so now what?
ok, so heres the latest
spoke to leechy last night, fuck is he mad at me. I dont know how to explain it to him other than I didn't know that what I was doing was wrong in his eyes. I thought that when we spoke on the phone, and he told me he didnt want a relationship but we couldnt see other people, he was joking. I cant actually understand what happened. I love that boy more than anything. he keeps me sane, and simple, and loved and cared for. i wish i could say sorry enough times. I dont know whats happening with andre, but it makes no difference at all at this point. I want leechy's forgiveness, his voice, his smile, his happiness.
Im just a total fuck-up. i really am. I dont know why i was ever allowed to exist. Purely to fuck things up with boys and hurt them and destroy their trust in me.
BUT I DIDNT MEAN TO!!!! I love leechy so much that it hurts me to sleep, to breathe to eat. someone help me? someone please just tell me that it will blow over, and go away.
tell me that leechy will find it in his heart to love me, and make the bond between us better and stronger.
I sent off his V-day gift today. Its really cute and cheesy, but its definitely practical. And thats what he wanted. I got camp pictures developed, they're awesome. and i just want everything else to settle down. Eliza, please call me again, but ill be asleep from about 11pm my time from now on, thats about 4pm your time. So anytime before then is good
I had my first lecture today for those that care. It was good. the english lecturers seem to know what they're doing, and they're really funny sometimes too.
R415 for a psychology textbook??? what the fuck???? oh well
let that be the least of my worries considering daddy is paying for it.
love you all
tammy
spoke to leechy last night, fuck is he mad at me. I dont know how to explain it to him other than I didn't know that what I was doing was wrong in his eyes. I thought that when we spoke on the phone, and he told me he didnt want a relationship but we couldnt see other people, he was joking. I cant actually understand what happened. I love that boy more than anything. he keeps me sane, and simple, and loved and cared for. i wish i could say sorry enough times. I dont know whats happening with andre, but it makes no difference at all at this point. I want leechy's forgiveness, his voice, his smile, his happiness.
Im just a total fuck-up. i really am. I dont know why i was ever allowed to exist. Purely to fuck things up with boys and hurt them and destroy their trust in me.
BUT I DIDNT MEAN TO!!!! I love leechy so much that it hurts me to sleep, to breathe to eat. someone help me? someone please just tell me that it will blow over, and go away.
tell me that leechy will find it in his heart to love me, and make the bond between us better and stronger.
I sent off his V-day gift today. Its really cute and cheesy, but its definitely practical. And thats what he wanted. I got camp pictures developed, they're awesome. and i just want everything else to settle down. Eliza, please call me again, but ill be asleep from about 11pm my time from now on, thats about 4pm your time. So anytime before then is good
I had my first lecture today for those that care. It was good. the english lecturers seem to know what they're doing, and they're really funny sometimes too.
R415 for a psychology textbook??? what the fuck???? oh well
let that be the least of my worries considering daddy is paying for it.
love you all
tammy