(no subject)
Arguments We Had (That got me thrown out of a library)
(Microbiology work)
(Phone rings)
(Glaring)
(Scrambling for the stupid thing)
Me: (Whispers)"Hello?"
Him: "Tell me why there is a child on my couch."
Me: "Uh."
Him: "It's asking me questions."
Me: "She's the neighbor's. They're painting the house and I said she could play the Wii at our house and stay out of their hair. The rest of the house is locked up, she can only access the living room and the kitchen." (Yes, we live in a very weird house, you can shut up whole sections)
(I can hear the girl in the background)
Him: "Does it ever shut up? It keeps talking to me."
Me: "Play Mario Kart with her or something."
Him: "You know children make me nervous."
Me: "Oh gawd, she's eight, she's not a baby. You will be fine."
Little Girl: "Why do you have such a weird name? My daddy says it's because your parents aren't Americans and they name their kids weird stuff."
Him: "Stop talking to me."
Little Girl: "Are you a Muslim? Daddy says he thinks you are, because of the thing on the wall." (His grandmother made him an elaborate prayer rug when he was young, and it's hanging on the wall)
Him: "I am not a Muslim."
Me: "Saeed, please, just deal with it."
(Librarian looming over me)
(Back at home)
Little Girl: "He's grouchy."
Me: "He is."
Little Girl: "Like a bear."
Me: "...Yes. Yes he is."
Little Girl: "I want to be Princess Peach!"
Him: "Does it ever shut up?"
Little Girl: "Mommy says you're too nice for him."
Me: "Does she now?"
Him: "Little thing, shut up now, or I will find something large to feed you to."
Me: "Aw, and your mom wants us to have kids."
(Microbiology work)
(Phone rings)
(Glaring)
(Scrambling for the stupid thing)
Me: (Whispers)"Hello?"
Him: "Tell me why there is a child on my couch."
Me: "Uh."
Him: "It's asking me questions."
Me: "She's the neighbor's. They're painting the house and I said she could play the Wii at our house and stay out of their hair. The rest of the house is locked up, she can only access the living room and the kitchen." (Yes, we live in a very weird house, you can shut up whole sections)
(I can hear the girl in the background)
Him: "Does it ever shut up? It keeps talking to me."
Me: "Play Mario Kart with her or something."
Him: "You know children make me nervous."
Me: "Oh gawd, she's eight, she's not a baby. You will be fine."
Little Girl: "Why do you have such a weird name? My daddy says it's because your parents aren't Americans and they name their kids weird stuff."
Him: "Stop talking to me."
Little Girl: "Are you a Muslim? Daddy says he thinks you are, because of the thing on the wall." (His grandmother made him an elaborate prayer rug when he was young, and it's hanging on the wall)
Him: "I am not a Muslim."
Me: "Saeed, please, just deal with it."
(Librarian looming over me)
(Back at home)
Little Girl: "He's grouchy."
Me: "He is."
Little Girl: "Like a bear."
Me: "...Yes. Yes he is."
Little Girl: "I want to be Princess Peach!"
Him: "Does it ever shut up?"
Little Girl: "Mommy says you're too nice for him."
Me: "Does she now?"
Him: "Little thing, shut up now, or I will find something large to feed you to."
Me: "Aw, and your mom wants us to have kids."