Rape Culture
I have seen quite a bit recently that has shown me rape culture is alive and well, so I thought we could have a little refresher course in it. I know some are rolling their eyes right about now but please keep reading. 1 in 6 women will be sexually assaulted in her lifetime and 1 in 33 men. That means we all know someone who has been sexually assaulted. The perpetrator is the inappropriate guy at work, our quiet neighbour, our friend, the good guy who would never hurt someone. In a culture that makes excuses and diminishes the power of rape they all do, and for the most part they get away with it.
I’m not expecting a lot of comments on this, I just hope that some will read it and stop to think. This is the only way to fight the problem.
In January a Toronto police officer giving a talk to university students about rape, informed them that “women should avoid dressing like sluts in order not to be victimized”. This sparked outrage here and led to the formation of SlutWalk, where all women were invited to march in protest, to show that we can and should be able to wear whatever we want without inviting rape. 3000 people showed up, some in short skirts, low cut tops and lingerie. Since then SlutWalks have spread all over the world.
Lest you think that it was just an off-hand remark, one that has no meaning in the judicial system, in February a Manitoba judge gave a rapist a 2 year conditional sentence citing, among other charming sentiments such as the rapist was really a “clumsy Don Juan”, the fact that the woman was wearing makeup and no bra.
The idea that a woman is at fault in any way for her rape is a prevalent one in society. The only person at fault is the rapist. Yet woman are all too often blamed, for what she was wearing, for her choices and for failing to take enough precautions to prevent herself from being raped. This is rape culture.
As was discussed here, the British justice secretary took to BBC Radio to discuss his plan to halve sentencing for rapists who plead guilty. While there he took pains to point out that ‘serious rapes’ perpetrated with violence by the stranger in the bushes will not be reduced, only lesser rapes such as date rape.
We need to get away from this idea that only rapes committed by maniacs with knives in dark alleys are ‘rape-rapes’. All rape is rape. All rape is devastating to the victim. The majority of rapes are committed by someone known to the victim, even casually. To diminish what these people went through is repulsive, yet it happens far too often. This is rape culture.
The French media have responded to the Strauss-Kahn arrest by turning him into the victim. Several papers have released the accuser’s name, they have given interviews to those that defend him as ‘a benign seducer’ and made light of the situation through jokes.
When we make excuses for the perpetrator, when we joke about the matter, when we find anything slightly unsavoury about the victim and use it to malign their character, this is rape culture.
We are inundated with sexual violence scenes in movies, televisions and books. This is rape culture. When rape is used as a weapon in war, this is rape culture. When we expect victims to keep silent about their rapes out of shame, this is rape culture. When we equate rape with a man walking around a bad part of town with valuables hanging out of his pocket, this is rape culture. When we blur the lines on the definition of rape around diminished capacity to consent and coercion, this is rape culture. When we make rape jokes, this is rape culture. When we use the word rape as an analogy to anything other than the act itself this is rape culture.
1 in 6 women and 1 in 33 men. This is an epidemic, one that is being allowed to continue out of disregard for the victims.
We all contribute to rape culture every day, in ways we are not even aware of. It’s time we stop making excuses for this behavior, time to put a stop to a society where all these things are acceptable. We need to speak out when we see it. We need to teach our children to stand up to this type of thinking, so that we can leave them a better society than ours.
In closing I am sharing a beautifully written blog called Schrödinger’s Rapist. A lot of you have probably already read it, it’s been around for a while. If you haven’t, please do. If even some men took the lessons shown to heart it will have a tremendous impact on women’s feeling of safety in our day to day lives.
ETA: Since the 1 in 60 men as rapists claim was causing so much contention I have removed it from the post. It is a statistic I have seen many places before but I will admit I did not do any research into finding a study that will back that up. I apologize for that.
I’m not expecting a lot of comments on this, I just hope that some will read it and stop to think. This is the only way to fight the problem.
In January a Toronto police officer giving a talk to university students about rape, informed them that “women should avoid dressing like sluts in order not to be victimized”. This sparked outrage here and led to the formation of SlutWalk, where all women were invited to march in protest, to show that we can and should be able to wear whatever we want without inviting rape. 3000 people showed up, some in short skirts, low cut tops and lingerie. Since then SlutWalks have spread all over the world.
Lest you think that it was just an off-hand remark, one that has no meaning in the judicial system, in February a Manitoba judge gave a rapist a 2 year conditional sentence citing, among other charming sentiments such as the rapist was really a “clumsy Don Juan”, the fact that the woman was wearing makeup and no bra.
The idea that a woman is at fault in any way for her rape is a prevalent one in society. The only person at fault is the rapist. Yet woman are all too often blamed, for what she was wearing, for her choices and for failing to take enough precautions to prevent herself from being raped. This is rape culture.
As was discussed here, the British justice secretary took to BBC Radio to discuss his plan to halve sentencing for rapists who plead guilty. While there he took pains to point out that ‘serious rapes’ perpetrated with violence by the stranger in the bushes will not be reduced, only lesser rapes such as date rape.
We need to get away from this idea that only rapes committed by maniacs with knives in dark alleys are ‘rape-rapes’. All rape is rape. All rape is devastating to the victim. The majority of rapes are committed by someone known to the victim, even casually. To diminish what these people went through is repulsive, yet it happens far too often. This is rape culture.
The French media have responded to the Strauss-Kahn arrest by turning him into the victim. Several papers have released the accuser’s name, they have given interviews to those that defend him as ‘a benign seducer’ and made light of the situation through jokes.
When we make excuses for the perpetrator, when we joke about the matter, when we find anything slightly unsavoury about the victim and use it to malign their character, this is rape culture.
We are inundated with sexual violence scenes in movies, televisions and books. This is rape culture. When rape is used as a weapon in war, this is rape culture. When we expect victims to keep silent about their rapes out of shame, this is rape culture. When we equate rape with a man walking around a bad part of town with valuables hanging out of his pocket, this is rape culture. When we blur the lines on the definition of rape around diminished capacity to consent and coercion, this is rape culture. When we make rape jokes, this is rape culture. When we use the word rape as an analogy to anything other than the act itself this is rape culture.
1 in 6 women and 1 in 33 men. This is an epidemic, one that is being allowed to continue out of disregard for the victims.
We all contribute to rape culture every day, in ways we are not even aware of. It’s time we stop making excuses for this behavior, time to put a stop to a society where all these things are acceptable. We need to speak out when we see it. We need to teach our children to stand up to this type of thinking, so that we can leave them a better society than ours.
In closing I am sharing a beautifully written blog called Schrödinger’s Rapist. A lot of you have probably already read it, it’s been around for a while. If you haven’t, please do. If even some men took the lessons shown to heart it will have a tremendous impact on women’s feeling of safety in our day to day lives.
ETA: Since the 1 in 60 men as rapists claim was causing so much contention I have removed it from the post. It is a statistic I have seen many places before but I will admit I did not do any research into finding a study that will back that up. I apologize for that.