Whatever happened to common sense?
What to do, What to do, What to do...
I had another dream... I can't remember what it was, but I think it was good. All I remember is that I didn't want to get up... Perhaps it was my mystery man again? It's sad, because I don't remember and I don't think I remembered to ask who he was either... ARGH. =(
Basically I got up, had breakfast, texted Andy to let her know about the Wasabi thing for Sunday... It pisses me off that no one has told me a time. I had to call the restaurant to ask about there times because Maria said she wanted to plan it around 2 hours before closing time. Of course I didn't get an answer because no one picked up. I told Andy just to come to my house at 5:00pm so we can both be driven there at whatever time... It would be easier. I hope she can come.
We talked last night and I told her I was still upset for how she treated me. Of course she apologized again but she did something I wasn't expecting... Saying I was such an amazing person, how I'm really the most closest one to her and that I know things her parents don't know... It really made me feel happy about how she thought about me...
It really makes me sad sometimes... I really want to try and push myself away from her so the hurting will stop, but when she talks to me like that, I feel like I'm the most important person in the world and I only care about her opinion on me... It makes me sad and I still love her. There’s still a lot of difficult emotions inside of me that tug on me on each end like a tug-o-war... I’m doing my best to still be her friend (I still want to know her and still talk to her of course) but it’s so difficult on me, because the part that still loves her makes me feel so melancholy that I’ll never have her back... It feels like I’ll never love someone else as much as I loved her... I know that statement won't be true eventually, but I keep telling myself that... It makes me choke and hurt each time I say that to myself or repeat it...
I feel pathetic as well, because I dwell on this a lot and I don't want people to get annoyed with me. I still feel so hurt of this whole situation and it eats me up inside... When I do manage to distract myself to not think of Andy, it makes me so sad because I don't WANT to forget her. I feel that I need to push myself away for it to be healthy for me, but the aching inside of my heart wants to still be close to her even as a friend to still know and talk with her...
Well...back to my day...
I had a nice refreshing shower and then Mom took me out to eat at Kelsey's. I had some of those toast thingies to dip in spinich dip, with a small caesar salad and beacon hamburger. Yeah... I only had strawberry yogurt for breakfast, so I was hungry.
After eating, we went to Chapters and I was picking different Manga off of the shelves and skimming over a lot of them. I found the 2nd volume of the Light-Novel of the Strawberry Panic! series. The book was so tiny. After Chapters we went to Winners to buy Grandma some birthday gifts.
We came home and I plopped myself at the computer. I continued to read this BDSM story I've been reading since yesterday and it's really gotten interesting. I'm almost done it. I'm hoping to finish it tonight.
There isn't much else I'm doing right now...
A while back my eyes were hurting a lot. I checked them out in the washroom and I found out that they're all blood-shot. I suppose some blood vessels broke from me staring at the computer so much... Owie...
Kiska and I weren't so talkitive. Perhaps she was busy? She signed off a while ago. OH! JoJo has a LiveJournal account and I didn't know! I added him and that made me a happy Tane.
I think I'll continue reading that story... If nothing else interesting happens on the computer I want to start reading Eclipse that I borrowed from Sarah. I really can't wait to read Breaking Dawn.
My eyes feel fine now... @__@;;
I had another dream... I can't remember what it was, but I think it was good. All I remember is that I didn't want to get up... Perhaps it was my mystery man again? It's sad, because I don't remember and I don't think I remembered to ask who he was either... ARGH. =(
Basically I got up, had breakfast, texted Andy to let her know about the Wasabi thing for Sunday... It pisses me off that no one has told me a time. I had to call the restaurant to ask about there times because Maria said she wanted to plan it around 2 hours before closing time. Of course I didn't get an answer because no one picked up. I told Andy just to come to my house at 5:00pm so we can both be driven there at whatever time... It would be easier. I hope she can come.
We talked last night and I told her I was still upset for how she treated me. Of course she apologized again but she did something I wasn't expecting... Saying I was such an amazing person, how I'm really the most closest one to her and that I know things her parents don't know... It really made me feel happy about how she thought about me...
It really makes me sad sometimes... I really want to try and push myself away from her so the hurting will stop, but when she talks to me like that, I feel like I'm the most important person in the world and I only care about her opinion on me... It makes me sad and I still love her. There’s still a lot of difficult emotions inside of me that tug on me on each end like a tug-o-war... I’m doing my best to still be her friend (I still want to know her and still talk to her of course) but it’s so difficult on me, because the part that still loves her makes me feel so melancholy that I’ll never have her back... It feels like I’ll never love someone else as much as I loved her... I know that statement won't be true eventually, but I keep telling myself that... It makes me choke and hurt each time I say that to myself or repeat it...
I feel pathetic as well, because I dwell on this a lot and I don't want people to get annoyed with me. I still feel so hurt of this whole situation and it eats me up inside... When I do manage to distract myself to not think of Andy, it makes me so sad because I don't WANT to forget her. I feel that I need to push myself away for it to be healthy for me, but the aching inside of my heart wants to still be close to her even as a friend to still know and talk with her...
Well...back to my day...
I had a nice refreshing shower and then Mom took me out to eat at Kelsey's. I had some of those toast thingies to dip in spinich dip, with a small caesar salad and beacon hamburger. Yeah... I only had strawberry yogurt for breakfast, so I was hungry.
After eating, we went to Chapters and I was picking different Manga off of the shelves and skimming over a lot of them. I found the 2nd volume of the Light-Novel of the Strawberry Panic! series. The book was so tiny. After Chapters we went to Winners to buy Grandma some birthday gifts.
We came home and I plopped myself at the computer. I continued to read this BDSM story I've been reading since yesterday and it's really gotten interesting. I'm almost done it. I'm hoping to finish it tonight.
There isn't much else I'm doing right now...
A while back my eyes were hurting a lot. I checked them out in the washroom and I found out that they're all blood-shot. I suppose some blood vessels broke from me staring at the computer so much... Owie...
Kiska and I weren't so talkitive. Perhaps she was busy? She signed off a while ago. OH! JoJo has a LiveJournal account and I didn't know! I added him and that made me a happy Tane.
I think I'll continue reading that story... If nothing else interesting happens on the computer I want to start reading Eclipse that I borrowed from Sarah. I really can't wait to read Breaking Dawn.
My eyes feel fine now... @__@;;