I Know You... The Gleam In Your Eye Is So Familiar A Gleam....
Oddly enough, I'm not even sure where to start or what to say... I seem to be out of practice of updating. Though, I've begun to wonder if I'm worried about what people will read about me and how it will reflect who I am in years to come. Oh the joys of being a library science major :) It is something to think about though.... what sort of legacy and trail you're leaving behind? I probably think about it too much and let it keep me from really expressing myself. So, I'm going to try with this post and see what happens...
Life right now... pretty darn good. I know I've said that before, but I don't know that I've ever meant it as much as I do right now. My biggest worry right now is money, but for some reason even though I'm super worried about it, I know it will work out. And because I know that, I can discuss the good stuff :)
I think the biggest reason my life seems to be getting on track is because I've been going back to church. I have a long way to go, but I know I'll get there. I'm not even sure where that is exactly, or what it is, but I have faith that I'll get there. And I think that's what has been missing the last few years... my faith. I've never doubted God's existence by any means, but I think I just .... I don't know. I lost something, but I've found it again. I look forward to going to church and it feels good to feel like I belong there again - I'd missed that more than I thought.
*deep breath* I'd have to say that a certain person has played a big role in my life feeling really good again. I think the last time I posted about it, we were still up in the air about things. Since then, we're officially dating and are doing the long distance thing. (haha, I just went and checked my old entries... exactly one month after I posted that, we started dating... funny how things work out.) Anyways... this guy... not like any other guy I've been interested in. Every time we talk, even now, he will say or do something that blows me away, but in the good sense. He is the sort of guy I was supposed to look for to settle down with, which I find a bit scary. I like that he is that way, even if that's not where we end up, because it's shown me what I deserve and how I deserve to be treated - sometimes to the point I can't handle it. I have to say that after Luke, I did become somewhat cynical and didn't really believe I'd be able to find someone else who is such a good friend and in so many ways, just like me, but then in so many ways, not at all like me. He's just amazing. What's scary is I'm sure that I'm falling for him, and that makes me vulnerable. Like I told him, it's scary, crazy and exciting all at the same time. I don't even know what to say after that. lol. He makes me happy - happier than I thought was possible when being in a relationship, however new of a relationship it might be. I don't know... well, I do know I want things to work out. I just hope he knows how great I think he is. This long distance thing is hard, but I have a good feeling that it will be worth it, no matter what happens :)
What else... there's just so much to say. Like I said before, life is just good. I have an incredible group of friends - I don't know where I'd be without them. They hold me accountable and expect me to be the person they know I'm capable of being and I love them for it. (The boy also does this, which is another reason I like him.) Maybe I've realized just how lucky I am and am just trying to take it all in while I can...
I went and saw Night at the Museum: Battle at the Smithsonian today - so good. I love history and museums. All I could think while watching it was how I would love to be able to go into the Smithsonian underground floors and just look and take in what's down there... and wishing that at night museums really did come to life. lol. Corny I know, but seriously, how cool would that be?? I'd love it, that's for sure. I am worried about getting enough experience in my field before going job hunting, but I know that it will work out the way God wants it to, and so I just need to make myself available to whatever that may be. We shall see :)
I like having possibilities....
Life right now... pretty darn good. I know I've said that before, but I don't know that I've ever meant it as much as I do right now. My biggest worry right now is money, but for some reason even though I'm super worried about it, I know it will work out. And because I know that, I can discuss the good stuff :)
I think the biggest reason my life seems to be getting on track is because I've been going back to church. I have a long way to go, but I know I'll get there. I'm not even sure where that is exactly, or what it is, but I have faith that I'll get there. And I think that's what has been missing the last few years... my faith. I've never doubted God's existence by any means, but I think I just .... I don't know. I lost something, but I've found it again. I look forward to going to church and it feels good to feel like I belong there again - I'd missed that more than I thought.
*deep breath* I'd have to say that a certain person has played a big role in my life feeling really good again. I think the last time I posted about it, we were still up in the air about things. Since then, we're officially dating and are doing the long distance thing. (haha, I just went and checked my old entries... exactly one month after I posted that, we started dating... funny how things work out.) Anyways... this guy... not like any other guy I've been interested in. Every time we talk, even now, he will say or do something that blows me away, but in the good sense. He is the sort of guy I was supposed to look for to settle down with, which I find a bit scary. I like that he is that way, even if that's not where we end up, because it's shown me what I deserve and how I deserve to be treated - sometimes to the point I can't handle it. I have to say that after Luke, I did become somewhat cynical and didn't really believe I'd be able to find someone else who is such a good friend and in so many ways, just like me, but then in so many ways, not at all like me. He's just amazing. What's scary is I'm sure that I'm falling for him, and that makes me vulnerable. Like I told him, it's scary, crazy and exciting all at the same time. I don't even know what to say after that. lol. He makes me happy - happier than I thought was possible when being in a relationship, however new of a relationship it might be. I don't know... well, I do know I want things to work out. I just hope he knows how great I think he is. This long distance thing is hard, but I have a good feeling that it will be worth it, no matter what happens :)
What else... there's just so much to say. Like I said before, life is just good. I have an incredible group of friends - I don't know where I'd be without them. They hold me accountable and expect me to be the person they know I'm capable of being and I love them for it. (The boy also does this, which is another reason I like him.) Maybe I've realized just how lucky I am and am just trying to take it all in while I can...
I went and saw Night at the Museum: Battle at the Smithsonian today - so good. I love history and museums. All I could think while watching it was how I would love to be able to go into the Smithsonian underground floors and just look and take in what's down there... and wishing that at night museums really did come to life. lol. Corny I know, but seriously, how cool would that be?? I'd love it, that's for sure. I am worried about getting enough experience in my field before going job hunting, but I know that it will work out the way God wants it to, and so I just need to make myself available to whatever that may be. We shall see :)
I like having possibilities....