I did grow up to be a free lance artist
Well so far as of graduation this "official" job using my degree thing has fallen relatively flat to date... technically speaking I'm unemployed yet,
these freelance art jobs (despite not advertising nor really speaking to/knowing anyone in the area) keep falling in my lap.
As it stands right now I am working simultaneously on three and was just offered a fourth a few moments ago and theirs been talk with another individual about a potential fifth.
Which is a both a rather strange irony and a mixed blessing. This is what I wanted to do from the beginning. Free Lance Artist. This is why I chose to be the first one in my family to give college a shot. More to improve my knowledge and technical skills as an artist than to receive a degree since the general public who commission my art could care less about the training and ultimately select my services based on my ability.
The degree itself was more a matter of principal and self legitimation. No one in my family immediate or extended had gone to college or completed it. I wanted to prove to myself and others in my family my value and their value and capabilities. I wanted to be someone I could be proud of and for me, with out help or care either way from my family, to me that meant having at least a four year university diploma.
And now I have graduated college and received the diploma that I worked my ass off for 100% on my own.... and I cant find a fucking job with it and am barely able to feed myself on my income... still I'm further fortunate to have found someone who cares for me in a deep and real way and is willing (despite my objections) to buffer my infrequent income with his own keeping my head above water till I find a "regular" job to double on top of my freelance work.
So the draw back is, particularly without a present secondary income, I skirt poverty on a bi-weekly basis :P However I have only been out of school for 5 months and have already begun getting commissioned work (with no effort on my behalf).... this is amazing. This is just the first step in the process the first ripple in the puddle. I'm even doing two for free as a good graces gesture just to spread my net a little further out and secure more recommendations for the future. In retrospect I have achieved exactly what I was hoping for...
I have put myself through school and earned a four year degree. I'm working (fairly frequently in terms of being a new freelance artist) as a freelance artist having several years of training and knowledge behind me. And I have a supportive individual who is more than willing to buttress this "starving artist" in the short term till this avenue and other satisfactory employment fills the financial void.
.. the strangest thing is that I was soooo frustrated that I wasn't finding a "career" in Sociology in my degree field and all the while doing art for money by people who approached me first rather than solicited. I had this image of myself in my head... that if I wasn't applying my degree... if I end up stocking boxes or working in a theater that despite having earned that degree first in my family I would only prove that it was meaningless and so was I. A failure. Until just a few moments ago after being offered the fourth project totally unexpectedly while putting the last touches on the second something tremendously blissful struck me. I am not a failure...quite to the contrary I have almost subconsciously succeeded in achieving exactly my initial life goal at the start of the whole collegiate endeavor. I never wanted to be a sociologist. I love people and nonprofit but I don't want to work in an office and or work with people day in and day out. I love the intellectual aspects of it (which is why I got my degree in it) but never really wanted to work in the field to begin with. My desire had always been to prove I was worthy and capable of putting myself through college and I did so and the degree itself is an accomplishment regardless weather I put it to use particularly if I did so towards a lifetime in a career I hated. My passion, my reason for living, my drive has always been and remains art. When I was a little girl I dreamed of being an artist when I grew up. Through college I planned on having a "regular" shit job as most freelance artists do and working happily in my spare time as a freelance artist after graduation. Well I am. The only piece missing is my shit job. So if I do land an excellent job in my field kudos to me for bonus points.... however, if I don't and push a mop or bag groceries a while its not failure its actually just as I planned it to afford to supply my real income in freelance art.
And so with all that long rambling bs said... I've just realized I am tremendously pleased with where my life is starting to head. Its strategically difficult at the moment but its just started.... and once I get suplimentary income I will have achieved the goals Ive dreamed of since I was a small child... thats incredible to me. Realizing that puts a whole different spin on things and motivates me in an inexpressible way to examine and establish a new set of goals and press towards them.
I am grateful
... ps if you need art let me know... lol :P
-me-
these freelance art jobs (despite not advertising nor really speaking to/knowing anyone in the area) keep falling in my lap.
As it stands right now I am working simultaneously on three and was just offered a fourth a few moments ago and theirs been talk with another individual about a potential fifth.
Which is a both a rather strange irony and a mixed blessing. This is what I wanted to do from the beginning. Free Lance Artist. This is why I chose to be the first one in my family to give college a shot. More to improve my knowledge and technical skills as an artist than to receive a degree since the general public who commission my art could care less about the training and ultimately select my services based on my ability.
The degree itself was more a matter of principal and self legitimation. No one in my family immediate or extended had gone to college or completed it. I wanted to prove to myself and others in my family my value and their value and capabilities. I wanted to be someone I could be proud of and for me, with out help or care either way from my family, to me that meant having at least a four year university diploma.
And now I have graduated college and received the diploma that I worked my ass off for 100% on my own.... and I cant find a fucking job with it and am barely able to feed myself on my income... still I'm further fortunate to have found someone who cares for me in a deep and real way and is willing (despite my objections) to buffer my infrequent income with his own keeping my head above water till I find a "regular" job to double on top of my freelance work.
So the draw back is, particularly without a present secondary income, I skirt poverty on a bi-weekly basis :P However I have only been out of school for 5 months and have already begun getting commissioned work (with no effort on my behalf).... this is amazing. This is just the first step in the process the first ripple in the puddle. I'm even doing two for free as a good graces gesture just to spread my net a little further out and secure more recommendations for the future. In retrospect I have achieved exactly what I was hoping for...
I have put myself through school and earned a four year degree. I'm working (fairly frequently in terms of being a new freelance artist) as a freelance artist having several years of training and knowledge behind me. And I have a supportive individual who is more than willing to buttress this "starving artist" in the short term till this avenue and other satisfactory employment fills the financial void.
.. the strangest thing is that I was soooo frustrated that I wasn't finding a "career" in Sociology in my degree field and all the while doing art for money by people who approached me first rather than solicited. I had this image of myself in my head... that if I wasn't applying my degree... if I end up stocking boxes or working in a theater that despite having earned that degree first in my family I would only prove that it was meaningless and so was I. A failure. Until just a few moments ago after being offered the fourth project totally unexpectedly while putting the last touches on the second something tremendously blissful struck me. I am not a failure...quite to the contrary I have almost subconsciously succeeded in achieving exactly my initial life goal at the start of the whole collegiate endeavor. I never wanted to be a sociologist. I love people and nonprofit but I don't want to work in an office and or work with people day in and day out. I love the intellectual aspects of it (which is why I got my degree in it) but never really wanted to work in the field to begin with. My desire had always been to prove I was worthy and capable of putting myself through college and I did so and the degree itself is an accomplishment regardless weather I put it to use particularly if I did so towards a lifetime in a career I hated. My passion, my reason for living, my drive has always been and remains art. When I was a little girl I dreamed of being an artist when I grew up. Through college I planned on having a "regular" shit job as most freelance artists do and working happily in my spare time as a freelance artist after graduation. Well I am. The only piece missing is my shit job. So if I do land an excellent job in my field kudos to me for bonus points.... however, if I don't and push a mop or bag groceries a while its not failure its actually just as I planned it to afford to supply my real income in freelance art.
And so with all that long rambling bs said... I've just realized I am tremendously pleased with where my life is starting to head. Its strategically difficult at the moment but its just started.... and once I get suplimentary income I will have achieved the goals Ive dreamed of since I was a small child... thats incredible to me. Realizing that puts a whole different spin on things and motivates me in an inexpressible way to examine and establish a new set of goals and press towards them.
I am grateful
... ps if you need art let me know... lol :P
-me-