(no subject)
this is all bullshit ..but im not doing it for you. im doing this for me.
Stop making everything about you. they knew because when it happend i called melanie and said comehome now from queens street she was with aleks and she did you think they comforted me no because no one could. i pushed them away too. i was going to tell you but then i find out you freaked out saying how yu hate everyting and everyone like you always do.
for all you know my father could have died but no time wasnt something you were willing to give.
Fuck you. i lost the one thing that kept me going all this time ..so im sorry if i fell behind on your standards.
Your right i didnt care if you were mad i didnt care if aleks and mel were your friends i didnt fucking care if they were around me i just wanted to be alone. i just wanted to sleep to get away from something you have no idea what about.
Your right paola my mommy did have to take over because guess what that was my point ..that was when i realized i cant do it bymyself i cant handle everything on my own. wow you cried for three hours. try not being able to cry cause you know the one person whos always there isnt there anymore. i dont even fucking care if you dont understand this.
im not higher than you or aleks or mel ..honestly you can have them and thats not because i dont love them its because i dont have the strength to defend myself from you. i dont have the fighting power i give the fuck up. do you get that? when do i ever give up ..i give up I FUCKING GIVE UP. i didnt respond to the letter cause something on it hurt.
i said im not going to fight for aleks cause im not. fuck its not about you. i dont care how much you think i used you. or w.e
fuck that. i know i didnt and thats all that counts. and i love you i dont hate but now..i dont want you. because at my bottom you were to busy thinking about how i was trying to go against you.
do you really think that me when im like that gives a shit about sitting on a thrown while making fun of you.
cause i dont.
I didnt even care when you said you haited me because it was the perfect time to hit me with that cause i was numb. i dont feel anything anymore. and you dont even know why. good.
But im stronger than all this shit and im gonna be fine.
You think your the only person that lost people. please. get use to it cause it happens to everyone.
I cant beleive that because i didnt want to tell you right away you made this into a huge drama with aleks and melanie
let me just unravel them from my "fat finger".
I thougth that the things you would have said in all the things ive read would hurt me......i wish they did ..cause then maybe that would mean i could feel something again.
Im not going to go on with this i hate you no i hate you grade 5 shit.
my life is to short. and things change to fast.
I hope that you live your life to the best. and i hope your happy.
cause ive realized that people change. and sometimes that hurts. but it all works out in the end...... it has to.
im sorry. at least your getting an apology from the person who hurt you...
goodbye
Stop making everything about you. they knew because when it happend i called melanie and said comehome now from queens street she was with aleks and she did you think they comforted me no because no one could. i pushed them away too. i was going to tell you but then i find out you freaked out saying how yu hate everyting and everyone like you always do.
for all you know my father could have died but no time wasnt something you were willing to give.
Fuck you. i lost the one thing that kept me going all this time ..so im sorry if i fell behind on your standards.
Your right i didnt care if you were mad i didnt care if aleks and mel were your friends i didnt fucking care if they were around me i just wanted to be alone. i just wanted to sleep to get away from something you have no idea what about.
Your right paola my mommy did have to take over because guess what that was my point ..that was when i realized i cant do it bymyself i cant handle everything on my own. wow you cried for three hours. try not being able to cry cause you know the one person whos always there isnt there anymore. i dont even fucking care if you dont understand this.
im not higher than you or aleks or mel ..honestly you can have them and thats not because i dont love them its because i dont have the strength to defend myself from you. i dont have the fighting power i give the fuck up. do you get that? when do i ever give up ..i give up I FUCKING GIVE UP. i didnt respond to the letter cause something on it hurt.
i said im not going to fight for aleks cause im not. fuck its not about you. i dont care how much you think i used you. or w.e
fuck that. i know i didnt and thats all that counts. and i love you i dont hate but now..i dont want you. because at my bottom you were to busy thinking about how i was trying to go against you.
do you really think that me when im like that gives a shit about sitting on a thrown while making fun of you.
cause i dont.
I didnt even care when you said you haited me because it was the perfect time to hit me with that cause i was numb. i dont feel anything anymore. and you dont even know why. good.
But im stronger than all this shit and im gonna be fine.
You think your the only person that lost people. please. get use to it cause it happens to everyone.
I cant beleive that because i didnt want to tell you right away you made this into a huge drama with aleks and melanie
let me just unravel them from my "fat finger".
I thougth that the things you would have said in all the things ive read would hurt me......i wish they did ..cause then maybe that would mean i could feel something again.
Im not going to go on with this i hate you no i hate you grade 5 shit.
my life is to short. and things change to fast.
I hope that you live your life to the best. and i hope your happy.
cause ive realized that people change. and sometimes that hurts. but it all works out in the end...... it has to.
im sorry. at least your getting an apology from the person who hurt you...
goodbye