Toy Story 3 Win/Fail (Cut for Spoilers)
Alright.
I loved 98% of Toy Story 3.
I HATED the last 10 minutes with a blinding passion I will explain.
I openly admit that a majority of this film is a wonderful return to the Toy Story world. Within the run time, we meet new friends like Trixie, Ken, and an adorable hedgehog named “Mr. Pricklepants”...also possibly the coolest mutant/bug/superhero figure ever seen in a children’s film, Twitch. Also, Totoro makes a very random, but welcome appearance, even if I don’t believe Bonnie would own one. Totoros that size cost an arm and a leg...and possibly a first born. I did notice that Bonnie doesn’t have any siblings around. Hmmmmm.
Ken and Barbie are pure, unadulterated OTP in this and I love every second of it. Ken is completely in love with clothes, gambles on a See ‘N Say, has swirly handwriting, and takes offense to being called an “accessory.” He and Barbie complete each other’s sentences and have an absurd number of cute moments together. Even after Ken is revealed to be a henchman for the film’s villain, he still has a soft spot for Barbie and, after some tough love, he comes around and takes the good guy side. You Go, Well Groomed Man who signs letters with swirly handwriting and glittery star stickers. I adored the line where Lotso berates Ken for having a soft side and how he shouldn’t expect anything else from a “girl’s toy” and that there are a hundred million Barbie dolls just like Barbie, but Ken says...ready for it?...”Not to me.” D’awwww. OTP, pure and simple. Plus, Ken’s fashion show was pure win. I love the sequin tuxedo. Nyoron. :3
Lots-O-Huggin’ Bear is probably Pixar’s most tragic, yet truly evil villain. If you take a whooping dollop of Muntz’s insanity, a pinch Randal’s jealousy, a serving of Hopper’s maniacal lust for power, and add a few heartstring tugs, you’ve got Lotso. Lotso is probably Pixar’s most disturbing villain thus far and I feel very mislead by a marketing campaign that painted him as some kind of super cute pink cuddlefest. What evil smells of strawberries? The most insidious kind. Lotso has the rest of the toys at Sunnyside Daycare rigged up in a bizarre mix of prison meets Lord of the Flies. Why does he create a pyramid of vicious hierarchy and put himself on the top? Because he was replaced. Left behind on a trip with a baby doll and clown toy, Lotso led the other toys back to their owner, a little girl named Daisy. The whole thing plays out like a large “What If?” story. Lotso, in the flashbacks, seems to be as dedicated to Daisy as Woody is to Andy, which creates a nice parallel to the story. However, unlike when Woody and Buzz return home, Daisy has replaced Lotso...with another Lotso. Oh, the irony and tragedy. While Daisy is one of a kind, Lotso isn’t. They made millions of him and Daisy’s parents bought her a new one. This shatters the bear and he lies to his companions and says that Daisy replaced all of them. The clown knows that Lotso is lying, but he is overruled. In addition to being insane at this point, Lotso is also really large and intimidating by scale. It is like Leader Class Megatron decided to pound on Deluxe Class Sentinel Prime. There’s not much the latter could do. Eventually, the three stumble onto Sunnyside Daycare and Lotso, driven mad with abandonment, makes himself the self-proclaimed leader of the toys and declares himself “master of his own destiny.” Lotso is cruel, selfish, vengeful, and bitter....and he is featured every day in the Block Party Bash at Disney’s Hollywood Studios. Line up to hug the evil bear, kiddies.
The movie follows the usual Toy Story formula of toys losing Andy, Toys wanting to get back to Andy, Toys meeting new toys, and a big villain reveal at the not so very end. However, Toy Story 3 pits Woody against his peers.
Time has passed since the original movie and the only remaining toys in Andy’s room are Woody, Buzz, Jessie, Bullseye, Ham, The Potatoheads, Slinky Dog, Rex, and the three aliens from Pizza Planet. Andy wants to take Woody to college and keep the rest of his toys in the attic. However, Andy’s Mom mistakes the bag as a garbage bag and puts them out on the curb. Since the other toys didn’t see what happened (They were in the bag, after all), they are angry that Andy has decided to throw them away. Woody tries to explain the situation, but the other toys decide to go to Sunnyside Daycare in a donation box. Woody goes along to try to talk them out of it. Of course, he loses to Lotso, who is posing as a kind, grandfatherly bear and the cowboy leaves after telling the toys how selfish they are. They belong to Andy, but are only thinking of themselves by running away. Of course, the toys eventually learn the error of their ways and Woody mounts a rescue mission that culminates in one of the most thrilling, emotional moments in Pixar history where the toys all face certain doom bravely and all holding each others hands as Lotso taunts “Where’s your kid now?” before running away and leaving them for dead.
Of course, they toys escape and make it back to Andy’s in a really cute way.
So...after all that, I am completely in love with the movie...until a tacked on ending decides to show up. It is an ending that seems to put a nail in the proverbial coffin of the Toy Story franchise.
Seriously, the ending is heinous. It contradicts the first ninety-eight percent of the movie.
Woody writes a note (signed “Andy’s Mom” or something) that asks Andy to donate the toys to a little girl down the street.
Wait? What?
They spent the whole movie trying to get back to Andy, and then they have him give them away? AND HE ACTUALLY DOES IT?
He must not love them at all!
The Toys must not love Andy at all!
As long as they’re getting played with, they no longer seem to care, which is awful.
The ending completely contradicts...THE ENTIRE TOY STORY FRANCHISE and even itself. Earlier in the movie, Woody calls the other Toys selfish for wanting to play with by children who aren’t Andy...only to suggest that Andy give them to another child, including himself.
The mind boggles and logic fails at this point.
I can’t believe Andy gives up Woody. That would be like me giving up my Mutant Kevin 11 figure, my Voyager Blitzwing AND my Electronic Talking Boba Fett. That just isn’t happening, my friends. After watching the movie, I felt compelled to go home, look at my bookshelf and mentally promise its residents that I WOULD NEVER GIVE THEM AWAY.
What kind of garbage ending is that? They’re no longer Andy’s toys...now they are Bonnie’s toys and they seem honky dory with that.
Oh, yes, I cried at the end...but not for the reason I should have.
At the very end, I realized, IRONY, Lotso is the most love based character in the movie because he loved Daisy so much that the loss of her love made him go insane and deny the love of all children.
The ending felt rushed(seriously, it doesn’t even stylistically match the rest of the movie), tacked on, and I couldn’t help but feel it had some kind of forced message about how we shouldn’t have attachments to material possessions we don’t need/someone else would use more. The ending, unlike the rest of the movie, doesn’t feel like a Pixar ending at all. It feels like something some executive who never cared about toys in their life would stick in and think was “a really great idea.” I bet it was the same person who thought putting Lotso in a parade for small children was another “great idea.” Don’t the kiddies want to see the sociopathic pink bear? Don’t they want to forsake their transitional objects? After all, they’re only TOYS and TOYS just want to be played with...right? WRONG. In the Toy Story universe, Toys love their Kids. This is established in both Toy Story and Toy Story 2. It is spit upon in the final five minutes of Toy Story 3.
Get your own transitional objects, douchebag. These belong to ME!
I am NOT buying this movie on DVD. I’m not even buying MERCHANDISE from this movie, and there is a lot of cute stuff from this move out there. No amount of adorable Ken and Barbie moments can possible compensate for the gawd awful ending that is shoved down our throats by an unseen higher up suit!
This is the first, and hopefully only FAIL ending a Pixar movie will ever have. The first 98% of the movie is pure Pixar. The last 2% is pure rubbish.