing all the frustrations of the day out and the pain and the humiliation he suffered in front of the club.
At this Rachel pulls him into her arms. His head settles on her chest and she can feel his tears. She slowly moves the back so that she is reclining against his headboard and he lying along her side hugging her torso to him and his head pillowed on her stomach.
“I’m sorry Jesse.” Rachel says when she feels him still. She’s not apologizing for herself but she doesn’t know what else to say.
“Me too.” Jesse responds and the brokenness of the word is haunting. Rachel knows that the apology isn’t for spying, but it is Jesse’s own regret of ever finding out who he really came from.
The pair is silent from then on. Just drawing on the quiet warmth they are providing.
She had stayed with him at his house in case he needed to talk more. He didn’t, the two had sat curled up in his bed watching movies. Tuesday morning Jesse gave Rachel a folder containing all the emails and told her to show them to their fellow glee club members. She questioned him at this and he said it was a way to prove his innocence in the matter and to prove to their club that he wasn’t going to abandon them for VA.
So in his avoidance of Will Schuester, Jesse had the other glee members coming up to him and apologizing. A few thanked him for not really spying on their club and for sticking with their club. Puck and Quinn all had questions about being adopted and what it felt like for him when he found out about his birth parents. He told them that he just wanted to know the truth, but that he never felt like his birth mother abandoned him, and that he never questioned not being wanted because his parents - even though left him alone for long periods of time - loved him, supported him and were proud of him. Jesse knew with his response he was calming some of the fears they had about giving up their daughter.
Brittany’s response was the only one that was a little shocking. She had proudly been telling everyone that she could, “Like read people’s minds and tell the future,” because she knew before everyone else that Jesse was Mr. Schue’s son. Then again it wasn’t so much shocking to everyone as it was a little puzzling that one girl could really be so clueless, but she was so earnest in her belief that everyone smiled and let her get away with such comments.
Unknown to Jesse at the time Rachel had decided that she would try and talk to Mr. Schue about Monday.
“Mr. Schue can I speak with you?” Rachel asks, knocking on the partially open office door.
“Yeah, come in.” Will says and Rachel seats herself across from him.
“I know that you know why I’m here. It’s about Jesse and what happened on Monday.”
“Of course,” Will says, “How is Jesse?”
“He’s still a little angry, he’s confused and I think he is a little disappointed at how the truth about everything came out.” Rachel tells Will. “I mean that’s the second time he blurted out the truth in the middle of a fight.”
Will gives Rachel a confused look at this and she continues.
“I had overheard that he was spying on our group or something along those lines and I confronted him and in the middle of our own fight he admitted that he was your son.”
“Oh. So you knew about the spying and you didn’t say anything? Or do anything?”
“Well he sent me every single copy of the emails he had been sending to Shelby, it proved that he hadn’t been spying on us, not really. And we talked about it and we were planning on telling the club and you about it when we got back form New York because Jesse had finally cut all ties with Shelby, but you kind of beat him to the punch.” Rachel says and then hands Will the folder with all the emails, “Here, this is every single email Jesse sent to Shelby with about our club.”
Will flips through some of the pages and sees that there are no titles of the songs the group has been working on or anything really resembling what the club had been working on.
“Thanks Rachel.”
“About the other thing…”
“I’m still in shock over that truth Rachel. I’m 34 and have a 17 year old son that I didn’t know about until fours days ago. And how can I be sure that it’s even the truth.”
“I think you should talk to Jesse about that sir.”
Will just nods and Rachel turns to her teacher and says,
“He wants to talk with you. He just wants to know you. More than just as a teacher. I’m going to convince him to come to glee club on today, so maybe by then you can think of a way to talk with him.”
“Thanks Rachel.” Will replies as Rachel lets herself out of the office.
By that afternoon Rachel had convinced Jesse to come to glee so that they can come up with a plan for regionals. They both know that the group is going to need a head start on rehearsing if they want to stand a chance against the powerhouse that is Vocal Adrenalin (they were still the best without Jesse because all had been trained to take over each other’s roles with a moments notice).
Jesse hesitates outside of the door to the music room. He can see that everyone is inside. He takes a steadying breath and strides in full of confidence. Everyone greets him with a smile and he takes his place next to Rachel who fits her hand into his, squeezing. Jesse can’t bring himself to look at Mr. Schuester, but he can feel the teacher’s eyes on him. The room is silent everyone waiting to see what will happen, Jesse had been prepared for this so he stands and faces the group.
“So as you all know now I am fully committed to this team, I don’t mean to sound all judgemental,” Jesse says and is cut off by Finn.
“You do mean to though St. James.”
“Ok maybe I do. But back to the point we are not yet at the level to beat Vocal Adrenalin. So nothing against the way things are done here but I have been training all my life to be the best and I think it’s time that we here did too. I think we need to pick our numbers and start practicing them so that when it comes time to take that stage we will blow the judges away. I know that Rachel will be the only one to agree with me out loud, but deep down you all know that what I’m saying is true.”
Though they didn’t want to have to admit it a few nodded in agreement with Jesse’s statement. Will just gave a proud smile at the boy for taking charge of the group, telling them what they needed to hear and yet keep the insults and very harsh criticisms to a minimum.
“Now before you all bombard me with suggestions for songs I just have to let you know that I did know what Vocal Adrenalin was going to perform. I don’t if they are going to stick with the same number; they might because unlike here in VA anyone is replaceable.”
“What are they performing St. James?” Puck asks and Jesse knows he can’t give out the song but he can point them in the right direction.
“I can’t tell you, but let’s just say that the band they’ve chosen is the head of a Monarchy.”
Some members of the group look at Jesse with blank looks, while Quinn, Rachel, Tina, Artie, Will and Kurt just roll their eyes. When no one says anything Kurt blurts out,
“It’s Queen everybody. Seriously does anybody pay attention in class? I think you should unless you want to stay here in Ohio and be a Lima loser. No offense.”
“If they are going to be doing Queen, we are going to need something epic, something to throw down with.” Mercedes says and every one murmurs out a few songs that they have performed that could work.
“I have a suggestion that I think could work perfectly. The first song that the club performed together was Don’t Stop Believing and I think we should use that. I mean it is what got us to this point and since we didn’t get to perform it at sectionals I think we could use it now.” Finn says and everyone agrees.
Jesse writes the song up on the white board as a definite performance number. He tells them that they are going to need a dance number as VA is going to include some heavy choreography and that if they can find a song that has a strong beat.
“I think if they are doing Queen we should show that we can as well, but better.” Santana says.
“Could work,” Will agrees.
“Well then what about Don’t Stop Me Now? It kind of keeps with the theme of not stopping something and then fades out into the end so we could seamlessly transfer into Don’t Stop Believing.” Artie says, “And it’s fast enough to have some good dance steps.”
“Well what does everyone think?” Will asks and the kids all agree that that song will be performed. Jesse writes it on the board ahead of Don’t Stop Believing to show the order of the songs.
“What are we going to do as a ballad then?” Finn asks.
“We could do that Aerosmith song?” Will throws out.
“Veto!” Rachel automatically says before anyone has a chance to agree.
“I’m with Rachel on this one Mr. Schue veto.” Kurt says.
Jesse then decides to throw out a suggestion from his favourite band, “We could do Don’t Let Me Down by The Beatles. We could slow the arrangement down and then to cut it short we get rid of the third verse and go straight into Queen. And the good thing with this song for the chorus everyone could join in to give it more power.”
“So are you going to solo the ballad?” Will asks.
“Well I was hoping that Rachel could take the second verse and then the final chorus I hold the ‘don’t let me down’ as someone starts in with the opening lyrics of ‘tonight I’m gonna have myself a real good time’” Jesse answers.
“I think we have our set list Mr. Schue.” Quinn says and Will nods.
“I guess that’s it for today guys. I’ll see what I can do for vocal arrangements and on Monday we can start deciding where solos should go and who does what.” Will says, “Thanks everyone.”
The kids start picking up their bags and Will walks over to Jesse.
“Do you think you can stay behind for a few minutes?” Will asks and Jesse nods.
Rachel stays with Jesse until there are only the three of them left in the music room. She gives his hand a squeeze and with her eyes tells him that she will be waiting outside for him. Will and Jesse are left in the room and the awkward tension surrounds them. Will clears his throat before taking on the role of the adult.
“I’m sorry about what happened on Monday Jesse. I know that I acted inappropriately and that I was wrong to have gone after you like that in front of the entire club.”
Jesse just nods in response.
“I think what makes it even worse is what it forced you to reveal even though you weren’t ready. And shocking as it was to me, I believe you. So I was wondering if you would want to come over for dinner. It would give us a chance to talk, away from the school and everything glee.”
“I would like that a lot.” Jesse says.
“Ok, so tonight at around 7?”
“Sounds good.” Jesse says and Will hands him a paper with his address. “I’ll see you then. Thanks Mis-” Jesse doesn’t know what to call Will, “Thanks.”
Jesse walks out of the room; he doesn’t know what he’s feeling. All he knows is that he is finally going to be able to share his life with his father.