The old post messed up; copied it to here. I hate LJ sometimes
I could be leaving at any time, so this may be cut a tad short ;p
First and foremost, yes, Veronica and I are still together and happier then ever. In fact, we're engaged and the wedding date is, thusfar, June 27th of next summer.
I got a letter a little under a week ago that made one of my life's dreams absolutely possible: not only am I accepted at my dream college, Mount Vernon Nazarene University, but the government is willing to pay the entire $25,040 a year tuition!! Yes, this is putting a tremendous amount of stress on me....been running my ass off non-stop since I got the letter, preparing for the big move down there tomorrow. I still haven't packed....procrastinators, unite tomorrow!....but I'll work on that tonight. I have to launder my clothes and pack them as soon as they're dry, probably being on the computer for one last time or getting in a bit of God of War II. I'll pack up my TV and computer tomorrow morning, as they shouldn't be too hard to pack, and go see Veronica one last time before heading off to my biggest adventure yet.
Ver's taking this hard, I know she is. The past few days have been literally tear-soaked; I love her with all my heart, but I simply cannot throw this away. That, and I made a promise to myself years and years ago....when I visited my sister at Mount Vernon....that this was my college. I fell in love with it, and promised myself that if I could ever attend, I would. Of course, the tuition cost was what kept those dreams just that....dreams. I knew I'd never, ever, afford it. But now that it's a reality....it's time to go and forge my own life and not have to depend on others. I will be going for a major in accounting and a minor in law; I will make a life for myself. My kids will NOT grow up in the same poverty I did; having to choose between clothes and food, having to wonder if I was gonna have electricity when I got home from school....
....anyways, enough about that. Mom's gotten steadily worse since I made my decision; she gets extremely mean and defensive anytime I talk to her, but I really have to say, I understand how she feels. I mean, with the damage from the brain tumor, she just doesn't understand. She can't see into next week or next month; all she knows that I'm leaving. So, the only logical conclusion is that I'm never coming back, and that my leaving isn't to better myself but must be because she did something wrong. And my mom also doesn't have the cognitive faculties to face when she's done something wrong, so she becomes mean and bitter and blames everyone else.
Like I said, I understand how she feels, but....the comments she makes hurt, like, "I can't wait for tomorrow to come and go so you're out of my life and I never have to see you again! Without you I can actually have a life!" Yeah, I know it's her way of coping, but....meh, don't wanna bore you guys :)
So all in all, I'm being hectically shoved around and chaotically rushing to get things done; being cried on and crying with Veronica; and having to face saying goodbye to a lot of people who, because they're not family or close friends, I probably won't see again for a long time. My boss, Mrs. Alleman, almost cried when I came in to get my last paycheck....she pulled me into a tight hug and didn't say much. One of my coworkers, a lady named Diane, hugged me two or three times and said she knew I was gonna make her proud.
I am taking my computer, but I imagine it may be a day or two before I get it set up and internet-accessible (MVNU provides free internet for it's students in their rooms). So until then, may the Force be with you and God bless you; until next time this is Talon Sky, your friendly neighborhood Shadow-Jedi Samurai ^_-
First and foremost, yes, Veronica and I are still together and happier then ever. In fact, we're engaged and the wedding date is, thusfar, June 27th of next summer.
I got a letter a little under a week ago that made one of my life's dreams absolutely possible: not only am I accepted at my dream college, Mount Vernon Nazarene University, but the government is willing to pay the entire $25,040 a year tuition!! Yes, this is putting a tremendous amount of stress on me....been running my ass off non-stop since I got the letter, preparing for the big move down there tomorrow. I still haven't packed....procrastinators, unite tomorrow!....but I'll work on that tonight. I have to launder my clothes and pack them as soon as they're dry, probably being on the computer for one last time or getting in a bit of God of War II. I'll pack up my TV and computer tomorrow morning, as they shouldn't be too hard to pack, and go see Veronica one last time before heading off to my biggest adventure yet.
Ver's taking this hard, I know she is. The past few days have been literally tear-soaked; I love her with all my heart, but I simply cannot throw this away. That, and I made a promise to myself years and years ago....when I visited my sister at Mount Vernon....that this was my college. I fell in love with it, and promised myself that if I could ever attend, I would. Of course, the tuition cost was what kept those dreams just that....dreams. I knew I'd never, ever, afford it. But now that it's a reality....it's time to go and forge my own life and not have to depend on others. I will be going for a major in accounting and a minor in law; I will make a life for myself. My kids will NOT grow up in the same poverty I did; having to choose between clothes and food, having to wonder if I was gonna have electricity when I got home from school....
....anyways, enough about that. Mom's gotten steadily worse since I made my decision; she gets extremely mean and defensive anytime I talk to her, but I really have to say, I understand how she feels. I mean, with the damage from the brain tumor, she just doesn't understand. She can't see into next week or next month; all she knows that I'm leaving. So, the only logical conclusion is that I'm never coming back, and that my leaving isn't to better myself but must be because she did something wrong. And my mom also doesn't have the cognitive faculties to face when she's done something wrong, so she becomes mean and bitter and blames everyone else.
Like I said, I understand how she feels, but....the comments she makes hurt, like, "I can't wait for tomorrow to come and go so you're out of my life and I never have to see you again! Without you I can actually have a life!" Yeah, I know it's her way of coping, but....meh, don't wanna bore you guys :)
So all in all, I'm being hectically shoved around and chaotically rushing to get things done; being cried on and crying with Veronica; and having to face saying goodbye to a lot of people who, because they're not family or close friends, I probably won't see again for a long time. My boss, Mrs. Alleman, almost cried when I came in to get my last paycheck....she pulled me into a tight hug and didn't say much. One of my coworkers, a lady named Diane, hugged me two or three times and said she knew I was gonna make her proud.
I am taking my computer, but I imagine it may be a day or two before I get it set up and internet-accessible (MVNU provides free internet for it's students in their rooms). So until then, may the Force be with you and God bless you; until next time this is Talon Sky, your friendly neighborhood Shadow-Jedi Samurai ^_-