#MWFF12
MWFF was my first convention ever in 2007. It seems so long ago. I roomed with and . Every interaction didn't seem real (you know, more like the "friendship" you form with people on airplanes...single serving friends) as I had yet to form any real connections with anyone. I still felt like an outsider to some strange subculture I knew I was interested in but didn't understand....I had no clue that all of that would change.
Six years later I am at this same convention. I am surrounded by people whom approach me and give me hugs, support me through some of the toughest times of my life, and I consider practically family. I am also suddenly wearing a staff badge, man handling a radio, and making every moment with people I ran into count because I want them to see how important they are to me.
I will admit, I arrived on Thursday feeling very out of touch. I have been in Kansas since I left Chicago in Feb. I was "volunteered" to be the fursuit programming director, but even as official con staff, I was not sure if I had fleeting thoughts wondering if I still belonged there (for a very brief few moments).
My life had changed and moved forward, just like everyone else...I was hundreds of miles from the social gatherings I had grown so comfortable with having on a weekly basis. I was not at a zoo anymore, I was at a church (and the YMCA)...I am not working with animals I am helping underprivileged people, teaching people about the love and compassion about Jesus and trying to walk a life worth living completely on my own. "On my own" meant away from furry, away from the friends I loved, and away from my own family. Life is very different in Wichita then Chicago and Columbus.
I wondered if I would still be welcomed at the con, if my old friends would still want to hang out with me...as crazy as it sounds NOW, these thoughts DID go through my head.
Yet, the moment I walked into the lobby and heard TITS! and was semi-tackled by a person in an animal costume, which was followed by conversation that was like I had just seen them yesterday....I realized my thought process was incredibly wrong. I was welcomed and wanted there, with these crazy friends (who happen to dress up as giant animals), no matter where my life journey was. These crazy FURends are my family and always will be.
...and this MWFF was the best one to date. I think because of the realization of all of this along with my new found place amongst the con staff as the fursuit programming lead. I LOVED it. The responsibility was something I actually really enjoyed. I was able to make an impact on a huge event and help things run smoothly. I would pop into panels, make sure things were where they were supposed to be, and try to fix any quirky weird issues that just happens when you do any large event. It reminded me of my days back with Mascot Org- handling huge events with dozens of performers, balancing client and performer happiness, and trying to make it look like everything was smooth as silk hen in reality you wanted to crawl into a corner in the fetal position and cry.
I got a ton of thank yous and compliments I did not expect nor feel I deserved, because in my mind I was "just doing my job". BUT- it was awesome and had a huge effect on me to have people tell me, from the conchair, the programming lead, to various staff, to being mentioned at closing ceremonies...how good of a job I was doing. It made me feel warm and fuzzy (har har) and wanted.
So with all of that being said, I saw a lot of people and spent to little time with all of them....but I was thankful for what time I did have. To the staff and volunteers at the convention, you all did an amazing job, I am thankful and blessed to have had the chance to work alongside you...and drink with you.
I love you all so much. You are my family- because friends are the family you choose. :) I can not wait to see you all again. <3
Six years later I am at this same convention. I am surrounded by people whom approach me and give me hugs, support me through some of the toughest times of my life, and I consider practically family. I am also suddenly wearing a staff badge, man handling a radio, and making every moment with people I ran into count because I want them to see how important they are to me.
I will admit, I arrived on Thursday feeling very out of touch. I have been in Kansas since I left Chicago in Feb. I was "volunteered" to be the fursuit programming director, but even as official con staff, I was not sure if I had fleeting thoughts wondering if I still belonged there (for a very brief few moments).
My life had changed and moved forward, just like everyone else...I was hundreds of miles from the social gatherings I had grown so comfortable with having on a weekly basis. I was not at a zoo anymore, I was at a church (and the YMCA)...I am not working with animals I am helping underprivileged people, teaching people about the love and compassion about Jesus and trying to walk a life worth living completely on my own. "On my own" meant away from furry, away from the friends I loved, and away from my own family. Life is very different in Wichita then Chicago and Columbus.
I wondered if I would still be welcomed at the con, if my old friends would still want to hang out with me...as crazy as it sounds NOW, these thoughts DID go through my head.
Yet, the moment I walked into the lobby and heard TITS! and was semi-tackled by a person in an animal costume, which was followed by conversation that was like I had just seen them yesterday....I realized my thought process was incredibly wrong. I was welcomed and wanted there, with these crazy friends (who happen to dress up as giant animals), no matter where my life journey was. These crazy FURends are my family and always will be.
...and this MWFF was the best one to date. I think because of the realization of all of this along with my new found place amongst the con staff as the fursuit programming lead. I LOVED it. The responsibility was something I actually really enjoyed. I was able to make an impact on a huge event and help things run smoothly. I would pop into panels, make sure things were where they were supposed to be, and try to fix any quirky weird issues that just happens when you do any large event. It reminded me of my days back with Mascot Org- handling huge events with dozens of performers, balancing client and performer happiness, and trying to make it look like everything was smooth as silk hen in reality you wanted to crawl into a corner in the fetal position and cry.
I got a ton of thank yous and compliments I did not expect nor feel I deserved, because in my mind I was "just doing my job". BUT- it was awesome and had a huge effect on me to have people tell me, from the conchair, the programming lead, to various staff, to being mentioned at closing ceremonies...how good of a job I was doing. It made me feel warm and fuzzy (har har) and wanted.
So with all of that being said, I saw a lot of people and spent to little time with all of them....but I was thankful for what time I did have. To the staff and volunteers at the convention, you all did an amazing job, I am thankful and blessed to have had the chance to work alongside you...and drink with you.
I love you all so much. You are my family- because friends are the family you choose. :) I can not wait to see you all again. <3