Dramatics I give you all, because you love them.
Hey Gang! Here I am, posting in this long forgotten corner of the web. Bet you're all shocked right now aren't you? I am, as ever, simply the most horrible updater, this may infact be the longest I have ever gone without adding an entry in this hideous thing known as a Blog. Ah that word blog, it seems to conjure up some image of a sickening black and green mire, rife with stagnant words bubbling through its mucky surface. Despite spending the vast majority of my life infront of this machine I neglect you fellows on a regular basis, the waters of bloggery just don't seem tempting to swim in on most occasions. Mostly because I choose to spare you all from my ramblings, I don't even like spending time in my head, why should you?
I oft' bide my time until I feel I have a reason to type words to my gentle readership, those acquaintances who still allow me to provide their own journals with my snide remarks. A sort of strange guilt rose up from deep within' my thoracic cavity, I struggled to quell the beast, but to no avail. It's voracious maw must be sated with the blood of my LJ readership, I must cast you into the swamplike landscape, the beast commands it. Being as I am a minion to the gods of apathy and loathing, their sort of play thing, I'm guessing you would make the assumption I would have something to complain about right now. That assumption would have been correct many a moon ago, I've in the past vented my frustrations on this medium, spewing digital bile forth through my text. From my finger tips I stabbed at the world, through electricity, to light, to your eyes and resting finally in your brain where that rhetoric would, with all hopes burrow its greedy little paws and await its time to BURST FORTH anew! But on this day you are wrong, I've no subject so to speak, no muse to my meandering. As this beast, this creature of guilt, reared up on his hind tentacles, I began to wonder, what exactly is it that I should talk about. What about me, or my existence could possibly interest others. Daily I read your collective exploits, joys and heartbreaks. Myself and the LJ update beast observe your lives on here. However when it comes to my own festering existence you are all met with only silence. To that end I feel sort of bad, here I struggle to coagulate the words to feed our dear tendriled friend. Should I feel obligated to renew my usage of this page, or is my responsibility simply an illusion cooked up by those aforementioned apathy gods I must kowtow before.
These deitys ever bent on breaking my will, until the all familiar clack of the keys brings us to where we stand now. "Do people really care, I actively read the friends page, is that not enough for these rabid digital masses" I question. Paradoxically here I am updating about not updating, as you may have gathered, I am infact alive, it is tough to say of my wellness. Need I say more than that.
From my last post, approaching a year ago I moved back to Ontario. I did infact FINALLY get my birthcertificate after a long ordeal, the government still isn't giving me my GST cheques despite the address change, and those in power wouldn't provide me with a license without redoing all the tests, so I've kept my valid Alberta one, not that it matters as I have no vehicle and have little inclination to get one. That saga has come to a close of sorts.
As for employment I'm working at a job that I am not fond, I make no money there, and even now this one is. I am now on the great precipice, as the economy forces me out of a job having since destroyed two careers. I fear for the worst, and my savings have all but dried up. I job hunt to little result, and my will to do so is constantly met with the all encompassing loathing for having to do it. I'd honestly like to do something that makes me happy, but its hard for me to understand what happiness is. C'est La Vie!
I... just changed my mind, I was thinking about attempting to shed some "light" on this perceived dreary world I inhabit, where I struggle not to be a spectre of misery. You know, that place you must think I live where terrifying black nimbus clouds blot out the light from the sky. I try to stay positive, trust me, its just a losing battle, a struggle often over before it begins. The hill of happiness is mud slick and the rain to heavy to bare at times. More and more the things that once gave my enjoyment transform into pure frustration. The deed is done, the words are typed, I can now return myself to monotony. As such I will spare you these ramblings for a time, perhaps when next that LJ update guilt rears its ugly head we will be on better terms and actually have something to talk about. Know that I love you all and until that day, I bid you all adieu.
Cheese is still really quite tasty.
I oft' bide my time until I feel I have a reason to type words to my gentle readership, those acquaintances who still allow me to provide their own journals with my snide remarks. A sort of strange guilt rose up from deep within' my thoracic cavity, I struggled to quell the beast, but to no avail. It's voracious maw must be sated with the blood of my LJ readership, I must cast you into the swamplike landscape, the beast commands it. Being as I am a minion to the gods of apathy and loathing, their sort of play thing, I'm guessing you would make the assumption I would have something to complain about right now. That assumption would have been correct many a moon ago, I've in the past vented my frustrations on this medium, spewing digital bile forth through my text. From my finger tips I stabbed at the world, through electricity, to light, to your eyes and resting finally in your brain where that rhetoric would, with all hopes burrow its greedy little paws and await its time to BURST FORTH anew! But on this day you are wrong, I've no subject so to speak, no muse to my meandering. As this beast, this creature of guilt, reared up on his hind tentacles, I began to wonder, what exactly is it that I should talk about. What about me, or my existence could possibly interest others. Daily I read your collective exploits, joys and heartbreaks. Myself and the LJ update beast observe your lives on here. However when it comes to my own festering existence you are all met with only silence. To that end I feel sort of bad, here I struggle to coagulate the words to feed our dear tendriled friend. Should I feel obligated to renew my usage of this page, or is my responsibility simply an illusion cooked up by those aforementioned apathy gods I must kowtow before.
These deitys ever bent on breaking my will, until the all familiar clack of the keys brings us to where we stand now. "Do people really care, I actively read the friends page, is that not enough for these rabid digital masses" I question. Paradoxically here I am updating about not updating, as you may have gathered, I am infact alive, it is tough to say of my wellness. Need I say more than that.
From my last post, approaching a year ago I moved back to Ontario. I did infact FINALLY get my birthcertificate after a long ordeal, the government still isn't giving me my GST cheques despite the address change, and those in power wouldn't provide me with a license without redoing all the tests, so I've kept my valid Alberta one, not that it matters as I have no vehicle and have little inclination to get one. That saga has come to a close of sorts.
As for employment I'm working at a job that I am not fond, I make no money there, and even now this one is. I am now on the great precipice, as the economy forces me out of a job having since destroyed two careers. I fear for the worst, and my savings have all but dried up. I job hunt to little result, and my will to do so is constantly met with the all encompassing loathing for having to do it. I'd honestly like to do something that makes me happy, but its hard for me to understand what happiness is. C'est La Vie!
I... just changed my mind, I was thinking about attempting to shed some "light" on this perceived dreary world I inhabit, where I struggle not to be a spectre of misery. You know, that place you must think I live where terrifying black nimbus clouds blot out the light from the sky. I try to stay positive, trust me, its just a losing battle, a struggle often over before it begins. The hill of happiness is mud slick and the rain to heavy to bare at times. More and more the things that once gave my enjoyment transform into pure frustration. The deed is done, the words are typed, I can now return myself to monotony. As such I will spare you these ramblings for a time, perhaps when next that LJ update guilt rears its ugly head we will be on better terms and actually have something to talk about. Know that I love you all and until that day, I bid you all adieu.
Cheese is still really quite tasty.