confusion
i am in an extreme state of confusion. i feel like my life is moving and i am merely a spectator. i dont feel apart of anything. i dont feel anything. i feel detached but careless. i dream about how i want things to be but they are impossible for me to put into action, but they arent really how i want things to be they are how i need things to be. i feel like i need so much right now, but for me to get it would be impossible. this is crazy, stressful, and depressing.
i also find it funny(or sad) how one can feel they know something, but not really know it at all. and they can try to understand it and even believe they do, but they dont. and when they discover that they dont, theyve realized that they have lied to themselves. and even upon realization and sympathy they still do not know.