Friendless on the net?!
Hello.. Well hello to the few people who are actually there, who are... 2? 3? I dunno how, I meet interesting people and in no time they disappear. People I was slowly getting to love just leave, and I get no emails/comments/msn chats with them anymore. Therefore, I will post my random stuff here as usual, with the thought in mind no one will read (oh Aya, Haru, I know you will, thanks!);I have gotten the card of the psychologist of the University so I may book an appointment. I really need some help, I think I am going insane or something, I am so sad lately. I have this pessimistic feeling, and my poor friends are exhausted *hugs Aya again*;Ok this is not the best way of attracting people, but hell that's life. Sometimes you are good, sometimes you aren't. And I'm not right now...
I wrote a rather depressing poem yesterday. You may want to
Yes, the addresee is Kyô. Why? Because i have been seeing the Dir en Grey live in Europe video, and I loved so much being able to watch the Paris concert I attended again!! Kyô looks really hot, they all are.&
ALL THE FLOWERS HAVE WITHERED
All the flowers have withered
Before blooming
And their child-like buds are covered
In spring frost.
I hold an image of destruction
On my constantly scratched hands;
And I want to join the “monster”(1)
In his purification of blood.
Nothing makes sense anymore,
I see myself decay.
The carefully-built crystal world
Is shattering
All its fragments
Cover me with a transparent impassivity
Masking the pain.
I am not a witness of ruin
I am a sacrifice.
I am the rose that withers at the altar
Forgotten in the dusty church.
Under a beech tree
I’m waiting for the death fowls
To eat the remnants of my heart.
I water the ground with my tears
But the catharsis won’t arrive.
* * *
I want to be up your synthetic throne (2),
Screaming with you
Savouring blood.
Mirrored on your chest
My contorted face yells back.
We are the miserable well-offs
Addicted to infernal lullabies;
Searching bodies
Desperate souls.
I am no more than a fainting spirit
You are the saddest almighty being on earth.
With bleeding words
I worship you
As reality treads on me,
And I’m going beyond sanity
Into the darkness, alone.
(1) Kyô is often referred to as “warumono”, which means more or less “monster”
(2) Yes, the stage, guys. Everytime I say “you”, I mean Kyô. He’s such a good listener, I’ve tied him to my bed.
I wrote a rather depressing poem yesterday. You may want to
Yes, the addresee is Kyô. Why? Because i have been seeing the Dir en Grey live in Europe video, and I loved so much being able to watch the Paris concert I attended again!! Kyô looks really hot, they all are.&
ALL THE FLOWERS HAVE WITHERED
All the flowers have withered
Before blooming
And their child-like buds are covered
In spring frost.
I hold an image of destruction
On my constantly scratched hands;
And I want to join the “monster”(1)
In his purification of blood.
Nothing makes sense anymore,
I see myself decay.
The carefully-built crystal world
Is shattering
All its fragments
Cover me with a transparent impassivity
Masking the pain.
I am not a witness of ruin
I am a sacrifice.
I am the rose that withers at the altar
Forgotten in the dusty church.
Under a beech tree
I’m waiting for the death fowls
To eat the remnants of my heart.
I water the ground with my tears
But the catharsis won’t arrive.
* * *
I want to be up your synthetic throne (2),
Screaming with you
Savouring blood.
Mirrored on your chest
My contorted face yells back.
We are the miserable well-offs
Addicted to infernal lullabies;
Searching bodies
Desperate souls.
I am no more than a fainting spirit
You are the saddest almighty being on earth.
With bleeding words
I worship you
As reality treads on me,
And I’m going beyond sanity
Into the darkness, alone.
(1) Kyô is often referred to as “warumono”, which means more or less “monster”
(2) Yes, the stage, guys. Everytime I say “you”, I mean Kyô. He’s such a good listener, I’ve tied him to my bed.