Cross post...
From my other journal..which I don't update much..but WAY more recently than this one. So..I'm back anyway..
First off: http://www.greatestjournal.com/users/penguinqueen/ My OTHER journal.
Second off..my X-post:)
http://sports.espn.go.com/espn/page2/story?page=simmons/040514 ( for the full column)
This is the bit that had me rolling on the floor:
"
Q: So Adam Sandler and Chris Rock are headlining a remake of "The Longest Yard." Sandler is playing the part of Paul Crewe ... aka, Burt Reynolds. Now, Reynolds is a former football player; a '70s sex-symbol; the masculine icon for that decade. So naturally, the choice to replace him is ... Adam Sandler? Are they kidding?
--Jeff, Shawnee, Kansas
SG: Here's what bothers me: Why remake something that was great in the first place? They could never top the original "Longest Yard." It's impossible. And they know that. So the only way it could make money was to make it more of a comedy, which is how Sandler and Rock became involved. But since they're already losing out on every sports movie fan who loved the original one and would never support a bastardized version, that means they'll try to "mainstream" it and appeal to everyone, which can't possibly work. And then you have Sandler playing Paul Crewe, which is like remaking "The Shining" with Chris Klein. What a disaster.
If they really want to remake a movie from the '70s or '80s, why not pick a memorable idea that either A) didn't quite work for whatever reason, or B) has a theme that needs to be re-explored? I would pick these five:
1. "Silent Rage" -- Doctors bring an evil serial killer back to life ... now he's indestructable and running amok in a small Texas town. And only the sheriff can save the day. So here's my question: Which A-list action hero wouldn't play the sheriff? Doesn't this have The Rock written all over it?
2. "The Running Man" -- Fantastic idea, didn't quite work. I'm not sure if the special effects were lousy, or if Richard Dawson was a little too over-the-top. Maybe it was a little of both. By the way, the lead character in that movie? Now my governor. It's true. I know, I know ... hard to believe. Imagine how we feel. He's taken 35 vacations in six months. He's not kidding when he says "I'll be back," he just keeps forgetting to add "... from Hawaii, in about seven days."
3. "Escape from New York" -- Believe me, I loved this movie. It's in my top 50 all time. I just want to see what would happen with a $200 million budget and 21st-century special effects. It's worth thinking about, anyway. And what about Vin Diesel as Snake Plissken? Or is the Vin Diesel Era officially over? Can I get a ruling on this?
4. "Teen Wolf" -- Not as a movie ... but as a TV show. Seriously, who wouldn't watch "Teen Wolf" every week? It would be like a cross between "One Tree Hill" and "Alf." Sign me up.
5. "The Breakfast Club" -- They should remake this every 20 years. Just to see where we're at with high school kids. For instance, these days, Molly Ringwald's character couldn't be a virgin, simply because that species has gone extinct in high school. Maybe they could say that she's never been in a three-way before, or she's the only girl in her group who doesn't have a tongue piercing and a tattoo of a rose garden in the small of her back.
(By the way, if somebody remakes this movie, please remove the scene when Emilio Estevez's character breaks the library conference room window with his scream. Just trust me.)"
First off: http://www.greatestjournal.com/users/penguinqueen/ My OTHER journal.
Second off..my X-post:)
http://sports.espn.go.com/espn/page2/story?page=simmons/040514 ( for the full column)
This is the bit that had me rolling on the floor:
"
Q: So Adam Sandler and Chris Rock are headlining a remake of "The Longest Yard." Sandler is playing the part of Paul Crewe ... aka, Burt Reynolds. Now, Reynolds is a former football player; a '70s sex-symbol; the masculine icon for that decade. So naturally, the choice to replace him is ... Adam Sandler? Are they kidding?
--Jeff, Shawnee, Kansas
SG: Here's what bothers me: Why remake something that was great in the first place? They could never top the original "Longest Yard." It's impossible. And they know that. So the only way it could make money was to make it more of a comedy, which is how Sandler and Rock became involved. But since they're already losing out on every sports movie fan who loved the original one and would never support a bastardized version, that means they'll try to "mainstream" it and appeal to everyone, which can't possibly work. And then you have Sandler playing Paul Crewe, which is like remaking "The Shining" with Chris Klein. What a disaster.
If they really want to remake a movie from the '70s or '80s, why not pick a memorable idea that either A) didn't quite work for whatever reason, or B) has a theme that needs to be re-explored? I would pick these five:
1. "Silent Rage" -- Doctors bring an evil serial killer back to life ... now he's indestructable and running amok in a small Texas town. And only the sheriff can save the day. So here's my question: Which A-list action hero wouldn't play the sheriff? Doesn't this have The Rock written all over it?
2. "The Running Man" -- Fantastic idea, didn't quite work. I'm not sure if the special effects were lousy, or if Richard Dawson was a little too over-the-top. Maybe it was a little of both. By the way, the lead character in that movie? Now my governor. It's true. I know, I know ... hard to believe. Imagine how we feel. He's taken 35 vacations in six months. He's not kidding when he says "I'll be back," he just keeps forgetting to add "... from Hawaii, in about seven days."
3. "Escape from New York" -- Believe me, I loved this movie. It's in my top 50 all time. I just want to see what would happen with a $200 million budget and 21st-century special effects. It's worth thinking about, anyway. And what about Vin Diesel as Snake Plissken? Or is the Vin Diesel Era officially over? Can I get a ruling on this?
4. "Teen Wolf" -- Not as a movie ... but as a TV show. Seriously, who wouldn't watch "Teen Wolf" every week? It would be like a cross between "One Tree Hill" and "Alf." Sign me up.
5. "The Breakfast Club" -- They should remake this every 20 years. Just to see where we're at with high school kids. For instance, these days, Molly Ringwald's character couldn't be a virgin, simply because that species has gone extinct in high school. Maybe they could say that she's never been in a three-way before, or she's the only girl in her group who doesn't have a tongue piercing and a tattoo of a rose garden in the small of her back.
(By the way, if somebody remakes this movie, please remove the scene when Emilio Estevez's character breaks the library conference room window with his scream. Just trust me.)"