Post study abroad email from my godmother
I want you to tell me everything about your experiences in Japan. Since you arrived, your friends and how the culture influenced you. Why didn't you get married to a Japanese guy? I want you to get married already. Remember that you have a huge heart!
and let's stop right there because that's the end of the WTF-ness...
Really godmother? I know I don't fit in as a 'regular' American because of some of my mixed Mexican/American and now Japanese mannerisms and beliefs as well...I already think I'm a failure at almost 22 21 for not only NOT being married yet, but for NOT being in a relationship, and for me, at 21, to not even have had a serious relationship at all to date.
I get it.
While all my cousins my age are off married and with kids already, and all their friends are off married and or at least have the prospect of possibly getting married soon, and people from my high school with the same Mexican background all doing the same, I'm the odd man out. I get it.
The pressure sucks and has been slowly building up since I turned 18. I know Mexicans and Mexican Americans usually get a quick start on marriage and settling down compared to most other Americans, I know this and it doesn't help my fail of self-esteem I've only recently been building up.
6 months abroad was not and was not going to be enough time to find someone, fall in love, have them fall in love with me, date and get to know each other, build a relationship, think of getting married, have the wedding and settle down. No way. I mean, can't say I didn't try with my crushes. Before, I'd never say anything to them and sure, I jumped the gun these couple of times and probably ruined any chance due to my timing but with me leaving, well, it was all doomed to begin with ne.
*sigh* I shouldn't let it, but this email really got to me =/
and let's stop right there because that's the end of the WTF-ness...
Really godmother? I know I don't fit in as a 'regular' American because of some of my mixed Mexican/American and now Japanese mannerisms and beliefs as well...I already think I'm a failure at almost 22 21 for not only NOT being married yet, but for NOT being in a relationship, and for me, at 21, to not even have had a serious relationship at all to date.
I get it.
While all my cousins my age are off married and with kids already, and all their friends are off married and or at least have the prospect of possibly getting married soon, and people from my high school with the same Mexican background all doing the same, I'm the odd man out. I get it.
The pressure sucks and has been slowly building up since I turned 18. I know Mexicans and Mexican Americans usually get a quick start on marriage and settling down compared to most other Americans, I know this and it doesn't help my fail of self-esteem I've only recently been building up.
6 months abroad was not and was not going to be enough time to find someone, fall in love, have them fall in love with me, date and get to know each other, build a relationship, think of getting married, have the wedding and settle down. No way. I mean, can't say I didn't try with my crushes. Before, I'd never say anything to them and sure, I jumped the gun these couple of times and probably ruined any chance due to my timing but with me leaving, well, it was all doomed to begin with ne.
*sigh* I shouldn't let it, but this email really got to me =/