(no subject)
ATTN: this journal is going to be deleted until further notice. why? because an anonymous source told my family about my drug "problems" through this website.
so im leaving with a couple of off-beat remarks in hopes of calming my nerves and then it will be deleted within 12 hours.
i can't pull my shit together if my life depended upon it. all the important elements of my life are falling apart.
i hate this.
all i want to do is work so that i can save money and eventually get the hell out of this place. im being nieve because it's fairly obvious that the same thing is going to happen to me if i move to another town. but that's besides the point, i just want to be far far away.
and all i can think about is chris and it's awful how i worry about him more than i do myself.
last night i had a dream that chris got back with ariel. it would be nice if i could sleep and forget about that.. but i can't fall asleep and i can't forget about it because i just keep thinking about the distance between us and what he could be doing right now.
i can't trust many people.
i miss kensey.
i need a shower.
the weather here sucks.
update: i have at least 3 thousand dollars from graduation and a new imac g5 17" flat screen monitor to show off. i have also been getting ridiculously drunk for the past 4 nights in a row and tonight, im sober and hating it.
bye bye. regurgitate
so im leaving with a couple of off-beat remarks in hopes of calming my nerves and then it will be deleted within 12 hours.
i can't pull my shit together if my life depended upon it. all the important elements of my life are falling apart.
i hate this.
all i want to do is work so that i can save money and eventually get the hell out of this place. im being nieve because it's fairly obvious that the same thing is going to happen to me if i move to another town. but that's besides the point, i just want to be far far away.
and all i can think about is chris and it's awful how i worry about him more than i do myself.
last night i had a dream that chris got back with ariel. it would be nice if i could sleep and forget about that.. but i can't fall asleep and i can't forget about it because i just keep thinking about the distance between us and what he could be doing right now.
i can't trust many people.
i miss kensey.
i need a shower.
the weather here sucks.
update: i have at least 3 thousand dollars from graduation and a new imac g5 17" flat screen monitor to show off. i have also been getting ridiculously drunk for the past 4 nights in a row and tonight, im sober and hating it.
bye bye. regurgitate