RP LOG with doesntwaltz, a68whiskey & livesonlipgloss

[tacticalmind]

[Follows THIS]

Rob couldn't decide whether things were awkward or not. It felt like it should be awkward, and he knew it wasn't exactly an ideal situation, but it wasn't actually unpleasant. He did suspect Mike agreed to come to dinner because he felt guilty about what happened to Rob. Not that it was his fault, but when you're a soldier and a friend gets injured like this, there is a sense of guilt and responsibility to do what you can to help them. There was definitely a distinct hesitation and wariness once Rob revealed that Leila had invited Rachel to the dinner, too. In fact, Rob really thought Mike would pull out, but again, he must have had some sort of sense of obligation.


This was the first time Rob had met Rachel, and she seemed really nice. Leila seemed happy to chat casually with her, while Mike mostly just sat there initially with very little to say. Now they were sitting around the small dining table for four together, and because they didn't get the keys to their new home until next week, they were sitting cosily together with the table small enough that their elbows were touching. Also, with Rob still awkward with his crutches and needing room to move so he didn't start getting achy, Rachel and Mike were actually a lot closer on the other side of the table than they would normally be. And they had only all just sat down for the first course, so it was going to be an interesting evening. Rob cleared his throat and pushed his soup around in the bowl without really taking much. He fucking wanted this dinner to work so Mike might at least connect with Rachel again, but his appetite was wavering. It wouldn't take a heard of dinosaurs to get him to move off that chair, though. Not until Mike remembered he had a voice. "This is nice," he said with a bright smile.

Leila liked Rachel. She knew she was in the fashion industry, something to do with make-up, but Rachel wasn't stuck up. She reminded her of Harri a little bit, only tinier, and a lot more cheerful and animated. Until her eyes landed on Mike, and Rachel became all too aware that Mike wasn't saying a single word. That she might as well be sitting next to a brick wall. She reached out to run her fingers through Rob's hair that was starting to grow out, giving him a small encouraging smile. "Don't make me start feeding you. I don't think Mike and Rachel want that kind of a floor show. But I'll do it if it makes you eat," she told him as she picked up her own spoon, holding his gaze.

Rachel glanced away as she laughed, before watching them the two again. "I have no doubt that Rob would enjoy it, but you're right. I really don't need that particular floorshow." She moved her legs under the table, uncrossing them as she made herself more comfortable. Her left one came in contact with Mike's leg, and she froze as a bolt of heat shot through her body. She swallowed hard as she turned her head briefly to see if he would react. She just wanted him to give her something. Anything. Even a look of disgust so she knew he wasn't just ignoring her. Rachel had been surprised by the dinner invite, but accepted because she wanted to get to know Leila better. And because she had been hoping Mike would be around.

Only as soon as she'd set foot in the apartment, she'd wanted to ground to open up and swallow her. She looked down at her dress, and tried to tug the sides up so her cleavage wasn't showing so much before picking up her own spoon and taking a small mouthful. "Mm... this is really good. And thanks again for the invite. I really appreciate it."

Mike had been intent on his soup until Leila drew attention to the fact Rob wasn't eating. He looked up, watching the way Rob was making a good effort to appear involved in the meal, but his glass of water seemed to have his attention the most. "Yeah, dude, ya' should eat. Need to be keepin' ya' strength up to heal and now ya' ain't got a spleen, bugs and shit will want to jump on ya' where they can. It's important ya' look after yourself. There ain't hardly nothin' of ya' as it is, ya' skinny bastard," he joked with a small smirk. He didn't miss when Rachel's leg touched his and he glanced at her, clearing his throat. "And yeah, nice. Cookin' just like back home," he remembered to add. Good, homecooked food was definitely right up there with sex of things to miss when shipped out.

Rob looked at his soup almost like Mike had just told him he should tip it over his head, but continued to just play with it. It wasn't the injuries, it was the pain medication. The doctors did warn it could fuck with his appetite. When it was just Leila and him, they usually just had lots of smaller meals throughout the day, so this was the first big dinner they really faced since he got out of hospital. It was nice, Rob missed sitting down to a meal and hoped they could do it more in their new home. At the mention of his now absent spleen, a small frown appeared on his forehead in thought. He was aware of what Mike pointed out, and it was currently a huge concern in his head in regards to whether he would be fit to return to service. There was still a big question mark over that. He wasn't going to get cleared yet anyway and was due to see the Army psychologist in a couple of weeks for assessment. "I'm cool," he assured them all with a laugh. "Just pacing myself. You think the soup is awesome, man, wait til you see what Leila made for dessert, even if it took us all day to get it right with about six attempts."

Rachel tried not to stare at Mike as he finally spoke. It was like hearing his voice actually made it worse instead of better. She'd always loved that drawl. She would have given her right arm to hear that drawl during the months he was gone. She did note the way he'd cleared his throat as their legs had touched, a breath rushing out of her lungs in relief. Clearing his throat wasn't a bad sign. Her eyes flicked to Rob, and she frowned a little. "You lost your spleen? I'm sorry, I didn't know. That was because of the..." she trailed off and wet her lips, not sure if the explosion was really dinner table material.

Leila only had eyes for Rob at this point, and while she had wanted him to eat, she knew it might not always be possible. The meds were needed, but she hated that they were fucking with his appetite. She leaned over to kiss his cheek before she just let her hand rest on his thigh as she ate her soup. "Cooking like back home? Well, that's a high compliment." She laughed as she shot Rob a look. "Just reveal all my cooking secrets why don't you. I can't help it if I'm not the world's most talented chef. At least it's edible by the sixth attempt."

Rob laughed, turning to his wife with a cheeky smile. "Hey, as long as it has apples and pastry somewhere, it's technically still apple pie and we cover all the sins in ice cream anyway. They'll never even see that weird sticky-out bit on the side," he teased and took a small spoonful of the soup. It did taste nice. She wasn't as bad a cook as he thought and it had been fun with them both spending the day together in the kitchen. Rob mostly sat and watched, helping out with little things where he could. It was all very domestic and he had loved every minute of it. He gave Rachel a small, wry smile. "Yeah, that's it. It could have been worse. I coulda lost more than my spleen. That side of my body took most of the impact, so it was probably inevitable."

Mike nodded a little in agreement at Rob's assessment. "Definitely coulda been worse..." He picked up his glass of soda in a small toast to his friend. "Just glad to still have ya' with us, Robbo. Always knew ya' were the fighter in the group." At this point, Mike wasn't sure how he was supposed to feel with Rachel being there sharing a friendly meal like this. After the disaster in the supermarket, he had tried to push it all out of his mind, and it was easy once Rob was located and focus was really about making sure he got home safely. Back then when he ran into Rachel, he had been close to falling into a grief that Rob really wasn't going to come home. He struggled to know how to deal with running into her, so he didn't. He just bolted. It seemed like a good idea at the time. He just wished he knew how he was supposed to approach this situation now. He was floundering, and typically like he always did, when he floundered, he got quiet and seemed to come across as moody. He wasn't moody, he just didn't have the best skills in dealing with emotional situations outside of his military comfort zone.

Leila smirked, happy to see her husband smiling and joking. The day in the kitchen really had been beneficial for both of them. Had even ended with some cream being used in a different capacity. "Now you're just being mean. And I happen to like that weird sticky-out bit. Adds some character." Her cooking had taken a huge leap since Rob had been away. She hadn't been exaggerating about her baking being her way of coping. Her cousins had had to suffer through it repeatedly in their younger years. She raised her glass in a toast as well, all of them having water, or soda in honour of Rachel, and Rob. "I know I'm definitely glad. And really, the bruising isn't as bad as you think. It's starting to get better. Who doesn't love a little bruise porn?"

Rachel picked up her glass to join the toast, and gave Rob a sheepish smile. "Sorry, I'm still learning the tactful side of social interactions. Always did suck at it, even without the alcohol. I'm really glad you're okay, and I'm glad I get to meet the man Leila couldn't stop talking about at Andrew's wedding. It's nice to have the chance to make some new friends." She took a sip of her soda before setting it back down. "Bruise porn? Well, I know I caused a few bruises in my time, but nothing battle worthy. Unless you count this one time me and Mike were--" Rachel abruptly stopped and raised her hand to tuck her hair behind her ears. "But I'm sure he doesn't need me telling that story. It's history."

Mike stared down into his soup, pressing his lips together. If it wasn't awkward before, it was now. Friends. That's what Rob had said, that he and Rachel should be friends, even if things didn't work out romantically. How was he supposed to be her friend if she kept slipping up about their past? He didn't want to talk about it. It made him feel like he had no control over his decisions, that how he felt and what led him to break up with her was reckless and stupid. Which is exactly what he started to feel they all thought. It wasn't like he hadn't warned her it was just some fun back then. He wasn't Rob, committment wasn't like a security blanket for him. It scared the fuck out of him. He didn't want anyone waiting for him. Was that such a horrible thing? He looked up, holding his hand up in front of him. "Should I strip or fart to break the awkwardness?" he offered, raising an eyebrow and then shooting Rob and Leila an apologetic look for bordering on fucking their dinner up. "How are you two enjoying finally having some married life together?" Subject change was as good as a holiday, right? If not, it was all Mike could think of at that moment. He did turn his head to look at Rachel briefly, though. What had she wanted him to say? He was nervous about all this enough without needing to try and justify himself again.

Rob blew out a heavy breath and shook his head. "Jeez, guys. Relax, alright? Chill. So, you used to fuck, and date. Date and fuck. Fuck not date. Whatever it was. Can you please just chill, for one night? I didn't get the feeling you hated each other, or that it was a messy split. I just thought it would be nice for us all to have a meal together and just... be together. Friends. Ain't all that long ago I was doubting I'd ever get chances like this again. Life's short, alright? Mike, dude," he said quietly, "you and I both know you could use some friends right now. Some company. Fucking doesn't need to come into it."

Mike met Rob's gaze and then gave a small nod. "Yeah, sorry, man. Didn't mean to be a jerk..."

Leila gave Rob's thigh a squeeze, wondering if their plan was really all that smart. She knew Rachel was carrying a torch, it was easy for her to pick up by the way she'd spoken about Mike, and the way she still looked at him. It was going to take some serious strength for her to just be a friend to him. Leila was starting to wonder if it was just going to start rubbing salt into the wound.

Rachel held her hand up. "Look, let's just chalk it up to nerves. It's just awkward as all fuck, and I'm sorry to Mike and to you guys. Having said that, while I don't need Mike farting to break the tension since I remember how rotten they could be. No offence, M," she offered him with a crooked smile. "I'd like to offer this instead." Rachel took a large gulp of her soda, still holding her hand up before she let out a loud belch. Then she picked up her spoon like nothing had happened and started eat her soup. "So does this have tomatoes?"

Leila blinked behind her glasses, watching the scene with a combination of amusement and fear. The amusement won out and she just started to laugh. "Yeah, it has tomatoes. I'm not even sure what you're supposed to call it. It was made from this Italian recipe but it kind of changed the second time I made it."

Rob's eyes were still locked on Mike's face, trying to make sure his friend was okay. They shared a silent gaze, something unreadable passing between them. Mike realised then that Rob was just as worried about him as he was about Rob. They really were brothers in every sense but blood. As much as he hated to admit it, clawing his way back to something normal after this deployment was more of a struggle than he expected. He didn't know if it was because everyone around him seemed happy in relationships, or if New York just seemed so large, busy, and noisy compared to the horrible environment in the Middle East. He knew he didn't have the same psychological strain that Rob did from being in an explosion and nearly losing his life, but Mike saw the aftermath of that sort of thing. Rob was right. This was nice, and this was probably exactly what he needed. He just had to make a conscious effort not to let his mind lapse back to the black hole. His gazed turned to Rachel for a few moments and he let out a breath to loosen up a little. "The meal is awesome, Leila. Ya' did real well, I'm impressed. I know how much Robbo loves his home cookin'. Rations ain't ever gonna come close."

Rob stuck his tongue out, making a small gagging sound. "Fuck that. You just deal, but man, no way is that grey shit lamb casserole. It looks like lamb's vomit, and you could strangle a rat with the noodles in the spaghetti. Or take someone's eye out. A real roast chicken dinner could almost give me an orgasm," he decided, pointing his spoon for emphasis.

Rachel raised her eyebrows at Leila. "Did you happen to make a roast chicken dinner, because if we need to leave the chicken and Rob alone, it'd be nice to know now so I can finish my soup first."

Leila winked at Rob before smiling at Rachel. "No, I didn't, but I'm starting to think maybe I should have. And thank you, Mike. I'm really glad you liked it. Nothing worse than you boys coming home to shit food. Although I could do without hearing about lamb vomit while trying to eat. Good thing my threshold has well and truly been tested, otherwise we'd be in trouble."

"At least I'm not talking about the slimey stuff that was coming out of the infected cut on my butt," Rob felt the need to point out and then gave Leila a bright smile. "But you really do make a great nurse. Even when we're laughing too much and you nearly take my eye out with the thermometer." He had scooped up a spoonful of soup, but most of it splashed back into the bowl when he started to laugh, needing to tuck his free hand against his side so he didn't burst open any wounds or hurt himself.

Mike shook his head in amusement. "Dude," he said, not really sure he had any other words. It was comforting to see Rob enjoy himself. Like, maybe there was a light at the end of the tunnel. Before he could let himself stop and analyse anything in his brain, he suddenly turned to Rachel and found the words, "What are you doing for Christmas?" falling from his mouth.

Leila had been staring at Rob, but the smile he gave her just made her start laughing. "Thank fuck you're not talking about that cut! Definitely not dinner table conversation. Maybe at dessert when there's no liquid meal in front of us. And I swear that thermometer has a mind of its own. Not my fault!" She rubbed her hand up and down his thigh, her own soup nearly a victim with all her laughing. It stopped abruptly though when she caught Mike's question, her eyes on Rob's friend and Rachel.

Rachel was grinning, but it faltered as she met Mike's gaze, her voice suddenly not working. "Um, I... ah... Nothing," she finished with a slight frown. She was annoyed at herself for suddenly struggling to speak. "My parents, they're, um... they're going away to some tropical island. I usually just curl up on the sofa with some movies. I don't even bother with parties."

Rob's eyes were bouncing back and forth between Mike and Rachel. He really wasn't trying to play cupid. If Mike didn't want a relationship, that was his call to make and Rob knew as well as anyone how irritating it could be if you weren't in one and people kept telling you that you should be, especially if they kept telling you who it should be with. He didn't want to lay any added stress on his friend. And sure, Mike split with her because he got shipped out, but he was home now. It might be easy for people to want to play matchmaker. The only thing was, they seemed to easily forget that just because he was here in the flesh at the present, it was for an indefinite period of time. He was on a rest break at the moment, so he would have some time, but if the war intensified over there, Mike could be gone again tomorrow. Rob, on the other hand, wouldn't, and it was something he was starkly aware of now he was healing and getting some mobility back. Physically, he probably wouldn't even meet the clearance requirements for another few months, psychologically could be a whole other story. You don't get blown up and nearly lose your life without it leaving some scarring. He was just thankful to have Leila to lean on. He couldn't fathom how he would be coping right now if he had to return to post-divorce misery in Littlerock in this damaged state. He'd probably go nuts. He picked up his piece of garlic bread and took a small bite. But that all aside, some people could still be friends when they broke up, right? He just really, really hoped Rachel could understand that Rob had been hinting earlier that Mike was going through a post-deployment rough patch, which was something any family member of a soldier had to understand. If she couldn't, it might be best for everyone if they did keep their distance. He shared a glance with Leila pressing his lips together slightly as he indicated he wasn't about to interrupt if this was some progress.

Mike didn't miss Rachel's frown, but because he couldn't actually read what it meant, he felt his confidence of a few moments before slip. His first thought was to assume it meant 'Fuck off, why should I tell you, cock face?' And then he thought the hesitation meant she had plans, but didn't want him to know what they were. None of his business. Of course they were none of his business. He shifted his hold on his glass. This really was awkward and he wish he knew a better strategy to deal with it. All other exes in his past he never crossed paths with again, let alone share a friendly meal with them. Typical, his attempt at a conversation with her died in the ass. "Yeah, same. Folks are headin' to California to do the family thing, but I ain't goin'. Might fly back to Littlerock for Thanksgivin', though. They ain't seen me since... yeah," he paused, giving a small shrug. "They can be talkin' to me on the phone and shit, but they ain't ever really convinced I'm safe til they can hug me. Probably why Robbo's family wanna touch base with him here."

Rachel set down her spoon as she leaned back in her chair a little, turning to better face Mike. She wasn't trying to put him under more pressure, but she got the feeling he needed to understand he had her full attention. She hadn't intentionally shut down the conversation, it was just her stupid brain that didn't work. She hadn't even noticed that Leila and Rob had stopped speaking, assuming they were continuing in their own little married bubble, while Rachel and Mike were in their... whatever it was bubble. "California? I didn't even realised you had family out there. Thought all your family stuff would have happened in Texas. You know, part of me is curious about your hometown. I want to know what it is in the water that breeds guys like you and Rob. I think it's the same for anyone that cares about you. I know I definitely wasn't going to believe it. I can't blame anyone's family for needing that contact. Our hearts and heads don't always believe the truth until we have physical proof."

Rob chewed the crust of his garlic bread thoughtfully before a small, devious smile flickered on his lips before it was gone again when he cleared his throat. "Hey, Leila... babe? I need the bathroom," he lied, setting his spoon down and shuffling back in the seat. He glanced back and forth between Mike and Rachel. "Sorry, guys. You'll have to excuse me for a few moments. You'll be right on your own? Good. Make yourselves at home." When he looked at Leila, grabbing for his crutches, he clearly had absolutely no remorse lying to leave Mike and Rachel alone for a few minutes.

Mike looked across the table at Rob, suspicious it was a ploy, but then, Rob was injured, right? Surely he wasn't just playing on it. He nodded. "Yeah, 'course, dude. Don't fall in, alright. I want some of that apple pie you've been talkin' up," he said and glanced back at Rachel. "Yeah, my Mom's family are from California. Dad met her on a summer vacation when they were teenagers. Summer love, all that stuff. Pretty cool."

Leila kept her face straight as she pushed her chair back to get to start to help Rob. She'd thought she'd seen the devious smile, but she couldn't be sure. She gave a smile to Mike and Rachel as she looped her arm around Rob's waist. "Maybe we should just skip the second course when we get back, and go straight to the pie? Think about it, and let me know. Meanwhile, Mr Laird, we better take care of that call from nature. Think all that water you've been drinking is clearing out."

Rachel glanced at Leila and Rob and gave a nod. "Sure, skipping to pie sounds really good." When they'd left the room, her gaze was on Mike again. She was wondering why she hadn't known his mom's family was from Cali, but she realised a lot of their time was spent talking about which position they were going to fuck in next. "That really is pretty cool. Very Grease. But what happened after the vacation? How did they know it was more than summer love?"

Mike watched Rob and Leila leave the room, albeit slowly. Rob was clearly still in pain, despite the external injuries getting that icky healing look about them. It was the internal ones that took longer. Mike was just thankful Leila was so good at helping him. She seemed to have it down, no bother, and Mike didn't miss the way she touched Rob's hair or how they shared kisses whenever they could. It was nice to watch. He smirked with a slight shrug. "This little tiny thing most like to call a fetus," he pointed to himself and held up his hand. "Mom got knocked up, Dad did the right thing. They were some of the lucky ones, though. They really did love each other."

Rachel grinned. "Guess sometimes the baby coming first really does turn out right. As opposed to a baby being part of a five-year plan," she added with a finger point at herself. "Must be even cooler knowing you were the one responsible for them coming together."

"Dunno, really. I know it wasn't easy with them bein' so young. I know my Mom couldn't have more kids after me. But that was okay. They dealt. I ain't thinkin' life really is like Grease when it comes to the crunch, though. Or any movie. I won't say they had a fairytale romance. They didn't. They didn't have a lot of money, they fought when I was younger. But things eased up when Dad got a good job and then it was easier." Mike shrugged and took a sip of his soda. "No fairytale comes without some shit."

"Well, no one deserves the fairytale without dealing with the shit. I think most times Prince Charming just needs to know that sometimes Snow White's going to be the one coming to the rescue, or the one that's there when Prince Charming's dragon slaying gets tough, or whatever." Rachel scrunched up her nose as she laughed softly. "I think maybe that metaphor was starting to get away from me. But you know what I mean, right? Snow White might not always want the easy happy ending because she's learned that working for something pays off."

Mike scratched the back of his head and then leant back in his seat. He knew when a metaphor stopped being a metaphor. "Prince Charmin' has gotta be at least present, though, and he ain't slayin' dragons, it's human lives," he couldn't help replying with. He glanced up at the ceiling, letting out a small breath so he didn't let everything just fall back into that strange awkwardness again. "I ain't ever been good at metaphors," he said, clearing his throat.

Rachel smiled wryly as she curled some of her hair around her finger. "Good, because neither am I. Sometimes the blonde really isn't just an excuse for being clueless. There's a reason why make-up is my thing. Doesn't mean Snow White can't be deep, just means she needs a little time to get there." She looked down, dropping her hand to fidget with her fingers as her leg started to bounce. "Thought you saved lives?"

Mike gave a slight, humourless laugh and shook his head. "No, I lose more than I save. That's what I meant. It's not dragons, it's human lives. Lives like Rob's. Men who have wives and families, like Leila, who ain't gonna ever make it home to them. It ain't no fairy tale and sometimes, there just ain't happy endings."

Rachel leaned forward, her arm resting on the edge of the table as she studied Mike for a long moment, the swirl of her thoughts taking a while to coalesce into something she could say. "Then wouldn't it just be nice to having someone to talk to about the non-happy endings. To know that it's nice for the... life slayers to have someone to share it with. And, please forgive me for life savers. I have no idea what I'm talking about clearly. I know what I want to meant. I just... I can't get the words out. I'm sorry."

"What do you want from me, Rach?" Mike asked her quietly, looking down at the table where his hand was rest beside his soup bowl.

"A chance for you to find out I can deal with this. With you. As a friend. As a lady you just sometimes happen to talk to. As whatever. I'm not... I'm not asking for more because I know you don't want to give it." She wet her lips as she sighed. "Maybe, down the track, if you're still here, and we do okay with the whatever there could be a date. No fucking. No expectations. Just hanging out."

Mike really wanted a beer. He knew that wasn't fair, but he really did want one right at that moment. He wanted the apple pie and then a beer and then maybe a Xanax. She had to mention the date, didn't she? And down the track. How did they even know there was going to be a down the track?! "But you didn't deal with it, did you? You told me yourself you went back on the piss. How do I know if we hang out... whatever... and I go again you ain't gonna just do that all over again? How is this, you and me, good for any of that?"

Rachel ran her fingers through her hair. "Okay, point. But you also dumped me. To be fair I had no warning. You dumped me on Valentine's Day, and then just shipped out. I fell off the wagon because... Because I was starting to fall for you, and then you just shoved me away. I can deal with it given the chance. I can! I know I can. I'm back on the wagon, and I... just want to be your friend," Rachel finished quietly. "Just give me a chance to get my mouth and brain coordinating."

Mike rubbed the back of his neck wondering what the fuck of a Godzilla bladder Rob must have. "No warnin'? I lost count of the amount of times I told you I could get called at any minute, would get called within a few months when things broke out in Afghanistan. And told you I wasn't lookin' for anythin' serious because of it. To tell me I gave you no warnin' ain't fair, Rachel. I'm a goddamn Army Medic. Ain't that warnin'? Bein' shipped out with no notice is the cut and dry of it. I don't think my commandin' officer gave a fuck it was Valentine's Day."

"And did I tell you I didn't want to know? Did I give you any indication that I minded? I know I fucked up, Mike. I do. But I didn't expect it to feel so... horrible. To feel like I'd been punched through the chest. I know it was just fun, and you weren't looking for anything serious. Doesn't mean it didn't start to turn into anything. And maybe it was just me, and it was on my side. And if that's the case then I'm sorry and I'll fuck off." She looked at him. "You didn't let me say goodbye. And I know you didn't ask for it, but for the past eight months I haven't not woken up thinking about you. Worrying if you're okay. Wondering if you're hurt. Hoping you'd make it home safe."

Mike couldn't help it. He was getting upset, and there was a tiny rational non-military piece of his brain telling him that was probably, well, irrational. But the rest of his brain was bigger and more controlling and he shook his head, pushing back from the table. "Not many soldiers know how to say goodbye, Rachel! It ain't Grease and it ain't a fairy tale! You're makin' this all sound like I did it to punish you and can you just stop and listen for a few moments how big of an ass you're makin' me out to be?! You're playin' off my decisions and morals against yours, and that just sucks! And makes me feel like a piece of shit, because you ain't got a hope in hell of knowin' what it is actually like to be sent to a place like that, dealin' with death and destruction, war and evil every single day! I ended it because it was turnin' into somethin'! Don't you get that? I ain't Rob, and I ain't ever gonna be! I don't have the guts to marry someone just to know they'll have a piece of somethin' to hold onto! You're sittin' here sayin' friendship, but all I'm hearin' outta ya' mouth is relationship and committment! I'm just... I'm..." He lost his steam, putting his head into his hands as he tried to wrap it around all the emotions pooling around in there all of a sudden. Maybe Rob was right, maybe he needed to see a psychologist for some debriefing too. He had been just hanging on, until the news Rob was MIA came through. Maybe it affected him more than he realised. At the time, all he wanted to do was ease Leila's pain. "I'm tired... really tired... and I don't wanna do this."

In the bathroom, Rob was sitting on the closed toilet lid, with Leila perched on the edge of the tub beside him. They were holding hands and she was just stroking his hair while they waited and gave Mike and Rachel some time alone to talk, even just for a few minutes. But then Mike's raised voice could be heard, and Rob lifted his head and shot Leila a guilty look. "Uh oh. That wasn't part of my plan..." He chewed on his lip briefly. "It could be good yelling, right? Sort of yelling. Resonant talking?" Then, because the apartment was so small, every word of Mike's resonance could be heard, and Rob swallowed, letting his head drop a little with a small sigh.

"At least there hasn't been a door slamming," Leila murmured. She glanced at the bathroom door before looking back at Rob, her fingers rubbing against his scalp briefly. "I know it wasn't part of your plan, but maybe it needs to happen. Maybe they just need to yell it out before either of them can get past it. They haven't talked in months. Not since some supermarket run-in Rachel was telling me about. Once they know where they stand, that's the only time they're ever going to be able to try and be something. I think Rachel's heart is in the right place, she's just having trouble putting it into words Mike won't feel pressured with." Leila leaned forward and caught Rob's lips in a soft kiss. "Mike's hurting, Littlerock. And I think he's just having trouble knowing what he needs."

Rob rubbed his hands over his face and then looked at her from between his fingers. "Does she really understand?" he asked, hating himself for it. "Can she really just be his friend? I know that ain't everyone's cup of tea. Not everyone is cut out for it. Some people can be real good pals with their exes, others just can't. I just don't know if her talking about dating and getting together in the future is helping him or hindering him. He knows what he did to her, he ain't needing her to lay the guilt on after he's been serving for eight months. He needs a rest, and he needs friends." He took his hands away from his face and looked up at her. "You get it, right? You get that it even could've gone either way with me? Maybe it would've too if I hadn't had a failed marriage under my belt to know that I wasn't wanting to throw away something important. I ain't saying he threw it away, I just... I'm worried for both of them that she really can't cope with it. Because sometimes we don't come home. I'm sure Paul's wife and babies will vouch for that one."

Leila held up her hand, fingers spread wide. "Don't ask me. To be honest, I'm not sure I could have been your friend. I would have understood, but I would have needed some time to adjust and that's not something that happens immediately. And it sucks, I know. But you have to understand... I fell for you quick, and hard. If we hadn't gotten married, and you still went away - I would have waited. Just like Rachel did, only Mike broke up with her. You Army guys are irresistible. It's not easy cutting ties. I think... in all honesty, she needs to fuck up and get out the wrong words before she gets the right ones, and before she can really know that she can be his friend because it's what he needs more than anything else. I'm your friend, and your wife, and still kinda your girlfriend. I'm everything, but I still stumble. And I get you don't always come home, but I can't not love you with everything in my being."

Rob held his own hand up. "They broke up nine months ago. That's a long time. Like, enough time to create a baby even," he said, as if if needed emphasis. "Not that I'm trying to make a point with that or anything," he added hastily. He was straining to try and hear what was going on out there. Maybe they had both left? Rob was going to feel like a huge dickhead if that was the case. He hadn't meant anything to go like this. All he wanted for Mike to have someone who understood what he was going through and why.

"Maybe Rachel just needs someone to actually explain it all to her? I've had you, and I've had Mike. And I know we didn't break up, but I did have support." Leila shrugged. "I don't know, Littlerock. I wish I had an answer, but all I can do it guess. Maybe we should go back in there? Try and salvage dessert at least..."

Rob scrunched his nose and lips up, pulling a face. "Do we have to? Can I just bring the apple pie in here and... you know, hide?" he asked hopefully, looking up at her sheepishly. "You want me to talk to her, don't you? What if I fuck it up? Or say the wrong thing? I'm biased. I just got blown up and nearly burnt to a crisp. I ain't exactly got an impartial view right now."

Leila grinned as she leaned forward to kiss her husband's cheek. "Do you want me to go back in there and tell them you needed to lie down? I don't think anyone would question it. You can have your apple pie in our room while I go out there and face the awkwardness alone." She was only teasing a little but, her blue eyes sparkling with amusement behind her glasses. "You don't have to talk to her tonight, but maybe at some point. Just remember I love you, and I'll still give you sponge baths."

"No, because I was blessed with a painfully guilty conscience and I'd probably want to wet myself from lying," Rob said wryly and scratched his fingers through his hair. "I can't lie to save myself. It's embarrassing. Ain't like they'll all know I was lying back then. Mike will. Remind me to work on those covert sneaky ninja skills. Or I'll just leave it up to you and your devious cousins." He stiffly pulled himself up, tucking the crutches under his arm and taking a few moments to make sure he wasn't going to fall flat on his face. He was getting some mobility back, even if he moved like a grandpa most of the time. "Better go face the music."

Word Count | 6,976