Ficlet: One Time When Clark Didn't Mind Magic So Much
Title: One Time When Clark Didn't Mind Magic So Much
Fandom: DC
Characters/Pairings: Clark/Bruce
Genre: Slash/Humor/Crack?
Rating: PG
Word Count: 427
Summary: Superman is stuck. Batman finds a way out.
Notes: For mithen's Shuffle Challenge M: "me in honey"
Batman is staring at him.
“Shut up,” Superman says, his every movement fraught with sticky resistance.
“I didn’t say anything,” Batman responds. There is definitely amusement in his voice.
“Not. One. Word. To anyone. EVER.”
Batman mimes zipping his lips, but doesn’t pull his gaze away from Superman, who is drenched head to toe in thick, amber honey.
“You look-”
“Bruce, don’t even say it-”
“-yummy.”
Superman sighs, shoulders slumping in defeat. “Have I mentioned how much I hate magic?”
“Occasionally.”
“I can’t move,” Superman grunts, trying to pry one foot up off of the ground, but all he manages to do is pull his foot loose from his boot. Honey squelches, cold and uncomfortable, between his bare toes. “Oh fantastic.”
“Clark,” Batman says, moving forward, careful to avoid stepping on the sweet glue that has trapped his friend. “Do you want me to call Zatanna or-?”
“No!” Superman shouts, horrified. “This is…God. This is so embarrassing. Maybe…maybe I’ll just wait for it to dry and…I don’t know…”
“Or,” says Batman, coming to stand before him, “maybe I could help?”
“How?” Superman asks, blankly.
Batman drags one gloved finger across Superman’s chest, tracing his S-shield, and pulling away a large quantity of sugary gooeyness. He places his sticky finger in his mouth and sucks, a delighted expression dawning on his cowled-face. “You are yummy.”
Superman feels something go pop inside his brain, but doesn’t object when Batman pulls off his glove and drags his now bare finger down along the side of Superman’s face.
“Open up,” Batman says.
“Wha-?” Before he can react, Batman shoves his warm, sticky finger inside Superman’s mouth, and quite unintentionally, Superman sucks, the honey melting on his tongue, until there is nothing left but the taste of Batman’s finger sliding along the inside of his cheeks.
“Oh,” says Superman, once Batman retracts his digit.
They are suddenly very close, and quite without warning, Batman pulls Superman’s face down towards him, their mouths coming together in a sticky meeting of hot breath and potent sweetness. Superman can taste the residue honey on Batman’s tongue because Batman’s tongue is in his mouth-!
After a long while, they pull apart, or try to, their lips glued together stubbornly.
“You sure you don’t want Zatanna to come and clean you up?” Batman asks, though it comes out sounding more like: uumshuudwanzanacumacleenyap?
“Eryshir,” Superman responds. Translation: very sure. Batman seems to understand anyway.
They stay locked together in a tight embrace, even long after all the honey has been licked away.