FUCK YOU, thank you. I love you all.
Fuck.
Fuck Pat.
He's a douche.
I hate that I care what he thinks. I hate that I'm that half of all the girls he's ever been with that's still fighting for his attention. I just want things to be better again. Like they used to. I was safe then, but still felt like I was rebelling. Now, I'm just floating. I don't know where I'm going, but the tides of everyone's anger keeps me flowing.
I hate him. I hate him for not caring. For not trying. For not understanding. For not listening.
I want to make waffles at three in the morning again. I want to spend all night talking. I want to watch Fraggle Rock in the same chair. I want to be pinned down and tickled just because he knows I hate it. I want to threaten to beat him in any game, then lose at most of them. I want him to tell me endless pointless facts that I never cared to hear in the first place. I want him to try and impress me. I want him to kiss me. Only him. No one else is living up to this new standard that's been set. I don't know if I want anyone else. Not right now. I want to go away to school. I want to meet new people. I want to forget about a lot of people.
I don't have his pants anymore. I shouldn't have given them back. I'll never get back my hoodie or my DVDs. I should have kept them.
Fuck Pat for making a scene. Fuck him for acting more like a girl than I am. Fuck him for overreacting and not even bothering to try and keep me as a friend.
Fuck.
Fuck Pat.
He's a douche.
hate.
Fuck Pat.
He's a douche.
I hate that I care what he thinks. I hate that I'm that half of all the girls he's ever been with that's still fighting for his attention. I just want things to be better again. Like they used to. I was safe then, but still felt like I was rebelling. Now, I'm just floating. I don't know where I'm going, but the tides of everyone's anger keeps me flowing.
I hate him. I hate him for not caring. For not trying. For not understanding. For not listening.
I want to make waffles at three in the morning again. I want to spend all night talking. I want to watch Fraggle Rock in the same chair. I want to be pinned down and tickled just because he knows I hate it. I want to threaten to beat him in any game, then lose at most of them. I want him to tell me endless pointless facts that I never cared to hear in the first place. I want him to try and impress me. I want him to kiss me. Only him. No one else is living up to this new standard that's been set. I don't know if I want anyone else. Not right now. I want to go away to school. I want to meet new people. I want to forget about a lot of people.
I don't have his pants anymore. I shouldn't have given them back. I'll never get back my hoodie or my DVDs. I should have kept them.
Fuck Pat for making a scene. Fuck him for acting more like a girl than I am. Fuck him for overreacting and not even bothering to try and keep me as a friend.
Fuck.
Fuck Pat.
He's a douche.
hate.