????
ever have those times when it feels like things couldn't be better...little things in the back of your head that keep you wondering aren't there anymore, you're in love with everyone around you and that one thing that keeps you up at night sometimes is yours...
...then the worst thing ever happens; you wake up
i feel stupid for writing it this thing at 6:30AM where i easily could be sleeping in. but i just had one of those dreams and obv. woke up from it...too bad huh. so for the past hour i found myself staring at my ceiling as if it was going to unfold some big secret...it didn't.
veronica is upstairs still sleeping; she spent the night last night and we talked about a lot of things like faith and God...it was really nice. I had a pretty good time last night...some of us just got together to hang out and watch movies.
last night i figured out what bad timing my conscious has on me. i hate those times when you think ur doing the right thing and then BAM...10 min after its like "what the heck was i thinking, i know better than that" ...i can't use that as an excuse anymore though because it's happened too many times; i should def know better now. i guess its one of those things where you know you shouldn't do it but you start thinking through your heart and think "maybe things will be different this time."...man your heart gets you in alota trouble sometimes.
now im just stuck w/ a very abused relationship w/ someone....a relationship that should have never been abused in the first place. i dunno, i guess i just wish we could be friends again...no not "friends"...real friends...ya know, the kind that actually talk to eachother on a regular basis and listen for the responce when asked the question "how are you?"....but you can't always get what you want.
don't think im all hurt and upset because thats not why im writing this at all...actually, i don't know why im writing this, i guess i just had some things to say...sorry its so long.
...then the worst thing ever happens; you wake up
i feel stupid for writing it this thing at 6:30AM where i easily could be sleeping in. but i just had one of those dreams and obv. woke up from it...too bad huh. so for the past hour i found myself staring at my ceiling as if it was going to unfold some big secret...it didn't.
veronica is upstairs still sleeping; she spent the night last night and we talked about a lot of things like faith and God...it was really nice. I had a pretty good time last night...some of us just got together to hang out and watch movies.
last night i figured out what bad timing my conscious has on me. i hate those times when you think ur doing the right thing and then BAM...10 min after its like "what the heck was i thinking, i know better than that" ...i can't use that as an excuse anymore though because it's happened too many times; i should def know better now. i guess its one of those things where you know you shouldn't do it but you start thinking through your heart and think "maybe things will be different this time."...man your heart gets you in alota trouble sometimes.
now im just stuck w/ a very abused relationship w/ someone....a relationship that should have never been abused in the first place. i dunno, i guess i just wish we could be friends again...no not "friends"...real friends...ya know, the kind that actually talk to eachother on a regular basis and listen for the responce when asked the question "how are you?"....but you can't always get what you want.
don't think im all hurt and upset because thats not why im writing this at all...actually, i don't know why im writing this, i guess i just had some things to say...sorry its so long.