The difficulty of change
The past few weeks have been troubled. My work status is bothering me to no end, the pressure, my decision to try and find something else, the realization I don't know what that "something else" actually means, and than my dad's birthday party on Tuesday, to which I need to make a nice presentation.
And then "Divergent" hit.
And again, in a time of troubled thought and change, like five years ago (oh god), I submege myself in a story which slithers through me, and I thought "Well, stories come when you need them, and the change that comes with them helps", but what if it's just a defense mechanism? Just something to run to, because I don't want to deal, or.
Or something to let my mind the time it needs to, do, what? Heal? Decide?
(I won't use the "What am I supposed to do" icon. Not yet, which says I'm still better than the worst).
And then "Divergent" hit.
And again, in a time of troubled thought and change, like five years ago (oh god), I submege myself in a story which slithers through me, and I thought "Well, stories come when you need them, and the change that comes with them helps", but what if it's just a defense mechanism? Just something to run to, because I don't want to deal, or.
Or something to let my mind the time it needs to, do, what? Heal? Decide?
(I won't use the "What am I supposed to do" icon. Not yet, which says I'm still better than the worst).